Smelling the flowers

Petunia

Member
I ended up ordering three 6-in-1 tall raised beds from Epic Gardens. I wish I could have gotten the tall 8-in-1 size, but they were out of stock and not expected to ship until June. I am considering adding some when they open up the pre-order list. I am tempted to get two round ones for things like a asparagus bed or strawberries. I'm still working on a way to keep the deer from eating the plants. I'm hoping hoops with netting will suffice. Oh, just had a thought that the wild turkeys may also be tempted to help themselves, so the netting would solve that issue, too. I may order some grow pots for herbs and tomato and zucchini plants.

I'm going to order mulch this week. I just need to calculate how many yards we need. Bond doesn't want to pay for the dyed mulch and I'm tired of not having dyed, so this may be on my dime.

I ordered clover seed for the yard. We have some bare areas where we didn't get the leaves off and they killed the grass out. It's a shaded area and I'm not 100% that there is enough sunshine for the clover. Just gonna cross my fingers and hope for the best.

This past weekend Bond, B, and I went on another cemetery excursion. This time we drove 90 minutes to one that is supposed to haunted. The weather was sublime! On the way back we found three other cemeteries, and one was really neat because it was set in the country on a dead end. It was really peaceful. I had to laugh at a person's name on one of the tombstones, though. Morris W. Morris. Seriously. Like, did his parents have so many children prior to his arrival that they had run out of creativity and just took the easy path?

Tonight is date night. We're going to order takeout from our favorite Indian restaurant. We ordered from there last Tuesday and now we have a jag for it.

So, my sister has been sick. She was tested for COVID-19 last week and it came back negative. Thirty percent of the tests have a false negative though. I'm betting she actually has it. She has the symptoms. It's concerning, because she has angina from having had typhoid.

My daughter visited my parents last week. Initially when I heard about it, I thought that's great, because I assumed they sat outside, but my sister said that wasn't the case. I'm like WTF! I can't imagine why she thought it was okay to go into their house and why they didn't redirect things to sitting outside - apart. Plus, my daughter brought a friend with! Fuck!

My exciting news is that we booked a house via VRBO for a week this summer. I spaced a day between rental blocks for the house to air out and the host accepted our dates, so I feel like it's low risk. The house is less than 3 hours north of us and on a lake. There are 4 kayaks, a paddle board, and a boat for our use. The shoreline is sandy, so swimming should be nice. There is a nice fire ring with Adirondack chairs for evening entertainment. Bring on the s'mores! I'm so stoked that we're going to have a vacation after all.

My work has extended telecommuting until May 1 and will re-evaluate on a weekly basis. I'm super nervous that they're going to call us in early. I'm not sure what I will do if that happens. I'm stressed about it.
 

Petunia

Member
My sister has had a couple of days now where she has felt better. I hope it continues. She is worried about opening the museum she runs and trying to figure out safety measures. Most of the volunteers that make the place operate are senior citizens, i.e., the highest risk group. The gift shop is a big concern, and it generates the bulk of their operating budget. Lots to sort through.
 

AlwaysGrowing

Active member
My sister has had a couple of days now where she has felt better. I hope it continues. She is worried about opening the museum she runs and trying to figure out safety measures. Most of the volunteers that make the place operate are senior citizens, i.e., the highest risk group. The gift shop is a big concern, and it generates the bulk of their operating budget. Lots to sort through.

Hubby also works in nonprofit management. They are not looking to reopen to the public until fall, possibly next year if risk levels stay fairly high. They aren't willing to risk their older volunteers and visitors. They're lucky though since they have multiple community donors willing to keep them afloat in the meantime.
 

Petunia

Member
Hubby also works in nonprofit management. They are not looking to reopen to the public until fall, possibly next year if risk levels stay fairly high. They aren't willing to risk their older volunteers and visitors. They're lucky though since they have multiple community donors willing to keep them afloat in the meantime.

