Openbook23
Active member
Hi all. Great conversations here, with really helpful tips. I'm in Ohio, 49/M/cis/hetero. My partner and I have had an open relationship for 5 years (she specifically asked for it, though I was always open to the idea). In that time, she's had several partners. I did not even try until recently, because I really prefer an emotional connection and simply didn't have time/energy (covid didn't help!). This year, I committed to pursuing other relationships, but I wasn't sure if I was fully poly or just open to other connections. Went on a couple of dates, which were fine, but didn't make a connection (though the first person actually wants to try again; I might because both of us were at a weird place, and she was my first date, which meant I was nervous).
However, the third time was the charm! I met someone and connected very quickly. In fact, both of us checked to make sure there wasn't a problematic dependency/attachment thing going on, but neither of us feels anything but openness, with no dependence. We both have other partners and are not desperate for connection or anything. It just happened, as things do. In any case, both of us are feeling love for each other and for our other partners. I can't speak for her, but for me, it's actually enhanced my feelings towards my more long term partner.
I'm married, and she considers her partner to be a top priority as well, which creates those natural hierarchies that so many poly-related books discuss. Even so, both our partners are very supportive and it hasn't been a problem (so far!). Even so, roadblocks and issues pop up in most relationships. So, I thought joining a site like this would be a good idea, for those times when I need support from more experienced people in the Poly community.
However, the third time was the charm! I met someone and connected very quickly. In fact, both of us checked to make sure there wasn't a problematic dependency/attachment thing going on, but neither of us feels anything but openness, with no dependence. We both have other partners and are not desperate for connection or anything. It just happened, as things do. In any case, both of us are feeling love for each other and for our other partners. I can't speak for her, but for me, it's actually enhanced my feelings towards my more long term partner.
I'm married, and she considers her partner to be a top priority as well, which creates those natural hierarchies that so many poly-related books discuss. Even so, both our partners are very supportive and it hasn't been a problem (so far!). Even so, roadblocks and issues pop up in most relationships. So, I thought joining a site like this would be a good idea, for those times when I need support from more experienced people in the Poly community.
