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[Magdlyn]

Yesterday I caught up on laundry, things Pixi and I wore while I was away. And towels. Tons of towels. I was behind on doing those.

Also, I colored Pixi's hair. She's naturally a medium brown with red highlights, but she keeps it colored red. Strawberry blonde in summer, auburn in winter. (She's got very fair skin which freckles, so red hair looks natural on her.) I remember when I was doing chemo, coloring her hair was too tiring for me, so she got my son to do it. (She can't do it herself because of her ability issues with her arms.) But yesterday I did it, and it was a breeze. Which goes to show how weak I was on the chemo. And now, what with all the exercising, I am strong like bull.

I also trimmed her hair some. I just blunt cut it. I need to go back and layer it out. But we ran out of time to finish the hair cut because she was going to her bf's for their usual Wednesday night, and I was going to swim.

So nice to be back in the pool. Oddly, I didn't swim in Florida! There was a big storm north of Florida (a foot or more of snow in Asheville NC), and while the area I was in didn't get rain, the surf was very rough. I didn't dare risk actually swimming in it, because of my iffy back. We did wade though. And when I tried to go in the pool at the hotel, it was unheated and SO cold. They'd had nights in the high 40s already, so pool water gets damn cold. The ocean was warmer.

My bestie who came to Florida lives right in the Asheville area. She had planned to go home on Sunday, but ended up not being able to go home til Wednesday! She visited another Florida friend Monday and spent the night at her place, and then on Tuesday night got a hotel room near the airport. She might have stayed at my sister's that night, but we weren't sure if my sister's husband was getting released from the hospital or not, and our friend sure didn't want to be around if he did get home.

And I also heard from Ravi and some more from BigGuy yesterday. Ravi appreciated the pix, was glad I had fun... he said sorry for not getting back to me sooner, but the previous day had been his and his wife's 6th wedding anniversary, so he made her breakfast in bed, an afternoon movie out, and dinner too. We didn't plan our next date yet. I feel it's more important to catch up with Pixi and BigGuy.

BigGuy and I might get together on Sunday. He thinks he can get away from the wife and kids. We're starting to plan our activities... and we talked a little about his other gf and our possible 3way. Maybe that can happen in January.

Saturday afternoon our friend T is having his annual cookie swap party. He has certain friends that always come, but this year Pixi and I invited more of our own friends, and also Pixi's bf, which T is fine with. Our closest friends whom we invited to Thanksgiving are all invited (except for my son, we'll next see him at Xmas). Pixi and I plan to make baklava. We made it once before a few years ago, and it came out great. It's a dessert her Greek aunts made for every holiday. It's not easy to make, but it's a fun thing to do together.

I only minimally chatted with my sister yesterday. I wanted to give her a break after our visit, where we did so much talking about her husband and her enabling and all that... apparently she had the day to herself yesterday, but today she finally goes back to work, at least for a few hours, and her husband is getting released from the crisis ward at the hospital. Ugh. Now she needs to plan getting him to a partial hospitalization program, for ongoing therapy. He's so resistant to treatment though. I dread the idea of her getting him to go every day.

 

[MeeraReed]

But yesterday I did it, and it was a breeze. Which goes to show how weak I was on the chemo. And now, what with all the exercising, I am strong like bull.

LOL, I know it's just a typo, but I am hearing that last phrase with an Eastern European accent!

Magdlyn, I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better! May you always be strong like bull!

 

[Magdlyn]

LOL, I know it's just a typo, but I am hearing that last phrase with an Eastern European accent!

Magdlyn, I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better! May you always be strong like bull!

hehe it wasn't a typo. I do say it with that accent!

Thanks for the warm wishes!

Yesterday I went and did my water exercise at noon, to get ready for the cookie orgy later.

We had a great time at the cookie swap party last night. We carpooled with a couple friends from our town to T's apartment in Worcester. We got there 2 hours after the open house started, so we were part of the second round of guests. We stayed from about 5:30-9. Our baklava was much praised. But there were about a dozen other kinds of cookies. All were wonderful. Such a feast! And T eventually brought out a lot of cheeses and crackers too, for us latecomers, so we benefited from late arrival! There's never any booze or weed at T's parties, since he's not into that. But we smoked up with our friends in the car on the way there, hehe. And we had delicious chai at the party.

Tonight BigGuy is coming over at 4. We will go to Savers, then to the grocery store for ingredients for dinner. He wants to cook together in Pyrex! What a guy. Also, he's been wanting to drink Sangria with me, it's his favorite drink. So we've got a lovely afternoon/evening planned. I'm so excited.

Pixi was too tired after the party to go to her bf's, plus it just got too late. She'll go today. Her wrists are still bothering her. Bad. Maybe carpal tunnel? Her bones are all messed up, she was born that way. The older she gets the worse pain she's in. None of her regular meds help much. Alcohol and cannabis help some. Luckily she's cute when she's drunk.

