Sharing sex toys. Yes, No, some?

We ask before using each other's personal toys. Some things feel more personal than others.

So far, Henry has said if the toy can be put in a condom or is glass/metal, no problem.

Toys that are considered joint toys are fine to share as long as they get cleaned properly.

He has not borrowed any of mine yet since he isn't seeing anyone else. I have one or two I would prefer not to share but most things that can be properly sanitized, no problem.

Oops- didn't notice this was so old. My mistake.

There is no rule against reviving old threads if people want to continue the conversation! Some folks may have missed it the first time around (or joined after). Just because it was revived by spam (thanks for those doing the reporting!) doesn't mean that we can't continue the convo. (Posters should be aware, however, that the original forum members may no longer be active.)

I don't have too many toys myself (I prefer vibrators to insert-ables and don't have any serious kink toys) but don't have any issues with sharing once safer-sex issues have been addressed and routine (soap and water) cleaning is generally acceptable.

Lotus had tons of sex toys that we played with - and was scrupulous about appropriate sanitation between individuals.

New recommendations for the HPV vaccine include at risk individuals up to age 45 (read - people who are having sex with new people). But there is no harm in getting vaccinated after that, though you may have to pay out of pocket. (There is an actual biological reason why women are less likely to contract HPV leading to cervical cancer as they get older...but I will hold off on the biology lesson unless people are really curious! :rolleyes:)
 
One thing that I believe wasn't mentioned yet is the possibility to have "an inner circle" of people who are on the same level when it comes to trust and commonly agreed rules of safe sex. I believe Tristan Taormino called this group "fluid bonded" in her book Opening up.

I guess if all the participants are fluid bonded and agree on safe sex practices (inside and outside this group), I guess sharing of toys should be fine. Of course, cleaning the toys after use is advisable - even if you'd be the only one using it.

Sharing-economy is on the rise, anyway :p
 
Biology Lesson

OK - you asked for it!:D

The cells lining the vagina are "squamous cells," multiple layers of which form the "squamous epithelium." The cells lining the inside of the cervical are "columnar cells," A single layer of which forms the "columnar (or glandular) epithelium." The area where these two types of meet is called the "sqaumocolumnar junction (SCJ)."

When a female baby is born the SCJ is located on the outside of the cervix (not just in the cervical canal) so the outside of the cervix is covered with a single layer of columnar cells which meet up with the squamous cells on the outer part of the cervix where it meets the vagina. As the baby grows through childhood and before puberty the uterus grows too and the SCJ ends up much closer to the opening of the cervical canal (or "external os") {think of turning an inside- out sock, right-side-out - very slowly}. Then puberty hits and the cervix once again grows and changes, this time as a result of female hormones, and the SCJ is pushed/puffed out of the opening and is once again on the outside of the cervix (this is called an "ectropion").

Over the course of time, being exposed to the acidic environment of the vagina, these columnar cells start to transition into squamous cells, starting at the original SCJ and gradually working closer and closer to the cervical os. This is a process known as "squamous metaplasia." The area of new immature squamous metaplasia (where the cells are in various stages of changing from columnar cells into squamous cells) is called the "transformation zone" - located between the original SCJ and the advancing edge of the new SCJ.

Because these cells are in a state of flux - transitioning from one cell type to another while they are the outside of the cervix where they can come into contact with a partner's tissue/fluids during sex - they are much more vulnerable to infection with HPV which can (in the case of "high-risk" strains of HPV) lead to genetic errors in the replication of the cells which are the pre-cancerous changes that are screened for on a Pap smear.

Now, in a young healthy woman the vast majority of these errors are caught by the immune system early and young women will often "clear" the HPV infection before the changes can become significant (which is why Paps are not recommended before 21).

As a woman ages the new SCJ (the leading edge of the transformation zone) continues to make it's way further and further into the external os and up into the cervical canal. So by the late reproductive years and peri-menopausal period the vulnerable transitioning cells are physically less likely to come in contact with the infectious tissues/fluids during sexual activity and therefore older women are less likely that young women to contract a new HPV infection.

That may be more detail than you wanted - but I tend to get on a roll! :rolleyes:
 
That was fascinating, thanks!
 
Thanks for the info! I appreciate you sharing this so much.
 
Honestly that depends on the definition of toy. Something that he fluid contact? Totally get the objection. BDSM toys? Expensive and I don’t have a problem with sharing. Though I wouldn’t buy used, unless it was some situation where it was a partner/lover/FWB downsizing a collection or the like...
 
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