Talking it out

I haven't felt like writing much lately. I've been in such a weird place emotionally that I just don't know where to start...

Hubby and I have been doing fun things together. It's been nice. He takes care of me and deals with my odd tendencies so well. I honestly don't know what I would do without him. This weird moods of mine only reinforce how much I need him in my life.

Joker is... well, mostly gone. We still talk occasionally, but I told him that there's no way I'm going to be romantic/sexual with him any more (we never had sex, but there were multiple instances of heavy petting). Without that, I'm not even interesting as a friend, I guess. He also got upset because I mentioned that he doesn't talk about his real life stuff with me anymore. The reason being - he knew it was a negative in my involvement with him. I told him shutting me out of all other aspects of his life was also a negative. Being limited to one (maybe two in the future) nights a week and never getting to know or be known by anyone else important in his life? Not appealing. So, yeah. Bye bye, Joker.

Boy is Boy. He'll say something sweet, I'll comment on it, and he'll distance himself. I'll say something, he'll think it's sweet, I'll say something, then he'll distance himself. It's a constant cycle, and while I'm mostly okay with it, it's still exhausting. I mean, I jokingly said something about liking him a little bit the other day, and he didn't say anything to me the rest of the day. He constantly talks about wanting to be there for me and how much he appreciates me being there for him, but if we get too close to anything relationshippy, he bolts. I'm just over it right now.

Work has been stressful. Really stressful. Injuries, illness, licensing, etc. So ready for some calm.

I really just want to find someone who enjoys cuddling up at home most of the time but really wants to get out and do fun things now and then. That truly cares about/for me. Someone that's going to reciprocate all the little things I do for the people I care about.

I guess what I want is for Hubby to be more available. He and Doomed are the only people who have ever managed to make me feel safe, loved, and mildly spontaneous.
 
So, one of the reason Boy had been being particularly weird about sweet moments is that his birthday is coming up. I make a production out of my partners' birthdays, and he doesn't celebrate them, so he was worried about the conflict there. I told him that I would have loved to do something special for his birthday, but I know he doesn't like it so I hadn't planned on even seeing him near his birthday. Turns out, his ex decided to have her new husband cook dinner at Boy's place and told him to invite me over. So, it looks like I'll get to get him a gift and spend the night after all. Maybe not what I would do for other people, but he's acknowledging it and eager to share it with me, so who the hell cares. :D

Hubby and I have a party at a friend's place this weekend. He's excited, I'm less so. The problems of an introvert. I don't know many of her friends, so I'm nervous that I'll feel awkward. Enough alcohol, though, and I'll have fun. Right? Yeah...

Doomed told me he misses me. That he still has feelings for me. That if it wasn't for the veto placed on me, I'd be the only person he'd be interested in pursuing. Awkward! I told him that I still care for him, but I would never want to be in a relationship with someone who treated me so horribly in the past. I told him I would never feel secure or that I could depend on him. He gets it, but it makes him sad when he realizes how much the situation hurt and affected me. I told him to stop bringing shit like that up if he didn't want a reminder. Dumbass.
 
Hubby has had a couple of "friend dates" lately, which makes him happy. He needs more of a social life, so I'm happy to see him reaching out to people he met while he was finishing up school. I'm also glad that he's done with school! Officially got his degree and everything. :)

Boy's birthday went really well. Dinner was delicious. His ex and I get along really well, have similar senses of humor, and enjoy giving Boy crap. :p I kept apologizing for being an ass on his birthday, but he'd just kiss me and say he wouldn't want me any other way. haha He was very affectionate, which made me feel a bit weird. His ex and her husband ended up leaving not long after dinner/dessert/presents, so we watched a movie and just relaxed the rest of the evening. Boy was excited about his gifts and hung up the sketch before bed and started figuring out where/when we could do the sex painting deal. :D So excited!