On Friday she had a dr appointment at our clinic in Boston. For a physical. Her wrists hurt too much to drive so I arranged things so I could drive her. Well, we get there and the receptionist said, we tried to call you, the dr went home sick. Then Pixi checked her phone and sure enough, there was a call that came in as we were getting ready to get out of the house, and she hadn't seen it. Argh. What a pita. It's a 45 minute drive with no traffic, and there's almost always traffic. So we made the best of it and went to Boston Beerworks right in the shadow of Fenway Park, a few blocks down Yawkey Way. It turned into a fun date. We shared our foods: duck spring rolls, buffalo wings, lamb burrito, and 2 kinds of potatoes: poutine, and roasted potatoes flavored with sour cream and chives. And of course, we each had a big fresh brewed IPA. So delish. And Pixi is such good company.

 

[Magdlyn]

My last date with BigGuy was again, wonderful. We are feeling more and more comfortable with each other.

He told me he needed hugs when he got here because he'd kinda broken up with his gf. Not sure if it was that day or the day before, but very recently. He was getting concerned with her becoming very dependent on him, calling him multiple times a day, and having issues with her other partner, who was apparently becoming abusive. And her last 2 partners/Dommes were also eventually abusive to her. So he's concerned about the bad choices she makes in partners and doesn't feel comfortable with her now... He said they are taking a break in communicating until the New Year, and he wants her to get help... but she seems to be hinting at hurting herself, blech! He really likes her in many ways but apparently this is getting weird.

I didn't want to know too much about it all, since it's kind of intimate info. But I know he's new to poly and maybe doesn't have too many people to talk to about a breakup in his network. So I let him vent some, but then we were able to move on to the fun plans we'd made. The shopping (we both got some Xmas gifts for our families), the cooking, the Sangria concoctions. He brought a white and a red.

And then the sexy time. He hadn't instigated any plans ahead of time, but it turned out he had plans for certain toys. No role playing this time, just a million intense orgasms for me. Whew! Wow. So great. I feel really lucky to have met this guy. (I hope it keeps being great even as NRE starts to fade. *fingerscrossed*) We checked in with each other on text the next 2 days after our date, which I liked very much.

Tomorrow is Yule, which is an important holiday for pagans like me. Normally I invite a friend or two over for the ritual but we've been so busy, I told Pixi I wanted to keep it simple. I bet BigGuy would be interested in the pagan ritual. I told him about it the other night. He loves learning about alternative religions and myths and stuff. But I've had Kahlo and Punk come to Yules in the past, and they're not in my life anymore, so I don't wanna jinx it with BigGuy lol!

So Pixi and I will do Yule kinda early in the evening, have a fire, eat food, then she'll go to her bf's for a couple nights. On Sunday he's leaving to go see 3 branches of his family Christmas week, in 3 states!

 

[Magdlyn]

Yule on the 21st was wonderful, just the 2 of us. It was so intimate, relaxing and centering, cozy and bonding. We did some different activities than in other years, some the same. Really, Yule is always a bit different, depending on who is here, whether they are pagan, etc. Pixi was going to go to her bf's afterwards, but she was too into the Yule spell to leave me. She went the next day for a couple nights, and I enjoyed me time, the calm before the Xmas storm, very much.

After the intensely spiritual experience of Yule, actual secular Christmas is busy busy and more shallow. We've had my son here since Dec 24. We cooked with him on Xmas Eve, as usual (roast beef and homemade spanakopita). We ate in the living room by the fire. We exchanged presents on Xmas morning. And also did the Xmas Day movie in a theater thing, with Asian dinner out, as usual. But there were hassles with the movie... I'd ordered 5 tickets for us and my son and 2 friends, on the movie theater website, but somehow got directed to a different AMC theater when I purchased them, than the one I thought I was ordering from. And didn't realize it when my tix got texted to me. So we all got there at 3:30 for a 4:00 movie and after much confusion lasting about 15 minutes, found out our tickets were for a different theater a half hour away from where we were. We raced over there, in 2 cars, but it had started 10 minutes earlier, so we finally made a decision to go to dinner and come back for the 7:10 movie. The woman at the box office said she'd just wave us in.

And so eventually it all did work out. We had a nice dinner, but it wasn't as relaxing as it should have been since I was stressed about getting back to the theater in time, and wondering whether they'd really let us into the 7:10 show. But they did. We saw Mary Poppins Comes Back, and it was great. Magical, candy colored, good acting. Lots of fun. All's well that ends well.

Afterwards we drove to this one house my neighbor had told me about, to see their extravagant decorations. One of our friends came back to our house and spent more time here. We ended up sitting one of her dogs overnight and most of the next day, so she could drive to a disc golf place the next day with her younger dog. When she got back in the evening, she stayed for dinner we cooked. It was steaks that night.

All the driving around and movie stress wasn't good for my messed up neck though, so it's been extra painful ever since. Plus I didnt have time to get to the gym for 10 days. I finally went and did my water exercise and Jacuzzi yesterday and it helped some. It felt so great to stretch and move. My neck got sore again in the evening, but it doesn't feel as tight. I worked out some of the kinks.