I wish they'd do the same. They have cancelled all of their events, at least through the end of June. They're trying to set up touch-less touring. I suggested putting markers on the floor to help people gauge social distancing. They're considering requiring masks, or at least offering masks. Keeping doors open for airflow and to eliminate the need to touch handles. Hand sanitizer stations. Fewer volunteers. Limiting gift shop customers to five people. My sister wanted to close the gift shop and the saloon, but the board wasn't receptive. Lunch stand only offering a box lunch that is made in advance, so that they only need one person in the kitchen. She wants a barrier added in the mens' restroom between the urinal and sink for privacy so that the door can remain open. Overall they're worried about money. Their annual budget is $150,000 and a little more than 1/3 is earned income. She said that normally by now she would have spent $10,000 getting ready for the season. So far she has spent zero and asked the maintenance department to only spend what they absolutely have to.
 

WhatHappened

New member
I ended up ordering three 6-in-1 tall raised beds from Epic Gardens. I wish I could have gotten the tall 8-in-1 size, but they were out of stock and not expected to ship until June. I am considering adding some when they open up the pre-order list. I am tempted to get two round ones for things like a asparagus bed or strawberries. I'm still working on a way to keep the deer from eating the plants. I'm hoping hoops with netting will suffice. Oh, just had a thought that the wild turkeys may also be tempted to help themselves, so the netting would solve that issue, too. I may order some grow pots for herbs and tomato and zucchini plants.

I'm going to order mulch this week. I just need to calculate how many yards we need. Bond doesn't want to pay for the dyed mulch and I'm tired of not having dyed, so this may be on my dime.

I like those raised beds--just finished watching the video. We've started the garden inside and I'm hoping to have it planted outside by the end of the weekend. I've talked with the kids about doing raised beds this year.
 

Petunia

Member
I like those raised beds--just finished watching the video. We've started the garden inside and I'm hoping to have it planted outside by the end of the weekend. I've talked with the kids about doing raised beds this year.

I wish I had them right now. I can't wait to get them set up and the first plants in them. If you make the leap to raised beds I doubt you'll regret it. :)
 

Petunia

Member

WhatHappened

New member
I wish I had them right now. I can't wait to get them set up and the first plants in them. If you make the leap to raised beds I doubt you'll regret it. :)

I'm sure I won't. I visited a friend last summer with an amazing garden, probably half an acre of raised beds. It's the time and expense of getting started!

What all are you growing?
 

Petunia

Member
The garden list:

  • asparagus
  • basil
  • pole beans
  • Brussels sprouts
  • Swiss chard
  • sweet peppers
  • cilantro
  • cucumbers
  • garlic
  • kale
  • lettuce/greens
  • onions
  • radishes
  • rosemary
  • spinach
  • tomatoes
  • zucchini
 

Petunia

Member
It's Wednesday, and it's B and Bond's day to hangout. They have resumed their bi-weekly hangout. It has always bothered me, but when a workday meant I was in the office, it wasn't always so obvious that I was being left out. And that's how I feel about it. I am sad to not be included. I try to get past it, but it stubbornly remains a thing that I have to deal with.

For reasons that they cannot agree upon, when we started working from home the first Wednesday that they would have normally hung out, we planned a hike at a state park. After that they quit having their Wednesdays. I didn't even realize the timing of the hike, or the fact that they had quit having their special day.

Bond claims that for a number of Wednesdays B had excuses, she was not feeling well, she was tired, she needed solo time. B says that Bond dropped the ball on their Wednesdays. In their back and forth texting argument she said that she didn't like the two of us dropping by her place all of the time, that having the two of us together all of the time was too much. That she'd rather have a solo night than the two of us together. We had started dropping by her place if we went out for a drive in the evening. We'd be about to go home and Bond would suggest we drop by her place. Sometimes we'd be there 10 minutes, sometimes longer. I don't know why, but I had a funny feeling about it. To me it didn't feel comfortable, but I wasn't sure why.

I shouldn't have even been privy to what I did learn about their disagreement, but Bond wanted to vent and as soon as I opened my eyes that morning he told me the part about not wanting the two of us together at her place all of the time. That was like an ice pick to the heart and I cried on and off for hours and days. I felt like I was the unwelcome guest at a private function, so I sent her a message saying that if she wanted her Wednesdays back, that was fine. To my thinking, she was saying I was the interloper and unwanted and the only thing I can control is my part of the equation. I offered to go to my parents' to visit them for the day on the weekend, so they could have time together, but then had to rescind when I learned from my sister that our parents weren't social distancing and my dad was being pretty awful. Nothing like being in the middle of a pandemic and you want to make yourself scarce to lick your wounds in private and you can't simply go some place, because nowhere is safe.

