POLL: Bedsheets and multiple partlerns

Can i expect my BF to change sheets after another lover has spent the night

  • This ask seems a bit unreasonable/unrealistic

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    23
  • Poll closed .

Mollykins

New member
POLL: Is it an uncommon ask to change bed sheet between partners?

I had a partner who would sometimes have several woman on a given week for overnights but only changes his sheets probably once every 2weeks. I asked if he would please change the sheets before i spent the night and i always felt like i was putting him out (he said having an in-unit W/D would make it easier to do more often - i said get multiple sets of sheets!!!).

What’s everyone else’s view on this?

I asked him about his other partners having this issue and he said they know when he has dates (ie knee someone spent the night, the night before) and it’s never come up - i would think they prob just assume he’s changed them? Is my ask atypical?!??
 
Hi Mollykins,

Personally I am indifferent about whether the sheets get changed, but I know that for others this is an issue. I think it is fine to ask your partner to change the sheets before you sleep in them. Of course he does have the option of deciding that this is an area of incompatibility, if it's something he's not willing to do. Every partner is different.

I voted for the second option in your poll.
Sincerely,
Kevin T.
 
Hi Mollykins!

I'd say there are two factors for me currently, having 2 live in partners.

How long have the sheets been on the bed? Even if I'm the only one in them I go no longer than 2 weeks between washes. If they've been made dirty by sex stuff then I just change them.

Since I'm in charge of laundry, any time someone B oor Z may take to bed comes over I change the sheets if sex has been had. The only time I wouldn't if it was just him sleeping in the bed, and they had been changed within 1 week.

I don't think it's unreasonable, since sheets should be changed for cleanliness every 2 weeks and adults usually have more than 1 set.
 
We're a "change the sheets" household.
 
I always change sheets between partners. I feel that it's respectful.
 
I think a lot depends on how messy your sex is....

With condoms and clean bodies, I honestly don’t see the purpose of changing sheets between every partner. Unless,
of course, you actually see fluids on them.

But the two partners that I have sex with most often also have had sex with each other....so that is part of the equation....if I am thinking about it carefully yeah, I usually change the sheets if Whiskers is coming over, even if I don’t bother between Glasses and Ponytail.
 
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If I know I'm going to have company and it's been more than a couple of days since I last changed the sheets I'll change them again even if it's only me who's been sleeping in them.
 
We change every other week.
When she has her period more often when there is blood on the sheets.
Personally I like clean sheets it just feels good.
Blankets get washed every season.
 
I don’t change the sheets very often, but I virtually always put down a towel for sex stuff. :D
 
I think most of the people I've talked to in my local poly community want or expect sheets to be changed between sexual activity with partners. Honestly, I just think it's common courtesy. Even with condoms, sex can be messy. It can be sweaty, vagina having partners also have bodily fluids and condoms don't do didly for that.

If you have partners enough to change sheets often, then just have several sets of sheets, it's really not that hard.

BUT, clearly many people have different expectations, so it's definitely something that should be discussed and not assumed.

I've also had this same convo come up regarding showering between sex with different partners. Most people I know consider it standard and expect it, and yet I've seen a few people who are like "oh, this is usually an expectation? I probably should check in with my people." .... er.... yikes!
 
I think most of the people I've talked to in my local poly community want or expect sheets to be changed between sexual activity with partners. Honestly, I just think it's common courtesy. Even with condoms, sex can be messy. It can be sweaty, vagina having partners also have bodily fluids and condoms don't do didly for that.

All of this!

I've also had this same convo come up regarding showering between sex with different partners. Most people I know consider it standard and expect it, and yet I've seen a few people who are like "oh, this is usually an expectation? I probably should check in with my people." .... er.... yikes!

Wait....what. People...people won't shower between (obviously unless it's a 3some because yeah...you're all in that together), but like....REALLY? I am shook
 
All of this!

Wait....what. People...people won't shower between (obviously unless it's a 3some because yeah...you're all in that together), but like....REALLY? I am shook

Ehhh, I don't always shower between Artist and Knight, tbh, or really anyone else and Knight. Knight has a bit of a "hotwife" kink, tbh, so if I come home from a date (or date leaves my home or whatever) I often get jumped on before I've gotten around to showering. ::shrug:: his choice, he knows what I've been doing. And being prissy about the sheets seems silly when you've had multi person sex with the people in question.
 
Ehhh, I don't always shower between Artist and Knight, tbh, or really anyone else and Knight. Knight has a bit of a "hotwife" kink, tbh, so if I come home from a date (or date leaves my home or whatever) I often get jumped on before I've gotten around to showering. ::shrug:: his choice, he knows what I've been doing. And being prissy about the sheets seems silly when you've had multi person sex with the people in question.

Understandable! I don't always shower between B and Z; we all live together, and have had multiperson sex together; and consent to it. So showering that much feels so superfluous. Between partners who you haven't had that discussion with though feels wrong.

But, you should also be having that discussion if you're having sex. It's like the condom discussion.
 
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