Since Xmas, my son is still with us, and he and Pixi have been playing video games a lot as usual. Pixi's bf has been out of town. We had a friend over last night for eating pizza and playing a new card game. Today I am taking my son home. And Pixi will go spend Monday night and Tuesday night with her bf.

Meanwhile, I've been contacted by 2 new guys on OK Cupid. I actually made time to sit down and look for my new messages this week. I just really need more sex. Pixi's wrists have been painful all month. Maybe carpal tunnel. Something to do with her messed up shoulders and wrist bones. So she's kind of been off sex. And I haven't seen BigGuy in a couple weeks. I might see him Wednesday. But I'm horneee!

So, one of the new guys is very sexual. He is intense. He has seen my OK Cupid profile, and I'm pretty open about my high sex drive in my questions and answers. And he's also seen my Fetlife profile, which lists my kinks. He says we've spoken before in previous years, and I've turned him down... I don't really remember. But this time, I am taking more interest. We are meeting tonight. I think he will be a good sex partner, play-partner boy toy type. I hope he will be satisfying in between more real boyfriend type dates with BigGuy, and when Pixi is in one of her sex slumps, like now. He's 38, fit, an electrical engineer, a youth hockey coach. We've talked about sex a lot the past 3 days, and shared some slightly naughty pix. It's been hot. He's been begging to come over, but I keep telling him it's a no go as long as my son is here!

I've heard hardly nothing from Ravi since our 4th date (first sex date). I guess the sex didn't make him anymore attached to me! He's always so busy with family and friends and parties and trips. I am just not feeling it. He seemed so into poly at first, but now I just feel like an afterthought, a "piece on the side," as usually seems to happen with Indian guys. Bleh This is not "polyamory." We've barely texted in weeks. Much less gotten together again.

And the other new OKC guy, he's messaged me a bit sporadically... he's not pursuing me the way I like, the way the sexual boytoy potential guy has been. He's 56, married, poly, but just hasn't bothered to respond to my last text for 2 or 3 days! I told him I wasn't free to have a date til this coming week, but that doesn't mean he doesn't need to answer texts and get acquainted that way. Pfft.

So tonight, after I drive my son home, I'm meeting the youngish horny new guy for a drink, and as long as he doesn't seem too sketchy, I'll probably bring him back here for kinky sex. I hope it works out. He lives pretty nearby and seems to come through my town a lot for his work and coaching job. He said he's open for anything from a 15 minute quickie to a 5 hour date with sex, nap, sex, and watch a movie kind of thing. He said he's too busy to be a "real boyfriend," but since I've already got Pixi and BigGuy for "realness," a boytoy could fill in, in between.

 

[Magdlyn]

Well, oddly, the date with the new guy didn't materialize. He's been pursuing me hotly for several days. He kept begging to meet me, to come over here and do sex things with me. I kept telling him I can't, I've got a house guest, my son! Sheesh.

So yesterday morning just before noon, he messaged me asking if we could meet now. I said, no, I'd told you I could see you in the evening. (I looked up our text thread and I saw I'd said "evening" just above, in my last words the previous night.)

He was thinking we could meet just then. I said, no, I am bringing my son home and I can probably meet you at 4. So he said, he was going to watch the Patriots game at 1, and after that, had something going on down in Rhode Island. !!! (He texted me at noon when the all important football game started at 1?)

What the hell? It's like, when I was unavailable, he was constantly begging to get together, and now that I have free time, he's playing hard to get?

So, I said, oh well, OK, I'm free all day Monday and Tuesday, I'll even have the house to myself as Pixi will be at her bf's. Let me know what time you can get together. And then he said... nothing.

So after a few minutes, I posted "..." And he responded, he wasn't sure what time, he'd let me know. So I got mad. And he called me and we talked a couple minutes. And he said he'd been thinking about me constantly. Blah blah.

So, after our short phone call, he immediately texted me. "So mad. I'll make it up to you. "

I said, "You seem like a spontaneous person. I either meet you NOW, or not at all."

That kind of spontaneity might work... but it's not my ideal. I do have 2 other partners, friends, gym, house work, health issues. Like most people, I have a life! I remember that very young BoyToy I had when I was new to poly was like this. And a lot of 20somethings that have tried to date me are like this. Horny young men, no planning ahead, find a free few hours, want sex, want it now.

But this guy is 38. Or at least he says he is. And he has 2 jobs, or so he says. But it still seems he wants to see me when he happens to be driving past my town on his way to and from his jobs. All last minute, "I'm in the area," kinda thing. Hmph.

So, anyway. I did take my son home yesterday. I was home at 5. We had our house back to ourselves! Pixi and I made dinner and had a cozy time beginning to watch the 2nd season of the Amazon show, The Marvelous Mrs Maisel, which has been out for a while, but we'd been too busy to watch. We watched 2 episodes.

