New & Affair to polyamory

E

ebony1ivory2

New member
I'm P and I have been married to J for 26 years with 2 daughters. About 19 years into our marriage because of health and emotional issues (him) we stopped having sex. After about 2 years of taking care of myself I told him I couldn't live without sex, to which he replied "Do what you have to do." So I started finding short term lovers. After 2 years of this I met R and we became exclusive. R is single and knew I was married but not willing to leave my husband from the beginning. Two years ago after being with R for a year I was very unhappy in my marriage (lots of emotional abuse). I told J I was leaving him and I told him about R. He asked me not to leave, he would change and I could continue to see R. Knowing about R gave J the incentive he needed to change for the better and we now have sex again (after 5 years of none). Now 3 years after meeting R and 2 years after telling J we are all friends. I am the hinge in a vee with R and J. But we are in a closed relationship. R doesn't want to be with anyone but me and I have given J the opportunity to be with someone else but he doesn't want to either. J and I have just moved into a larger house and in a few months time R will be moving in with us. I cannot even begin to express how happy I am with the two men in my life. I love them both like crazy but for very different reasons.
I am so happy to have found this site as I need the resources and words of wisdom from you more experienced in polyamory.
 
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ebony1ivory2 said:
Knowing about R gave J the incentive he needed to change for the better and we now have sex again (after 5 years of none). Now 3 years after meeting R and 2 years after telling J we are all friends. I am the hinge in a vee with R and J.
Click to expand...

Sounds like you'd have an awful lot of wise words for us, ebony. What you've re-organized and built is no small feat. I hope you'll share more of your experiences wtih us. Welcome.
 
Greetings ebony1ivory2,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

Sounds like things have worked out well in the end, even though there was some rough terrain there for awhile. I'm glad you could join us, and hope to get to know you better.

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

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If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 
Hello and welcome!

I think we may have a number of things in common - although not the emotional abuse (Thank heavens!). I love my husband to bits (and pieces), but we rarely have sex. Since acquiring my boyfriend (long story, lots of angst, but it all worked out) we/I have been much happier. We have all been co-habitating for 4 years now.

I am the luckiest girl in the world! We are not closed, but not really "looking" either
 
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