I can't remember all of the back and forth, but there wasn't a lot. I did express that she needs to communicate when something is upsetting her instead of pulling away. She said something to the effect of 'she just needed to adjust her expectations'. Well, that's one way to deal with things, or you can be open and honest with your partners and have a discussion with them and see if they are willing to meet you partway.

The next morning B sent a message about Bond and me discussing her and Bond's issues, and she doesn't get in between us when we're having issues. And that I was making it all about me.

Um, let's see, I wake up and hear that she'd rather have a solo night than have me come over with Bond. I do what I can to fix this blunder that I've unintentionally committed, and I ask her to communicate when there is a problem.

I started private messaging her after that, explaining that I barely knew anything about their fight, other than being told she'd rather have a solo night than have me there with Bond. That I was sorry and hadn't realized what was happening.

So she feels things are good between the two of us, but I'm still hurting. Over the length of our relationship she has said from time to time that she feels connected to me, but that it takes work for her to feel connected to Bond. I don't believe it. I don't feel connected or even wanted. I really feel like I'm the extra when it comes to the three of us.

Bond and I were like walking wounded and barely trusting each other for weeks after all of this went down. He felt like he can't talk to anyone about his problems, because I get upset when I learn things that are about how B feels about me, and I am angry at him for telling me the things he did.

Their lives and relationship are back to normal and they are spending their bi-weekly Wednesdays together, and I'm still bleeding.

She has only asked me to hangout just the two of us a few times ever. I have every other Friday off now, but she hasn't asked me to do anything with her. Bond reminds me that I don't ask her either, and that's true. I'm just so hurt that I can't bring myself to ask. We had dinner at her house once on a datenight since this all went down, but other than that time I haven't been to her house. I've stayed home when Bond has gone over there to do things. I don't know if she's noticed. I think she thinks I'm just busy with my own things.

Four years in June, and I don't feel welcome in her home.

But this isn't about me and I need to get over myself.
 

Petunia

Member
Enough sad stuff.

The appraisal on the house that Twitch and co-own came in $20-40K over what I thought it would. Wow.

Wil is coming this weekend and staying for 11 days, until the day after his 60th b-day. He's going to help construct the raised garden beds, deer fence and gate. I'm super excited to see him and to have this project start.

My middle son's welding classes resumed with a very small class size. It is in a well ventilated shop, so I feel it's low risk.
 

Petunia

Member
Garden is built, fence is yet to be installed, and we only have a couple of days left before Wil leaves. It's been an enormous amount of work to accomplish what we have so far. The discouraging part is that the leaf canopy is finally filling out and the garden is so shaded that I am seriously concerned about plants getting enough sunlight to thrive. I'm mostly planting brasicas, spinach, lettuce, radishes, and onions - all plants that require less sunshine than most vegetables.

The protests and riots far overshadow anything else that is happening right now. The pain and anxiety for black and brown people in my chest seems to be a constant, and I can only imagine how people of color are feeling. My youngest son is in the Wisconsin National Guard and yesterday he was deployed here to Madison. My biggest worry was that he'd get caught in something that would haunt him for years to come. He had me warn a few of his friends of color, and my liberal friends that they were arriving and that they had not been issued rubber bullets and that they'd be armed in the full sense. My middle son helped me gain some peace when he reminded me that the military is about show of force and that they are better trained than the police at handling situations and de-escalating things. Thankfully, it was pretty non-eventful last night.

Franki had/has a covid scare, and although her test came back negative, highly suspects that she is actually positive. :(

Today is my dad's 85th birthday. I need to call him and wish him a happy birthday. I've been avoiding him due to his crazy pants viewpoints/beliefs, so I'm procrastinating. My sister is a fucking saint for dealing with him and also for organizing gifts to him from all three of us kids. She's picking up gift certificates from two restaurants, one where they go for breakfast, and the other where they go to for Friday fish fry, a gas gift card, and season passes for both of our parents to the historical museum that my sister runs. They spend a lot of time there, so it's nice to have that covered for them.