Then Pixi told me she'd told her bf I was going to have a date that night, and she was going to give me space, and go to his place, and he was expecting her to come over. But since I did NOT have a date, she was tempted to just stay home and chill with me, after our busy holiday week with so much socializing. But I encouraged her to go... her bf hadn't seen her at all in a week and was missing her. So I helped her get ready to go. Filled her medications calendar, did her hair, she got dressed and packed, and left around 10PM.

Now, I'm on my own. It's 10:45 am and I haven't heard a thing from new guy! I am guessing he's got New Year's Eve plans for today/tonight, and maybe planning on a hangover tomorrow. But who knows... I'm trying to keep an open mind. I think he'd be a fun sex partner. But that won't matter if he's too sketchy or flaky to make plans, ever, and just wants me to be at his beck and call when he's in the mood and in the neighborhood.

I was kinda bummed out last night about all this, but it's OK. I am loving having the house to myself for a couple days, and no plans except to please myself. I think I'll watch some Twilight Zone marathon. Go get some booze. Maybe make a baklava by myself, since we've been practicing up using phyllo dough.

 

[Magdlyn]

I've been enjoying my me-time very much. Catching up on the never ending dishes and laundry. I even made a good start yesterday on taking down Xmas decorations. I just feel over the whole holiday season. I think traveling to Florida added to the holiday spirit and now I'm ready to get back to normal life goddammit!

Pixi texted me on Monday from her bf's, to say she was missing me so much, she had a tearful break down! She and her bf were doing some bondage, and she had to be asked to be released because she couldn't stop thinking about me, and was crying. So we chatted some, and I said, well, I'm only 15 minutes away, you can always pop home! But she calmed down and felt better on Tuesday. She'll be home today, Wednesday.

She's an introvert and just needs some quiet downtime with me, I think.

I was hoping to see BigGuy today... he was trying to arrange things with his kids and his ex, and his wife... but it seems he couldn't make it happen. Now we are hoping he can get away on Thursday, tomorrow. Gah, I miss him so much. I'm also curious if he's been in touch with his other gf, who he supposedly at least took a break from until the new year.

But anyway, it's just as well if I don't see him til tomorrow, since today I can devote to Pixi, and also get to the gym pool for free swim time at 8:30pm.

I messaged that OKC guy around 5pm on New Year's Eve. I was texting all my friends happy new year, so I included him. After hotly pursuing me for days, I hadn't heard from him all day. So he said, he was sick, and tired, and "running around for this holiday." I said, sorry to hear you got sick, he didn't reply, so we left it at that. I think he's ghosting. Good riddance, I think he's a fucking flake. Also, I don't believe he's 38. His face pic looked very young (if it was his face). He looked more like 28 than 38, and he's sure acting like a 20something.

I also texted Ravi happy new year. He texted back on New Year's Day, happy new year. Nothing else. Is he ghosting too, after ardently dating me and finally having sex after a 4 date build up? We had sex for 2 hours... he seemed to enjoy himself, and the day after that, said he couldn't wait to see me again! Ha! Was he really so busy all December he couldn't get away even for a couple hours? Sheesh.

Meanwhile I haven't heard a thing from the other new OKC guy, even after I wished him Happy New Year. The hell?

Another 20something guy contacted me on Fetlife 2 days ago... he's a Dom, but he lives kinda too far, on the coast just south of Boston. That's 40 miles! It's gonna be close to an hour drive. Also, he says his interests are threeways or group sex, "creampie play," public play. I am not into any of that. Also, he wants an open relationship, and is only available on Tuesdays, his one day off a week! How in the hell is he going to have relationships with more than one woman, especially with one like me who's an hour drive away, with one day off a week? And how's he going to have bareback sex when he's seeing multiple people?

In his favor, he seems very smart, and works in robotics/artificial intelligence type field, apparently? And he's well spoken, has traveled a lot. He keeps asking me to text him (no, kid, I don't have kik or snapchat ).

Dating is so hard. I'm emotionally worn out from all the hassles. I need sex! I hope Pixi and I can have some good sex soon, and more than once. I hope BigGuy does make it here tomorrow and give me a million orgasms! At least I've had me-time to masturbate the last couple days.

 

[Vicki82]

I think it's so touching that Pixi was thinking of you so much, even at this duration of your relationship. It says a lot about your connection.

I read so many posts here and it seems like in a lot of ways people write, or at least how I interpret it, is that their primary relationship is lacking something or isn't as satisfying as they would like, or something of the like. Reading your posts gives me hope that it's possible to have a long lasting romantic and sexual connection with a primary partner while still directing energy to other relationships, too.

Hope you get to see BigGuy soon!

 

[Magdlyn]

I think it's so touching that Pixi was thinking of you so much, even at this duration of your relationship. It says a lot about your connection.

Thanks, Vicki. I am a very lucky woman. I was in a less than satisfactory marriage for 30 years... it was good in many ways, but he never fully accepted me and loved me for who I am. And I had a part in that, settling for someone who didn't understand or appreciate my bisexuality, kinky and poly nature. He was jealous and threatened by all of it. He was always trying to control me. Tamp me down.

"Love is better the second time around," for me!

