Valynn
Active member
I feel drained, hollowed out to a point. I came into my relationship as a friend and a equal. But in the end I realize that Angela did not see me that way. She saw me as a quick fix/or a sex toy, to be used and discarded as she wanted. And when I refused to bow to her demands & fell in love with JR. She thought she could end it all and that would be it.
I made the mistake of saying to myself "We can make this work! We communicate & are all on the same page." Accepting what Angela was saying & ignoring the slights to my boundaries. Thinking that it was growing pains between her & I becoming closer. I know now that this was not the case. And just about everything she has told me is a lie. I am glad that I didn't waste years trying to make a square peg fit into a round hole like I have in the past.
I will continue to support JR as much as humanly possible.
All in all I have learned a few things going through this:
For some backstory
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=118307
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=124441
I made the mistake of saying to myself "We can make this work! We communicate & are all on the same page." Accepting what Angela was saying & ignoring the slights to my boundaries. Thinking that it was growing pains between her & I becoming closer. I know now that this was not the case. And just about everything she has told me is a lie. I am glad that I didn't waste years trying to make a square peg fit into a round hole like I have in the past.
I will continue to support JR as much as humanly possible.
All in all I have learned a few things going through this:
- Do not allow my boundaries to be tested, I have them for a reason.
- If things feel fishy or off. First communicate my worries. If they continue to persist, break ties. Things will not get better.
- Do not try to begin a business partnership while working on a new romantic relationship with the same person. It's either romantic or business
- Do not allow NRE to cloud my judgments.
- Try and get a relationship agreements in writing. Knowing that people will remember only things that concern them. Having an formal agreement will be easier to squash disagreements.
For some backstory
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=118307
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=124441
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