Short Version: My husband, B, and I have been married a year and a half. I expressed interest in an open relationship/ possibly poly before we got married. B said he was okay with it. Started talking to S, told B. B changed his mind about poly and had epic meltdown.
Months of ups and downs, B goes from being okay with it to threatening to leave the marriage. Counseling. Ultimately, he had a job/training opportunity on the other side of the country for about 2-3 months. We decided this would be my "freedom time" to explore and we would discuss the relationship at the conclusion and see where we're at.
Had an amazing time with S over the last couple months. We are super compatible. But difficult because S is not poly, and sometimes this created tension in the relationship. We never said "I love you" but S said to me "I know you love me, and part of me has those feelings too." Which is true, I think I've loved him for some time. We have shared an extremely intimate, vulnerable and precious partnership.
For reasons I can't disclose, B got a job opportunity where we cannot be in a poly lifestyle. I broke up with S so B could get the job. I'm also moving away for my job, so we knew the relationship with S would end eventually... but I ended it sooner than the move.
It's been a week and a half, and I really really miss S. Like crazy miss him. I can't remember missing someone the way I miss him. It distracts me during the day. I feel like a piece of me is missing. It's been a while since I've been party to a break-up and I'm wondering if this is normal break up emotions and they will fade over time or if I've made a mistake. How can I tell? I really want to see S once more before I leave to say goodbye but I also think this might be a really bad idea, and will only hurt him. Any advice?
Nel
Months of ups and downs, B goes from being okay with it to threatening to leave the marriage. Counseling. Ultimately, he had a job/training opportunity on the other side of the country for about 2-3 months. We decided this would be my "freedom time" to explore and we would discuss the relationship at the conclusion and see where we're at.
Had an amazing time with S over the last couple months. We are super compatible. But difficult because S is not poly, and sometimes this created tension in the relationship. We never said "I love you" but S said to me "I know you love me, and part of me has those feelings too." Which is true, I think I've loved him for some time. We have shared an extremely intimate, vulnerable and precious partnership.
For reasons I can't disclose, B got a job opportunity where we cannot be in a poly lifestyle. I broke up with S so B could get the job. I'm also moving away for my job, so we knew the relationship with S would end eventually... but I ended it sooner than the move.
It's been a week and a half, and I really really miss S. Like crazy miss him. I can't remember missing someone the way I miss him. It distracts me during the day. I feel like a piece of me is missing. It's been a while since I've been party to a break-up and I'm wondering if this is normal break up emotions and they will fade over time or if I've made a mistake. How can I tell? I really want to see S once more before I leave to say goodbye but I also think this might be a really bad idea, and will only hurt him. Any advice?
Nel