Pixi got home yesterday and said her tears were triggered sentimentally by the new year... thinking back to how she lost her dog this year, and other things, not just me. She struggles with separation anxiety (big childhood losses still affecting her psyche) and so in her riled up state, she said she was even looking ahead to her summer camp job, dreading when she'd miss me and her bf! She told him that, and he said, "Well, I'm flattered but that's a bit extreme."

But so anxiety goes. Worrying needlessly about something that starts 6 months down the road!

I read so many posts here and it seems like in a lot of ways people write, or at least how I interpret it, is that their primary relationship is lacking something or isn't as satisfying as they would like, or something of the like. Reading your posts gives me hope that it's possible to have a long lasting romantic and sexual connection with a primary partner while still directing energy to other relationships, too.

Hope you get to see BigGuy soon!

Yeah. Well, her libido is lower than mine, and she isn't a man. So since I need sex, and love sex with men, (of course, emotional connection too, if I'm lucky, as I seem to be getting from BigGuy) she is lacking in those areas, you could say. Not the emotional connection, but the boy stuff.

Her anxiety issues do repress her libido. But we had a great reconnection yesterday, emotional, intellectual and sexual. Yum.

I am seeing BigGuy tonight! He should be here around 6:30. Can't wait! I guess Pixi will be here too, since she only just got home. But she is fine to go down to the rec room and entertain herself, while I host my guy. I've missed him a lot!

He's been going to the gym regularly the past month. He plays tennis on weekends, 2 leagues, but he wanted to get in even better shape. He does have a belly. Update, we just texted a bit, he's lost weight, he's doing mostly keto now.

I had a great workout last night myself. Been going to the gym since June. My leg muscles are like iron lol

That guy from Fetlife and I did text. I was just curious what his deal was, why he reached out to me. He said he is moving further north and west, in a month or 2, to be closer to his newish job. So he'll be only a half hour away from me, not an hour. That makes more sense!

And he answered my other questions. He uses safer sex with partners. He only goes bareback, he said, after knowing someone for years. It's odd he'd even mention creampies, then. *shrug*

I told him I'm more open to MFM threeways than FMF. (I'd had such a good experience of that with Punk and a boytoy one time...) But I guess I'd do it with a woman. After all, I was considering doing that with BigGuy's other gf, until their recent problems. I think I was turned off to FMF because I had some experiences with guys who weren't good at being the meat in a girl sandwich. But I do recall early in 2018 when I was seeing a poly Dom guy (I forget his nickname). I played him his other gf once, and it was fine. She was very into women, and he did a great job of pleasing us.

Anyway, this is all moot until (if and when) I get to know this guy better... Right now I am going to enjoy the holidays being over, so Pixi and I have more one on one time.

 

[Magdlyn]

Another great time with BigGuy. I just wish we'd had more time. He got here around 6:30 and left around 10:45. We had sexy times as well as dinner (I made a big salad and deviled eggs for his diet) (plus a frozen pizza for Pixi and me, though we had salad and eggs too lol).

Pixi stayed downstairs the whole time. She's really paranoid about being with my partners too much, after the non-consensual shit with Kahlo. I am sure BigGuy would never cross boundaries, he so kind and sweet. But it's nice too, to just have complete one on one time with him.

We fit in time for talking too. He was telling me about his childhood and teenager hood, in between living in the US and travels to Fiji, not feeling he fully fit in either place.

We did some sex, then dinner and conversation, then lots more sex. And I ended it with exposing him to the Nutcracker Ballet. Somehow that had never come across his radar. It's weird, because his father is a classical musician. His mom, being Fijian, must not have heard of it. So we watched some video. I also read a Golden Book version to him I'd found, and gave him the book to share with his 3 year old.

Prior to his arrival, I'd showered and put on this silky caftan I have. It's almost black, like a silvery charcoal, with "jewels" sewn on around the neckline. Pixi kept exclaiming how pretty and witchy I looked, and then said she'd wanted to jump me all day, but was holding off so I didn't get worn out before BigGuy came. But of course, I said, go ahead and jump me. So we fooled around a little.

BigGuy told me how pretty I looked too.

After he left I rested a little, then washed up and went and watched a show with Pixi, and then I realized she was still in the mood for sex, and I was more than happy to play. We did some kinky stuff. Mmm. It was almost 2am by the time I went to bed.

Pixi has been resting her sore wrists all week. Her bf taped them up and wouldnt let her lift a finger when she was there. I've done all the cooking and washing up all week. Last night she finally felt well enough to do some housework, reorganizing and decluttering in our storage room.

Today we are going to make onion soup. We had the idea because we had a lot of au jus liquid left from the Xmas roast beef meal. I bought a ton of onions yesterday, they need to cook on really low heat for a couple hours. Also got a baguette and cheeses for on top.

Oh, that sketchy guy that was bugging me all last weekend, finally got back in touch yesterday, saying he wanted to get together today. Well, I'd decided to let that idea go. I decided just to not respond. I'm ghosting. He's just too weird. I'm afraid if I say anything, he'll get mean.

