Poly mom 😊

DarkFay92

New member
Hi all! I'm a 28F who is happily living together with her childhood best friend and metamour N (28F) and our pivot partner K (38M). N and K have been together for almost 11 years now, and I joined this beautiful relationship almost 5 years ago.

I have an 8yo son from a previous relationship, whose godmother is N, and N and K have a 5yo daughter together who is my absolutely adorable goddaughter. Since both N and K work fulltime, I'm "stuck" with those two rascals (wouldn't trade it for anything in the world though!).

I get to stay home because I am a chronic pain patient 😞 which is challenging enough as it is. But with the two people I love most in the world taking care of me, I'm as happy as one could be in my situation!

I joined this forum because my metamour and my partner have both invaded my other sources of advice (they finally got into social media). I'm always looking for other people's points of view; you never know what you might learn!
 
Welcome!

It must be tough caring for two young kids when you suffer from chronic pain. Parenting is harder, physically, and often emotionally, than a desk job. I hope you're not getting burnt out.

I'm sorry your partners invaded your safe spaces for advice. That can be a tricky situation.
 
Welcome!

It must be tough caring for two young kids when you suffer from chronic pain. Parenting is harder, physically, and often emotionally, than a desk job. I hope you're not getting burnt out.

I'm sorry your partners invaded your safe spaces for advice. That can be a tricky situation.
Caring for the kids is hard, but so rewarding. Their smiles definitely make up for all the times they accidentally hurt me while hugging me 😊 and my family is very helpful and supportive, so I get to let my body rest well in time 😊

Them invading my safe space hadn't really been an issue up until now, because we go so far back there's nothing we can't say to each other. Only now I find myself in a situation where I want to put off talking to them about my doubts until I at least know what I want for myself, so it would be awkward if they read my questions online instead of hearing them from me directly. This particular situation is so specific that they'd easily figure out it's my post... 🤔
 
I read your other post first and didn't see this...didn't realize you had a kid as well as chronic pain. It sounds like you are pretty happy with your poly situation, but maybe also feeling a little isolated and bored? Like maybe you want to try dating poly dating?

That might be a good idea if it's not the high-drama J guy from your other post :)

For me I find that bad-idea crushes often happen to me when I want to add something different my life. I'm someone who has to put a huge effort into dating--it doesn't come easily to me. I've been pretty happy dating no one else while my partner has dated a lot...but I also do WANT to have another relationship too. When I start fantasizing about a bad-idea casual-sex guy from 12 years ago, I know it means I need to push myself to go on actual dates :)

Maybe you want to start by talking to K (and N?) about the possibility of you seeking another relationship?
 
I read your other post first and didn't see this...didn't realize you had a kid as well as chronic pain. It sounds like you are pretty happy with your poly situation, but maybe also feeling a little isolated and bored? Like maybe you want to try dating poly dating?

That might be a good idea if it's not the high-drama J guy from your other post :)

For me I find that bad-idea crushes often happen to me when I want to add something different my life. I'm someone who has to put a huge effort into dating--it doesn't come easily to me. I've been pretty happy dating no one else while my partner has dated a lot...but I also do WANT to have another relationship too. When I start fantasizing about a bad-idea casual-sex guy from 12 years ago, I know it means I need to push myself to go on actual dates :)

Maybe you want to start by talking to K (and N?) about the possibility of you seeking another relationship?
Oh, thanks for figuring this out, Meera. I didn't realize this was that person.
 
Greetings DarkFay92,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

I looked at your other thread, and responded there briefly. To summarize, I think you should always follow your heart, that's just my opinion. I hope you will carefully consider all the advice that you have received here, and then figure out what is the right pathway for you. It may not be exactly what any one person advised, it may be more of a hybrid solution. Just so it's the right solution for you.

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 
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