Looking for a man to join us.
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Openbook23
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Feeld is a pretty good app for that. This website (polyamory.com) isn't really a dating website. It's for information.
Some people have luck with OKC. There's also #open, but it seems to have fewer people than Feeld, at least in my area.
Some things to be careful of along the way--a lot of men would likely be interested in this, but plenty will just be thinking of awesome threesome sex with two women. I recommend avoiding those (unless you want that, I guess). It won't be long term. If you want a LTR relationship, I would actually say no sex until you are friends, or it feels right. Again, that's up to you, but it might weed out some of the men I mention above. (FYI, I'm a poly man, for context.)
In any case, be very clear about what you do and don't want. A lot of single men will be interested, but they might not be polyamorous. Also, I'm guessing you want a triad here. That's really hard to pull off. You might be better served independently dating some men, until one seems like a good fit, and is also interested in the other partner. That's how triads usually start (when they work). But there are always exceptions! Good luck.
Some people have luck with OKC. There's also #open, but it seems to have fewer people than Feeld, at least in my area.
Some things to be careful of along the way--a lot of men would likely be interested in this, but plenty will just be thinking of awesome threesome sex with two women. I recommend avoiding those (unless you want that, I guess). It won't be long term. If you want a LTR relationship, I would actually say no sex until you are friends, or it feels right. Again, that's up to you, but it might weed out some of the men I mention above. (FYI, I'm a poly man, for context.)
In any case, be very clear about what you do and don't want. A lot of single men will be interested, but they might not be polyamorous. Also, I'm guessing you want a triad here. That's really hard to pull off. You might be better served independently dating some men, until one seems like a good fit, and is also interested in the other partner. That's how triads usually start (when they work). But there are always exceptions! Good luck.
We just constantly get newbies here who think polyamory is all about triads. (I blame our mass media.) The reality is, polyamory means you get to date or have relationships with multiple people, all of whom are aware of each other. This does not mean you start as a couple who seeks to share one other person ("adding a third").
The reality is, you and your partner are not a couple blob. You are individuals with unique tastes in partners. What happens if you start to date some hottie who is all excited to have sex with two beautiful women, only to find out he really prefers one of you over the other? Or one of you likes him, but the other loses interest?
Please read this article:
davidlnoble.livejournal.com
And get a copy of the book Opening Up, too.
Most formerly monoamorous couples are very entangled, and decide to do "polyamory" "together" for some reason, meaning they choose to not date separately and each find their own partners, but set their sights on finding one person who wants to be shared. In fact, most poly couples find that dating separately is much much easier and more guaranteed to be successful.
I am a woman in a long term poly nesting relationship with a woman, and we both have always sought our own bfs. I wouldn't want to have group sex all the time. My gf's libido is less strong than mine. So she'd probably take a pass on sex when the guy and I wanted to do it, lots of the time. That would be awkward.
Some people do parallel poly, where their partners never even meet each other, and that's fine, too.
The reality is, you and your partner are not a couple blob. You are individuals with unique tastes in partners. What happens if you start to date some hottie who is all excited to have sex with two beautiful women, only to find out he really prefers one of you over the other? Or one of you likes him, but the other loses interest?
Please read this article:
So, someone called you a Unicorn Hunter?
This article is a long, technical discussion of what being a "Unicorn Hunter" means, what's wrong with it, and how people in such a situation can try to avoid the negative stereotypes associated with such behavior and get the things that they are ultimately looking for. It is written in a…
davidlnoble.livejournal.com
And get a copy of the book Opening Up, too.
Most formerly monoamorous couples are very entangled, and decide to do "polyamory" "together" for some reason, meaning they choose to not date separately and each find their own partners, but set their sights on finding one person who wants to be shared. In fact, most poly couples find that dating separately is much much easier and more guaranteed to be successful.
I am a woman in a long term poly nesting relationship with a woman, and we both have always sought our own bfs. I wouldn't want to have group sex all the time. My gf's libido is less strong than mine. So she'd probably take a pass on sex when the guy and I wanted to do it, lots of the time. That would be awkward.
Some people do parallel poly, where their partners never even meet each other, and that's fine, too.
Hello 2Queens,
Feeld seems to be getting the most positive reviews nowadays as far as online poly dating is concerned. OKCupid used to be the #1 recommendation, but it seems to have some functionality problems now. Mind you, you don't have to limit yourself to an online search, you can also get out there and meet people in person. Polyamory is pretty new in our society, so it is likely you'll have to explain it to people, and let them decide for themselves how they feel about it. You can increase the chances of meeting poly-friendly people if you go to fringe events: Ren Faires, BDSM munches, sci-fi cons, indie concerts, things like that. Just look for things that interest you, clubs and classes are good to join as well.
Regards,
Kevin T.
Feeld seems to be getting the most positive reviews nowadays as far as online poly dating is concerned. OKCupid used to be the #1 recommendation, but it seems to have some functionality problems now. Mind you, you don't have to limit yourself to an online search, you can also get out there and meet people in person. Polyamory is pretty new in our society, so it is likely you'll have to explain it to people, and let them decide for themselves how they feel about it. You can increase the chances of meeting poly-friendly people if you go to fringe events: Ren Faires, BDSM munches, sci-fi cons, indie concerts, things like that. Just look for things that interest you, clubs and classes are good to join as well.
Regards,
Kevin T.
davidisfun67
Active member
I am looking. I am single male. I live in Utah.
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