The other young guy from Fetlife didn't talk to me all day yesterday... I don't know what his deal is.

Of course now that I've had good active kinky sex with both my current partners, I'm not to eager to chat anyone else up. At least for now!

 

[Magdlyn]

What a difference a day makes...

The new Fetlife guy, we had a date on Saturday, 2 days ago. I will describe it in full, but...

First, I had a nice couple days with Pixi, still reconnecting between the holidays busyness, and her reconnecting with her bf too! We are having to spend "quality time" when we can, since quantity has been lacking lately in our social world/whirl. We made onion soup together from scratch Friday night, and watched Bandersnatch, this Netflix interactive movie/game. Kinda quirky and fun. Takes place in the 80s, so it reminded us of Stranger Things a bit, but more adult. Saturday night after I left for my dinner date with new Fetlife guy, Pixi went to her bf's for the weekend.

... Before I describe that date, I need to update on Ravi too. I think I said here I wished him Happy New Year when I was texting a lot of friends on New Year's Eve. And he did write happy new year to me, on new year's day. And nothing else. 2 days later, I said, So... I guess we're over? And now, 2 or three days after that, no response even to that! Sheesh. Rude.

So odd, how he pursued me, dated me 4 times, finally deep kissed me on the 4th date, we had sex on the 5th date. 2 hours of sex! And the next day he told me he couldn't wait to see me again. Then the holidays happened. We did text ever so briefly around the solstice, he indicated he was going to NYC for Xmas to see some cousins. And now... he won't even talk to me. Won't even say why he changed his mind. I mean, I was never crazy about the guy, he didn't really float my boat. I just kinda liked him. But he seemed into me, as his first foray into poly. Seemed to want to be respectful and ethical. So much for open and honest communication! Feh!

I told BigGuy about it last night in text, and he said, maybe there's trouble at home. I can't think of a better explanation than that. That maybe Ravi's wife freaked out when he and I finally had sex, and now he's not even "allowed" to talk to me? To even properly break up with me? Oh well. One of life's mysteries.

 

[Magdlyn]

Moving on... so Fetlife guy (who I hope will need a nickname soon, maybe after a second date), he and I had a first date on Saturday. He was very very eager to meet me. He's been very involved in this demanding career for a few years, and seems hasn't had much time for relationships or sex. And his first contact with me on Fet was titled, "You turn me on intellectually." Being sapiosexual, of course this was interesting to me. But he's also kinky, considers himself a Dom. And that is great, since Pixi and BigGuy are more on the sub side. Although they both can Top me when the moods strikes, I've been wanting an actual dominant. Bad.

So we met at my local Asian restaurant at 5:30. He said, he'd prefer a quiet place, so rather than my local pub, we went there. This place has a big hibachi area, and then a side room for non-hibachi dining. This room has regular tables, and also has 4 booths that have sliding shoji doors where you can really be private. I told him that before we met. So he got there first, and got a booth, and when I arrived a few minutes later, he stood up and hugged me and kissed me on the cheek. Or was it the mouth? Somewhere in between? Definitely friendly lol

He said the waitress had told him about the doors and how you can even adjust the temperature and dim the lights in the booth. So after we ordered food and drinks, and our drinks came, I said, go ahead and slide the doors shut. He did, and left it open just a foot or two on one side. It immediately got quieter in our booth, easy to hear each other talk. And yes, intimate, romantic, even sexy.

He took the opportunity with our privacy, after food came, to occasionally take my hands across the table, kissed my hand a couple times, and one time he half stood up and leaned over the table and gently kissed my mouth! I was enjoying his courtly behavior. He's half Spanish and it just all had an old fashioned romantic feeling.



So, he told me right off more about his job. He'd been rather mysterious about it in texting. It's very high tech cutting edge; there are proprietary secrets he can't even talk about, but he told me what he could. And then he told me about the confusion about his kink interests. The threesome ideas and the "creampie" things are more what kind of porn he enjoys, that is, fantasies, not requirements. Or maybe things he'd do down the road with a partner, but not right off the bat. I said, OK, well, fantasies are one thing, reality is another. Like in poly. Feeling attracted to more than one person, for example, is common enough. Actually making poly work ethically, is different. He very politely and sincerely asked me questions about my boundaries, agreements, scheduling with Pixi, and all that stuff.

We also talked about my past, my work in the past in lactation support, my life with Pixi since my marriage broke up, a bit about exes of his, families, places we've lived, etc., etc. Conversation just flowed.

Btw, he's quite young, a boy genius. Only 28. Looks something like Lin Manuel Miranda. Yum. Very interesting young man. Doing very well in his career. He's single, no kids. He talked about further dates. How he'd love to see me 2 or 3 times a week! Just what I've been wanting. He'd see me on his day off, Tuesday, and also be able to see me in the evenings on work days! Well well well. That sure ticked my boxes. Hot dates several times a week, with a cute horny fascinating guy, who is super smart, fun to talk to, and romantic? Well, thanks, universe! Don't mind if I do!

