Polyamory/polysexuality/monogamy/monoamory

[Magdlyn]

I have been thinking about these terms (and others) a lot lately. Generally, on threads here, people use these two terms: "poly," and "monogamy."

Many are not aware that monogamy means "married to one." In Greek, gamos means marriage. So, technically, an unmarried couple who only date each other are not "monogamous." They are "monoamorous" (one love), or "monosexual" (sex with just one person at a time).

Likewise, many people are confused about "polyamory." They do not understand that "amor" means "love" in Latin. Polyamory means loving more than one. It doesn't mean having sex with more than one, or having more than one sexual partner in one's life. It doesn't mean one is promiscuous. Asexuals can be polyamorous, and never have sex.

Usually, people are lazy and just use the words "poly," and "mono." Poly just means "many." If you don't add the "amory" or "sexual" part to the word, it's basically meaningless, as far as relationships go.

Again, you're only "monogamous" if you are married, legally, to one person. If you are romantically linked to just one person, you are literally "monoamorous."

I'd kind of like to open the vocabulary to adding "monoamorous" to "polyamorous" for those of us that are not married. The opposite of "monogamous" is "polygamous," and of course, polygamy is technically illegal.

Thoughts?

 

[kdt26417]

I can imagine it would be helpful to add these terms to the glossary thread. I haven't visited it in quite a while, so I don't know which if any of them it has. Information and accuracy about the word "polyamory" is not widespread, which is why it's all too often used interchangeably with swinging (and is called "this lifestyle").

 

[azurebonds]

I usually refer to my polyamorous, pseudo-polygamous, relationship structure as “the situation,” since the lifestyle reminds me too much of swinging.

That being said, I also dislike the imprecision of polyamory vs monogamy as antonyms in popular culture, so I’d support adding more technically correct words to the vocabulary. I do think that switching the usage will likely be an uphill battle, as often online things quickly polarize to have an other.

 

[Magdlyn]

I usually refer to my polyamorous, pseudo-polygamous, relationship structure as “the situation,” since the lifestyle reminds me too much of swinging.

That being said, I also dislike the imprecision of polyamory vs monogamy as antonyms in popular culture, so I’d support adding more technically correct words to the vocabulary. I do think that switching the usage will likely be an uphill battle, as often online things quickly polarize to have an other.

I am sure my interest in the accuracy of grammar will not be shared by many. I wanted to point out the inaccuracy though, of calling the opposite of "polyamory" "monogamy," instead of "monoamory," as I intend to be more conscious of my usage of these terms, and of using them in my posts, myself, in the future. Others can join me, if they are tired of the assumption of marriage in their (or other's) monoamorous (non-legally-married) relationship, if they are "just" partners, and not actual spouses.

Actual marriage is becoming less and less popular, after all.