Hi everyone,
Very new to this site, and fairly new to polyamory. I'm actually not 100% certain my wife even is poly, I don't think she's certain either (nor does she seem to feel a need to label herself, which is fine with me). Regardless, we've been open/non-monog for the last year or so. Recently, she traveled to meet someone, which was a lot of firsts. The first person she's admitted to feeling love for, the first person she's been physical with in any way, the first person she's had sex with when I wasn't included, the first time she's been gone more than a few hours visiting someone... it was a tough week for me, handling so many firsts.
We got through it, and my wife is incredible. She came home saying how she loves me more than ever, and feels so much confidence in our marriage, etc. I was honest about how much I struggled while she was gone, and I'm working still on identifying why it's so hard for me. All the usual fears and insecurities, I think, that are not proving to be easy to get over. I know I will, in time.
All I'm really looking for right now is someone to tell me...it's going to be okay. I feel really alone in dealing with this, because no one in my life knows we're open and I have no friends with a similar dynamic. My wife's friends know, but I don't feel I can share with them. I'm an introvert with a small social network, and I don't have anyone I feel I can turn to when things get hard (or even when they're good). I just feel like it would make a big difference for me to hear someone say that it gets easier, that it does lead to good things, that all this challenge will lead to beautiful growth, and that I'm not alone in what I'm undertaking.
Just reading some of these threads has been amazing, but if anyone wouldn't mind throwing a little love here, it would mean more than you know.
Take care, be safe, & thank you in advance
Very new to this site, and fairly new to polyamory. I'm actually not 100% certain my wife even is poly, I don't think she's certain either (nor does she seem to feel a need to label herself, which is fine with me). Regardless, we've been open/non-monog for the last year or so. Recently, she traveled to meet someone, which was a lot of firsts. The first person she's admitted to feeling love for, the first person she's been physical with in any way, the first person she's had sex with when I wasn't included, the first time she's been gone more than a few hours visiting someone... it was a tough week for me, handling so many firsts.
We got through it, and my wife is incredible. She came home saying how she loves me more than ever, and feels so much confidence in our marriage, etc. I was honest about how much I struggled while she was gone, and I'm working still on identifying why it's so hard for me. All the usual fears and insecurities, I think, that are not proving to be easy to get over. I know I will, in time.
All I'm really looking for right now is someone to tell me...it's going to be okay. I feel really alone in dealing with this, because no one in my life knows we're open and I have no friends with a similar dynamic. My wife's friends know, but I don't feel I can share with them. I'm an introvert with a small social network, and I don't have anyone I feel I can turn to when things get hard (or even when they're good). I just feel like it would make a big difference for me to hear someone say that it gets easier, that it does lead to good things, that all this challenge will lead to beautiful growth, and that I'm not alone in what I'm undertaking.
Just reading some of these threads has been amazing, but if anyone wouldn't mind throwing a little love here, it would mean more than you know.
Take care, be safe, & thank you in advance