B's mother is being a royal bitch. I'll have to explain more of that later. Gotta grab some lunch and get back to work right now.
 

Petunia

Member
Today the head of the bureau that I work for sent out a letter letting us know that we will have to start coming into the office in early August. We'll rotate one week telecommuting with one week of in-office. I'm upset and scared about having to go back to an office setting. There is no work need for any of us to have to work from the office. We can all do our work via telecommuting. It seems unconscionable that they are forcing us to return before a vaccine is available considering this.

I've been playing with numbers and I cannot afford to retire this early. If I wasn't paying my grandson's child support, or helping my daughter, or my parents, or still paying off student loans, it would be feasible. I wish we lived in a country with universal health care. What a game changer that would be.

I am going to practice wearing a mask during the workday to see how that goes.

It just dawned on me that if I continue working a compressed schedule that I'll only need to be in the office 4 days instead of 5 on the weeks I'm scheduled to be there (because I'll have the Fridays after payday off.) :)

I need to hold out another 4 years before retiring. At that point I'll be done paying child support and the student loans will be long paid off, and hopefully Bond will divorce his ex and I can go on his health insurance. That alone would be $1,200+/month less in expenses.
 

Petunia

Member
I bailed out of wearing the N-95 mask after a fairly short period. My glasses were fogging up repeatedly and if I added a tissue to solve that issue, then I couldn't comfortably draw air. I just put on a cloth homemade mask that ties. Wish me luck. It's kind of funny, but I think it's easier for me to wear a mask when I'm up and moving. Maybe it's psychological, or maybe I need a different design.

I'm considering retiring from the state, and starting a real estate career. Surprisingly, our housing market is up in Madison. From talking to builders and agents it seems people are desiring to get out of housing that is in close proximity to others in light of the pandemic. I sent a feeler email out to my real estate buddy to get his input. I see many perks, but also some risks, and some negatives related to the field. If I could supplement my income with realty, I think I'd be much happier than doing the work I can presently doing.
 

Petunia

Member
Today I had a hair appointment. First haircut since February. My pixie was in pretty sad shape. I'm so happy, because the yellow-ish stuff that was left from lightening what had been dyed is finally gone. Now I'm (mostly) salt and pepper. Woot!

I also realized that wearing an N95 mask without glasses is much easier. I am now considering lasik surgery. I may find that I am too old for it, but I feel it's worth exploring. It's not like mask wearing is going away in a few weeks.

I had a talk with my boss and coworker and they think I'll be granted an accommodation to continue to work from home. I cannot tell you how much my anxiety has lightened. I scheduled a doctor's appointment for Monday which will be via phone. Fingers crossed.

My life will be so much better if I don't have to suddenly retire. In fact, my renters are planning on buying the house in August. Our lender took so long with the refinance that we canceled it yesterday in light of the sale of the house happening so soon. We thought our renters would have to push off the purchase until late this year or early next year, but instead they are right on track with their original plan. I think I'll get upwards of $87,000 for my part the proceeds. I plan on paying off the student loans I took for my kids with part of it.

I am trying to decide if I'll invest it in multi-family real estate. I was so set on doing this, but with the pandemic hitting and suddenly 1 in 7 in our state is without employment I am not as hot to pursue that as I once was.

With the student loans paid off my monthly bills drop down to a pretty low level. I did some calculations and I'll be able to afford to max out my 457 deferred compensation fund. (This is in addition to the mandatory retirement fund that my employer matches.) At my age I can contribute $26,000/yr.

Tuesday was our 4th anniversary for the Triad. We ordered food from a local burger joint, but nothing special. Later we realized where we should have ordered from to make it special, so tonight we're doing that. LOL. Bond says we can celebrate three times, because there are three of us. Love his logic.

S3 turns 14 on Sunday. He wants a hangout with his friends (3 of them) on Saturday. They've had two social hangouts this month. These things make me so nervous. To add to the worry, our county is having a steep uptick in covid cases this week. Bond said they could do a backyard hangout, with my easy-up vending tent if needed, or if the weather is bad, that he'd probably be okay with them hanging out in the sunroom with the doors closed to the house, but open on the patio side, and possibly running fans to keep the air moving. They want to play board games or cards. They may also go to the park to throw Frisbees. We can designate a bathroom for guests to use, most likely the master bathroom, because it's easily accessible from the patio.

