Is this a good site

P

poly6

New member
So while looking up more information on the poly dating scene, I came across this site.

http://www.polymatchmaker.com/


Does anyone know of this site? Has anyone been on it or is anyone currently on it? Is it any good and would you personally recommend it?

By the way, it's a pleasure to meet all of you.
 
poly6 said:
So while looking up more information on the poly dating scene, I came across this site.

http://www.polymatchmaker.com/


Does anyone know of this site? Has anyone been on it or is anyone currently on it? Is it any good and would you personally recommend it?

By the way, it's a pleasure to meet all of you.
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I've been on PMM, and off it, and on it, and off it several times.

It used to have a fairly active forum, but they've shut that down due to problems with spam; no indication of whether/when they might bring it back.

When the forum was active, a couple of years ago, there was something of a sense of community on the site, and an intermittently active chat room. Now that the forum is gone, that sense of community has evaporated and the chat room is generally empty, even when there's a designated topic on Sunday evenings.

Many features of the site are available only to people who pay for a premium membership, including the ability to initiate a message to another member and to use the (empty) chat room.

I would have to say there is not currently a critical mass of active users on the site, though it may or may not be growing.
 
I checked it out once there was no one anywhere near where I live.
 
I was an active poster om pmm for many years but never had any luck on there as a dating site (seemed like most were couples seeking a girlfriend to share). I enjoyed the forums though
 
I thought PMM was a reasonably good (forum and) dating site when I was active there, but that was some six years ago. I know it has changed in a number of ways since then.

Its one weakness was that it didn't have enough members to provide a lot of people in one's own physical vicinity.
 
So I take it the site is not recommended then. Well for someone looking into online dating who is poly and extremely kinky, what would you recommend. I tried okcupid about two or so months ago and it didn't really work out for me. Any other advice?
 
Inyourendo said:
I was an active poster om pmm for many years but never had any luck on there as a dating site (seemed like most were couples seeking a girlfriend to share). I enjoyed the forums though
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I wouldn't say most people on PMM are couples, though certainly some are. At a glance, I'd say the proportion is lower than on the personal ad boards on this site.

It also has about the usual proportion of people in the overlap between poly and kink.

It's just that the number of members is relatively low, the site is hard to use with out paying for a membership, and the forum is gone.

Aside from that, it's just fine.
 
Fetlife is very active, and it seems to be quite easy to make friends there. Don't know how often or easily a Fetlife friendship develops into a date/romance, though.
 
kdt26417 said:
Fetlife is very active, and it seems to be quite easy to make friends there. Don't know how often or easily a Fetlife friendship develops into a date/romance, though.
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I'm not real kinky but did create a FetLife account a long time ago, to see what it's all about after knowing that so many people here seem to belong. I think FetLife, as a website, is not user-friendly to navigate at all. People talk about how they've met others through that site and I just don't understand how that is possible, because you don't have many ways to filter a search. It's not a forum or a blog, it's somewhere in between. Maybe the fact that I'm in New York City just means I get too many results to go through. Or I haven't figured it out. You have to join these groups... I dunno. It is very confusing to me.

As for Polymatchmaker, it was always disappointing to me for meeting potential dates. I've really only dialogued with two people there, but we never met. I was always shocked at how few people came up in my searches, since I live in a huge city, but I only look for straight non-smoking men, which I suppose limits things somewhat, but to only get a handful of results, and most without pictures... ugh. They changed their policy for messaging people, so you can't make first contact if you're a free member, but you can reply if someone contacts you, I believe. Used to be anyone could message anyone. The forums were great - I do hope they bring them back.

The most luck I've ever had for dating polyfolk was with OKCupid and, indeed, most people on PMM also have OKC accounts and will transition conversations from PMM to OKC, since PMM makes it so difficult to dialogue privately with anyone.
 
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There's just one other poly-friendly dating site I know of, BeyondTwo. It seems to get good reviews, but I haven't tried it. I think your biggest disadvantage there would be that it's a rather new site, and won't have a very large number of members. Still one never knows what might work for you so that's why I mention it.

Fetlife reminds me of Facebook in some ways, while it also contains many forums some of which have some pretty in-depth discussion threads. It doesn't seem to have much in the way of filtering mechanisms (for deciding who you should message), but it seems like you can just about pick members at random and they'll probably accept a friendship request. Sometimes you can look at who's interested in a fetish that you're interested in, or you can look at who belongs to a group (forum) that you belong to (within Fetlife). [shrug] I don't think it's really designed to be a dating site, but it does seem to have an awful lot of members you can meet.

I have the same handle on Fetlife as here (kdt26417) and you can friend me there if you want; just let me know you're "poly6." Fetlife has a search window, and you can search for location (e.g. city/State) names as well as for usernames. I visit Fetlife regularly but I don't do much there; most of what I do is shadow my metamour who is quite a bit more active there than I am. I'm plain old vanilla and so I'm mainly there as a show of support for him (and for kinksters in general).

Beyond OKC, PMM, Fetlife, and BeyondTwo, my recommendations for you would venture into the realms of finding (a) local poly group/s in your area, joining, and attending its events. By making (platonic) friends who are poly, you may later on find yourself growing friendships into romances, who knows. If this approach interests you let me know and I'll provide some links and stuff you can use to aid in your search. But as far as poly-friendly dating sites go, I'm all used up.
 
Fetlife is a great place to find out about local meet and greets for kinksters called "munches." People meet in a public location in a restaurant (usually) or food court or a public park, in street clothes, just to talk and connect. There you might make friends who will tell you about BDSM parties (if you're into that), or other actual kink events. Or you might end up with a lover/partner, eventually, for private play or a relationship.
 
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