Her son is 2 almost 3 years old. When I talk to her on the phone he tells me hi and sometimes what he did during the day. I have met him once. We took him to the park and we both played with him. His speech is still hard for dad to understand and so if/when her son does talk about me it sounds like he is saying momma and not my name.
So you have a man who's hitting his wife, knocking her around, and grabbing her by the hair and you're going to continue seeing her behind his back, and seeing his son....and one day the son is going to have clear speech.
You're playing with fire. Her priority, if he's hitting her, is to get that part of her life straightened out and get herself and her son safe, not to be having an affair behind his back and introducing her son to the affair partner. This is a guaranteed way to escalate the situation.
He slapped her in the face and through her out of the chair and onto the ground. .... grabbed her hair and pulled her up. She was able to escape to the bedroom and grab her phone and call me.
He originally thought she called the cops, but found out it was me she called. She made promise not to call the cops and the only reason I didn't is at the time I didn't her her complete address.
Again: if he's hitting her, and harming her child, her job is to get out. Not to call her girlfriend. Pardon me if I seem harsh, but when someone is hitting you and throwing you around, you call the police.
Why has she promised not to call the cops?
I have since opened her eyes to the abuse she has been going through even while her and her husband were dating. For now she is staying but if her husband hits either one of them one more time she is out. ....
She wasn't aware that being slapped around, thrown to the ground, and yanked by her hair is abuse? Was he physically abusive before the marriage?
It is her decision on what she does. I just told her that no matter what I am here for her and I'm not going anywhere.
I personally would be encouraging someone to leave if they're being hit and thrown around.
To me she is worth everything the limited time together, etc. She is perfect.
To quote Marcus: YIKES! No, she's not perfect. She's a fallible human being just like everyone else, and this sort of comment, along with the two of you cheating on her husband, along with her calling you instead of the police, makes you both seem like children and neither of you thinking about the seriousness of your actions.
I'm with Kevin. You are cheating on her husband with her. You are both lying to and deceiving him. The fact that he's doing bad things does not justify her doing bad things.
I'm going to say again: she needs to be dealing with her marriage and the abusive situation right now, NOT dating, and NOT cheating on her husband. You are both playing with fire and she has a child who is also going to be caught in the explosion.