On Sunday we are ordering sushi; the birthday boy's request.

Continuing on the S3 topic, his mother sat him down this week for his origin story, which he took in stride. When asked if he had any questions, he asked if they could make cupcakes. The other two boys will be brought up to speed on his parentage in the next week or so after he's had some time to digest the news. I'm so glad that is out of the closet so to speak.

We got a couple of proposals for landscape work to fix the water issue in the basement and picked a company out of the two. Work begins the week of 9/21/20. :D

We are also going back and forth with a construction company to get a proposal finalized on a new roof, gutters, and exterior house painting. We may also replace the garage door with a more contemporary style that will go with the house better. There is nothing wrong with the current door, so I will not be at all surprised if Bond decides to just have it painted.

For some reason, maybe because it's a tack-on kind of project, the proposal doesn't include the rails we want replaced on each side of our sidewalk that goes over a little bridge. Bond thinks that will be a separate proposal. I think he forgot it.
 

Petunia

Member
I have appointments set up with two different lasik places, July 13th and 17th. I may cancel one of them. Seems kind of crazy to expose myself to two appointments. I hope it is an option for me, regardless of my age. From the questions they asked me it seems like I don't have nothing ruling me out. The exam will be the final determination, though.

Yesterday I had a phone appointment with a nurse practitioner regarding getting an ADA accommodation, and she is willing to support me getting one for working from home. I am so relieved. Cases are trending upwards here.

Bond kind of poo-pooed my idea of stuffing my 457(b). He thinks I should build up a large savings and do the real estate investments. That surprised me. He feels it won't have time to grow sufficiently, and that I'd do better putting it in other vehicles. I'm undecided, but truthfully, I know little about investing.

Only one of S3's friends was able to come over on Saturday. They stayed outside. They did play chess and that is kind of a concern seeing as they were both touching the pieces.

Sunday Naya and her bf joined us for the birthday celebration. It was interesting to hear her thoughts on the coming school year. She does not plan on sending S2 and S3 to school, and may actually opt for them to take a gap year. Technically they'd register as homeschooling them, but would not actually school them. Then next year when things have hopefully settled down, send them back to school. I'm not sure if this is a good plan or not. I do know that neither parent is good about making sure they complete online work or requiring a routine. Both boys are brilliant and could probably pick right up where they left off, but I do worry that they won't retain everything and will be set back a bit. This will mean they'll start college a year after they normally would have, and that's another year of living at home. Oh, dear god!

Naya asked Bond if he'd take the boys through the hot spell we're about to endure. She opted out of replacing her air conditioner six years ago and this week is finally having someone come evaluate if all it needs is a tune-up or if she should replace it. We're 99% sure it'll need to be replaced. It's likely she won't have a new unit for weeks. So, she asked for us to take them Monday - Friday. We were just ending our 5 days straight. That would have made it 10 days straight, Saturday at her place, then back to our house on Sunday because we're leaving on Monday afternoon for vacation with them for a week. So, 18 days with one day off. Um, no. At first Bond thought she was asking to switch a couple of days, but when I asked if she meant tomorrow (which is now yesterday) through Friday, she confirmed. Thankfully Bond said no. I was shocked by that. Well, truth be told I was shocked that she asked. Bond said my face oh hell no. So, the compromise is that she'll keep them our Wed-Thurs and they'll return on Friday and we'll have them for the weekend before the trip when normally she'd have them.

For fuck's sake, it's not our problem that she decided to forego AC for years. Her basement is finished and they usually sleep downstairs in hot weather. They can continue to do the same.

Bond decided to tack on a solar tube over the stairway to the roofing project. Then when I brought up the rails for the walkway he was like, do we really need to add to the cost of this project. I bet the rails cost as much as the solar tube. I'm so disappointed. When he saw my disappointment, which I tried to hide, he said he was going to email the guy to remind him about adding it to the project, but so far I haven't seen the email. Maybe he forgot to include me on it, although so far it's been a 3-way email.