Then we talked about theology, Egyptian, Sumerian, then space travel, aliens and our government and what they may know and not tell the public, and what not... I talked about kitchen table poly as Pixi and my ideal, but how Kahlo broke the boundaries, and how Pixi's bf is introverted and it's been slow getting to meet and know him. He expressed an interest in meeting both of them, though. Completely understood Pixi is off limits for anything physical.

He was very interested in my views. And vice versa. Things went on, talk was easy, lots of eye contact, there was a definite big old click between us. "Schwing!"

He popped out of our booth to use the restroom after we'd done eating. I took the time to text Pixi that things were going well. She knew I had good feelings about this guy before the date and was considering taking him home if dinner went well.

After he paid the check, he was getting into his jacket, and then he again took my hand and kissed it and said, "Thanks so much for coming out to meet me!!" He was being a gentleman. There was absolutely no pressure, no, "So now what?" Of course, we'd texted about sex before we met. I hadn't guaranteed we'd go back to my place after dinner, though that is what he wanted for sure. Well, I liked him so much, even though it isn't my usual mode of operations, I asked him to come back with me. Big smiles from him.

[He said towards the end of dinner, did I see Vans when you got here? Are you wearing Vans? I said yes. (Retro 80s black and white checked slip-on sneakers, you know?) He said he'd loved those in middle school. Later he again said, "You had me with those Vans." hehe]

He followed me home. I live like 5 minutes away from the restaurant. I went to the bathroom and when i came back, he said how nice and calming my house was, he liked it. Then I sat down next to him on the couch, and he immediately started kissing me. Things got hot. He told me to get on his lap, so I straddled him (and his hard cock, oh yes). Making out was excellent, there was feeling of my breasts, bra opened, shirt came off, breasts nuzzled. He was in charge and it was SO awesome. I was loving it.

He started sliding down my pants, and so I suggested just moving to the bedroom. And we had sex and it was really good, kinky as hell, definitely D/s. No toys used, but him in charge, some nice spanking as well as oral and fucking. I won't say it was perfect, first time sex hardly ever is... he seemed unaware I could've cum another 5 or 10 times lol. I need to explain about my capacity for orgasms before next time. I did cum about 5 or 6 times. He came twice. But sadly, around 8:30, he said he needed to get going. Of course, he did have an hour drive and early work the next day. Yes, he works 6 days a week.

He was holding me in bed. He told me I had,"Kind eyes. I like them. Very pretty." He stroked my hair a lot. Gave me lots of cuddles and little kisses. I think I felt him starting to harden again (god it's been a long time since I've been with such a youngster!), but he tore himself out of bed.

As he was dressing, I was lounging on the bed, and he kept glancing at me spread out there. Smiling. Talking. I got up to walk him out, he grabbed me for last kisses. As he departed, he said, "See you soon, sweetheart." *swoon*

Oh man, my NRE is pretty intense. Pixi hasn't been home yet. So I spent Saturday and Sunday nights sleeping alone. Not sleeping well! Sleeping lightly, waking early. I wonder if this is really going to work. He sure seemed extremely eager to make this a regular thing.

So, last night, I was texting BigGuy. He had all the kids there, but was able to answer me with gaps in between texts. I hadn't had a chance on our last date to ask him about his (ex?) gf who had boundary issues. We'd talked of other things and had lots of sex on our date, and couldn't cover everything!

He had indeed gone no contact for about 2 weeks, until New Years. They've been talking some since, but he said she needs to do a lot of work on herself, and he doesn't seem to trust her. I didn't ask for more details. Mainly I wanted to know if he'd still be seeing her, if she'd be part of time he needed to plan for dates. It seems not!

Then I told him about the new guy. He said it sounded "Awesome." Then I told him new guy says he can be available 2 or 3 times a week. BigGuy said, wow, is he local? I said, no, he's on the South Shore now, but will be moving closer to his job (and me) soon. BigGuy didn't comment after that. I suspect he's a little envious or something, maybe?

But of course, as a mature adult (heh) despite my feelings for new guy, and his apparent approval of me, it's early days yet. We shall see how it all really unfolds. This insecurity plus infatuation-- all a part of NRE.

 

[YouAreHere]

Well, yay!!
After getting through the cereal bowl of nuts and flakes, of course. The prize at the end of the box?

Glad you and Pixi got time to reconnect. It'll be nice to recover from the holiday whirlwind.

Oh, and Bandersnatch was such a good watch. I spent a couple sessions on it.

 

[LibertyBelle]

Magdlyn, you are a bada$s! I don't even have the confidence to date people around my age and look at you go with your younger guy. You are my new hero!! Plus, your retelling of the night was hot, jus sayin'.

 

[Evie]

Wow, you make 28 y/os seem like a good idea!

I'm glad you've found a compatible d-type. They're pretty rare.

 

[Vicki82]

I hope you get to ride that NRE for a while! Sounds like an awesome date.

 

[powerpuffgrl1969]

Awesome update!

