Relationship advice

AL26

New member
Hello all,

New to this, just seeking advice on how to handle jealousy. I'm in a "triad" relationship to with M who is married to S. And as in any relationship there can be jealousy issues that we keep trying to work on. M and S have been together for over 20 years therefore, I tend to feel a little insecure at times as I'm the new one in the relationship.S and I have had our bumps on the road making things between us two difficult. Whenever I feel jealous towards S, I tried to focus on all the love I have for M as well as all the love he has for me. But at times it can be hard. So thought maybe reading how some of you handle jealousy may help me out.

Thank you! :)
 
Hello all,

New to this, just seeking advice on how to handle jealousy.

Jealousy, like all negative emotions just plain suck. But the good news, they can be dealt with. For instance, how do you handle anger?

When and what triggers your jealous feelings? That would be a start for some discussion. Details will help us all out in giving you advice.

Matou
 
Jealousy is just an emotion, so like any emotion, you just need to develop coping skills. First and foremost, communication is a big deal. You need to talk about why you're jealous and maybe your partners can help reassure you and quell your insecurities. I wish you luck in figuring it all out. *hugs*
 
It's very hard to be a shared partner to two people who have been together for several years.

Do you have any rights or are you just expected to go by their set of established rules?

Try reading here

https://www.morethantwo.com/polyforsecondaries.html
 
Hi AL26,

Here are some links for coping with jealousy ...

Jealousy, Envy, Insecurity, etc.
How do you achieve compersion?

Jealousy and Insecurity
The Theory of Jealousy Management
The Practice of Jealousy Management

Jealousy and the Poly Family
Kathy Labriola: Unmasking the Green-Eyed Monster
Kathy Labriola: "First Aid" for Jealousy
Brené Brown: the Power of Vulnerability

There is also a book you can read, "The Jealousy Workbook: exercises and insights for managing open relationships," by Kathy Labriola.

Hope that helps.
Sincerely,
Kevin T.
 
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