B's mother is getting out of the convalescent center tomorrow. She won't have any aids to help her until Monday, which means the responsibility will fall on B. She's nervous. She's purchased and installed things, like a toilet seat riser, to make life in her apartment possible, so things are pretty good to go there.

We started watching "Dark" on Netflix and we're really enjoying it.

Tonight is date night. Bond purchased steaks for dinner. Looking forward to that! :)
 

Petunia

Member
Catching this up fresh from vacation.

I had the first lasik appointment today. I'm definitely canceling the other one. They have determined that I am not a good candidate for lasik, which I really am fine with. I thought not having to wear glasses would be a bonus when it comes to masks, but it's not that big of a deal. I dislike contacts, as they do not improve my vision enough and irritate my eyes a great deal.

Telecommuting situation: they have canceled the return to the office plan and if and when they go back to it they'll give "at least a week's notice". You can definitely tell that the person calling the shots has no children, spouse, or partner, as he doesn't take into account the complexity of arranging one's life. I never received a response to my accommodation request, so my boss encouraged me to ask our HR person. Her response, "Because [big boss] is continuing with the work from home until further notice, we are holding off on sending the approval letter for your accommodation. Once there is a new date for employees to return to the office, we will be reevaluating requests and sending new approval letters." From that I take it that they would have granted my request and that if we are called back at some point in the future, that it'll happen then. I'm going to think of it that way and not let my anxiety get the best of me. I felt like saying something along the lines of "for fuck's sake, I need an accommodation for anxiety, and this limbo situation acerbates my anxiety, but I didn't.

With the uptick in COVID-19 cases in our state, and county/city, we have a mask mandate in place that started yesterday. I'm relieved that they did that.

B's mother ended up in the hospital on the day she was supposed to come home. She started throwing up blood, which turned out to be a bleeding ulcer. This meant that she didn't come home until the 4th of July. We left for vacation on the 6th, most of the help that had been arranged to start was canceled when she went into the hospital, so a lot had to happen to get things set up again. While we were gone some of it started up, like Meals on Wheels, and some visits from nurses, so it all seems to have happened much quicker than the 10 days they had stated that it would take.

Our vacation place was fabulous! The house was really nice, the lake was clean and not busy, the property has a lot of feet of shoreline as it is situated on an peninsula. The place came with 4 kayaks, 1 paddle board, and a jon boat, so we spent a lot of time on the water. We're planning on renting it again next summer (if I don't by a lake home before then). Sunday night we set up a telescope and were able to observe the comet, Neowise.

My daughter got a job bottle feeding calves, like 2000 calves. Split shift, 3-7am and 1-4pm. It's right up her alley.

My middle son took a paternity DNA test yesterday. He should know in 3-5 days if his daughter is truly his biological daughter. If not, he's going to be crushed, because he won't get custody rights. He loves her beyond measure either way, but legally he won't have a leg to stand on if she's not his biological daughter.
 

Petunia

Member
Today my unit had a Skype call with the big boss. He let us know that someone we worked with often from another agency died. I think the guy was only in his 30's. He was a really nice guy and I always enjoyed our interactions. We have not heard the cause of death, and while cautioned not to speculate, it's hard not to. I guess after a few days of him not showing up for work and not answering his phone they checked in on him and learned of his death. I wish I knew more about what steps they took checking on him. We may never find out, and it's certainly too soon to ask questions of his coworkers. It's all so shocking and tragic.

I'm watching lots of threads of discussion about schools resuming and whether that will be in-person instruction or online learning or homeschooling. I cannot see how they can return to in-classroom instruction safely. I understand how some parents need to have their kids in school, and how much kids want to return, but it's just not safe.

I'm hoping the school districts will remove the option and B's kids will have to remain home. At this point her oldest really wants to return to school, and her youngest is ambivalent, and all indications are that B is going to let them decide for themselves. She may change her stance between now and the beginning of September, as our state and county have had a surge of Covid-19 cases. I voiced my fears to Bond today, letting him know that if she sends her kids to school and if he chooses to continue to see her, that I feel I will need to move out of our house and into a place where I can isolate. As with anything in life, you can only control your own choices and others can make choices knowing the impact it will have outside of themselves.

We finished "Dark" and have started watching "Warrior Nun" last night.