 

[Magdlyn]

Well, yay!!
After getting through the cereal bowl of nuts and flakes, of course. The prize at the end of the box?

Glad you and Pixi got time to reconnect. It'll be nice to recover from the holiday whirlwind.

Oh, and Bandersnatch was such a good watch. I spent a couple sessions on it.

Magdlyn, you are a bada$s! I don't even have the confidence to date people around my age and look at you go with your younger guy. You are my new hero!! Plus, your retelling of the night was hot, jus sayin'.

Wow, you make 28 y/os seem like a good idea!

I'm glad you've found a compatible d-type. They're pretty rare.

I hope you get to ride that NRE for a while! Sounds like an awesome date.

Awesome update!

Thanks, cheerleaders!

Unfortunately I've barely heard from him since our date. No plans made. So, maybe he just needed a good fuck, and all this stuff about 3 times a week was just his dick talking.

I'm not writing him off. He was very clear about how demanding his career is. So I'd kind of taken the 2 or 3 times a week thing with a grain of salt. I've texted him briefly a few times to show my interest. He responded once. So, ball's in his court.

I also finally texted Ravi, just to tell him how tacky it was to ghost on me, and so not what I expected considering how respectful he'd been up til our first sex date.

WTF? Why are men so fucking stupid?

At least I've still got BigGuy. We text about every other day. And I hope he can make it to this big local BDSM event held every year in New England. It's coming up next month. I've been 3 times with Pixi (and a bf joined me one year too). Pixi's bf wants to go too. You can go 3 days, Friday night, Saturday, into Sunday til 4PM. One time we went and got a hotel room for 2 nights, but other times we've just gone on Saturday. I hope BigGuy can get away for it. He's interested, but we'll see if he can arrange things with the wife and the ex wife and all the kids and their schedules... fingers crossed.

 

[Magdlyn]

Oh my god I just spent an hour updating my blog and my finger slipped and I closed the tab and lost everything.

Long story short, I finally heard from Ravi, I expressed my frustration, he condescended to me, and lamely mansplained. I feel I got closure, he heard my rant, I'm done! I basically went all New York on him, verbally gave him the finger, the arrogant privileged SOB.

 

[Magdlyn]

I'm still feeling good about letting Ravi know I didn't appreciate him ignoring me for over a month. I was never crazy about him, and now I've gotten a bit of closure and I'm really done.

As I wrote in that post I lost, he was basically ignoring me all December. He barely responded to any of my attempts to connect in text. He didn't respond at all on Jan 5 when I said, so I guess we're done? Turns out he was in India for a week or so this month. His parents had just completed a 2 month US visit, but his dad got sick when they got home, and was hospitalized. So Ravi flew over there. And he said he didn't see my text til he got back, on Saturday. Or so he says. But his dad getting sick, and the holidays, doesn't excuse him stopping contact. I had holidays, I had an ill relative and flew to Florida to help. That didn't stop ME from trying to stay in touch! He easily could have texted me, said he missed me, told me he had to go to India, and would get in touch when he got back. But no, he couldn't be bothered!

I haven't heard from the 27 year old since our date. Except for one response I got to one of my texts to him, just kind of random 2 minute conversation about a TV show we'd discussed on our date. No texts to check in with me, no offers to see me again.

I texted him earlier today to ask what happened to him. But I doubt I'll hear back, because I checked his Fetlife profile just now. I see he's been on there as recently as a few hours ago, friending and following local women like crazy. I think he was quite new to Fet when he contacted me, or had just rejoined, and now he's got 11 friends and is following 14. Women subs, bottoms, brats, hotwives, from 18-43. And one male. And I see that male is friends with one of the women he friended, so I am guessing he's been chatting away with others at the very least, if not dating and fucking away.

Attractive doms or tops are, of course, in high demand, and he's got a bigger than average dick, to boot. I'm just going to assume he's already had a few other women since our date 9 days ago. So I'm just going to write him off. Oh well, it was a fun date. But he's a fake. A liar ("I want to see you 2 or 3 times a week!"). But the truth apparently is, he's just going around fucking as many women as he can get, with that charm and romantic way he has.

Not what I'm looking for, to say the least.

I'm so tired of this dating bs. I think I'll take a break. I'm exhausted emotionally. I'll just keep getting Pixi to have sex with me. She's been in the mood lately, which is great.

I asked her last week to use the strap-on on me. It's a little dysphoric for her, but getting penetrated is really important to me. She's not so good with her fingers, because of her disabilities. She isn't that into giving me oral, and I prefer penetration to oral anyway. She is good with her feet or knees, pressing on my vulva and clit. But I need penetration too. That's what I get from men, from their penises or fingers. Some like to use hand held toys on me too. BigGuy does. That makes me the most satisfied. I think most women are into penetration. I feel kinda bad asking Pixi to use the strap-on... but lately her wrists have been hurting, so even using a hand held toy on me is too much for her. So basically the strap-on is the only option!

Such is a sex life with a transwoman with arm disabilities.