Franki retires in two days. Today when she got to work her work station was all decorated. I'll be so glad when she no longer has to go into such a hot zone. She's worried about filling her time. I have a hard time relating to that. I am always busy. There were a few days when Bond and I just sat around on the weekend and I wondered if that's what retirement would feel like. It wasn't bad, but I wondered if I would get bored if everyday was like that.

After being on the lake for a week, we're all kind of gung ho about having a lakefront property. I could use the money I'll get from selling the house I own with Twitch to put down on a vacation home. I'd probably want to set it up as a vacation rental, but not over extend myself in case I need to make the full mortgage payment myself. I'd also need to set up maintenance and cleaning services, lawn care and snow removal.

On the other hand, if B sends her kids to school and Bond decides he is going to take a risk and continue to see B, then I may be buying a home for my own use.
 

Petunia

Member
I am so tired today and I don't know why. Fuzzy, muddled brain. It would be a good day for a nap.

I sent in the license renewal and money for my daughter to register her bf's car so she can get to work. He hasn't registered his car in four years, so I couldn't do it online. Nothing like dating a convict. :(

I wasn't going to come to her rescue until she exhausted all other avenues. Today she said that my mom told her she cannot continue to give her a ride every day, so I felt that it was time. I really want her to keep this job.
 

Petunia

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On Friday, B and I hung out and had a lot of fun day drinking and micro-dosing. Bond joined us in the evening and we ordered delivery (wings) and then drove downtown so we could face west/NW and get sunset pictures over the water.

The hangout started with B talking about how if we don't get into counseling she is tempted to end her relationship with Bond. He tends to be a nitpicker and he has a hard time sorting out what someone means if they use a wrong word. To complicate things, he has what he describes as a "sound vortex" which jumbles words on him. B is very sloppy with language and rarely direct when answering questions. Bond struggles to grasp what someone means when they use an incorrect word and he cannot move past, so he's right on you about what you said and it can be incredibly irritating and it tends to make you feel like a fool when it happens to you. I get why it drives her nuts. It can really wear you down. I understand that he simply cannot grok the meaning otherwise, so he presses. I really believe he is on the spectrum in some capacity. B would like a diagnosis so we know what's going on and hopefully have some tools to deal with it. He has tried to get a diagnosis in the past and failed, so he doesn't have much hope in regards to that. She would like the three of us to start relationship therapy and we're all down for that. I think it would be good for me to be in therapy with B, because I never feel safe confronting her about things she has done that have hurt me. I'm sure she has a laundry list of things that I do, too. :) So, it looks like therapy is in my future.

Speaking of therapy, my wonder former therapist, Martha, shared about her experience with Covid.Personal Reflections On COVID-19

My youngest son and his entire household (three friends and his girlfriend) are all COVID-19 positive. It seems that they are all doing remarkably well so far and no one is terribly ill. I'm sure it's their ages (24-28 or so). Tay said that a friend of theirs test positive, so they all went for testing and they are all positive. Which means they were being careless by hanging out with friends. Grr. Yesterday he lost his sense of smell/taste. He's had that happen multiple times in the past due to concussions, so he's familiar at least. :eek: I hope, hope, hope that they'll be more cautious going forward and that they'll stay away from those that may not fair as well if they catch it.

The Madison school district has decided that they'll start the school year with online only instruction, which is the only safe decision at this time. Today the Sun Prairie school district announced the same. I expect other school districts will do the same now that the largest district in the area has declared to do so. I believe that Milwaukee is also going with online this fall. Now we wait to hear the Middleton-Cross Plains school district decision. Fingers crossed that they'll do the same. Bond's two youngest kids and B's son are all in that district. I cannot imaging them deciding to have in-classroom teaching.

My middle son's DNA test came back stating that it's 99.99% certain that he is the father of my granddaughter. Woot! I believe things will either head to court or a mediator to decide placement. :) We're so happy.

B announced this morning that she's planning a trip in early August to visit her friends that live near Denver. Bond is trying to decide if he wants to ask to accompany her. I will not, as I have declared that I will never visit those friends ever again. It might be good for the two of them to have time together without me along. On the other hand, she may turn him down as he's driving her bonkers right now. It would be interesting to have the house to myself for a week. I haven't had that since I moved in with Bond.
 
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