Doomed and I have been talking about sex lately. A lot. It's fun and frustrating and stupid all in one. I struggle with that knowing that his wife would be pissed, but it's his life/relationship/choice. I did comment on a post he made on Facebook, and she made a snarky comment that I'm pretty sure was directed at me (could have been in general, but yeah...). Oh, well! She can make him un-friend me if she doesn't want to see my comments.
 
I've come to terms with something recently. I love Boy. Yes, I know I've had this realization before and eventually convinced myself otherwise, buuuut... I do. I don't know why, and yeah. It doesn't change anything. I still consider us just doing whatever without labeling or actually expecting anything. I appreciate it when he's here for me, but I don't expect him to provide me with any comfort, time, or anything. The thing is... Lately, he's kind of been acting like he actually cares! It's strange. He cuddles a lot more intimately. He walks on the side of traffic to keep me away from it when we're on sidewalks. He kisses my cheeks and forehead at random. He volunteers to come over when I tell him I'm bored or lonely. We saw each other twice last week and twice this week, instead of our normal once a week. I know how he is, and I know I can't change my expectations of him just because he's acting like this, but it's nice while it lasts and makes me feel less stupid for caring about him as much as I do.

Hubby is excited to go to a speed dating event that's coming up. He's making me go, which I know will be fun. I'm just not anticipating actually meeting anyone. Yarn will be there, too, which is awesome since I haven't seen her in FOREVER!!!

I have to work this Saturday. Boo. I better go to bed.
 
Work was so awful this weekend. Then the speed dating was right after work! I had time to shower and then had to leave. It was crazy. I slept about 12 hours Saturday night and did absolutely nothing on Sunday because I was still tired! So draining.

Speed dating itself was okay, though. I had fun chatting with people, but I actually said no to every single one of my dates. A couple of people I talked to during breaks, though, said they were going to "cruise" me, so I should have a couple of email addresses coming my way of interesting people to talk to.

Doomed was freaking out this morning worried about his car. It died a couple of times on his way to work, so he wasn't sure if he'd make it home. I told him to call if he needed a ride. He seemed surprised I offered. I mean, really... If we're going to be friendly, I can do friendly things, right?! Anyway, he got home fine, so it's a non-issue. I wonder what that wifey of his would do, though, if he was stranded and I was the best option for a ride... Hmm... haha

Boy was really chatty this weekend, which is weird. Normally we barely text at all over the weekends. He checked in with me after speed dating to see if I enjoyed myself (and to rub it in that I did since I wasn't that excited about going). He also invited himself over later in the week and asked me to cook. Rotten man. I'm making something pumpkin this week, so he'll have dessert, too. I treat him too well. :p At least he appreciates my food. lol

Hubby is nervous about some career stuff going on in his life. It's kept him rather distracted.
 
Hubby and I occasionally decide to do stupid things like stay awake when one of us should be sleeping and eating junk food. Tonight will be one of those nights. He didn't get a promotion he was wanting, so the career stuff is no longer a concern for a bit. He figured he wouldn't get it, so he isn't TOO bummed, but it was still not pleasant. Someone more experienced got the position, shockingly enough. lol

Work has still been crazy for me. I don't know what's going on, but everyone is cranky so I'm trying to keep the peace. So far, so good, but it's exhausting. I've also had plans every evening this week, which is tiring for me. I have a cold that's kicking my ass, and sometimes I just want people to take care of me!

Boy did, kind of... He took me out to dinner (I requested spicy, so he suggested this Asian restaurant he'd been wanting to take me - super yummy!). We then came back and just watched a movie. I totally fell asleep with my head in his lap while he stroked my hair. :) We then went to bed, had some pretty awesome AG-was-half-asleep sex, then slept as far away as we could get in a king size bed. haha. Cuddled in the morning while we chatted and prepared to get up for work. It was nice.

Doomed has been lamenting his inability to bring me soup, give me hugs, bite my lip (old joke), etc. Pretty sure we've crossed some lines again when it comes to conversation topics. Not sure what I'm doing there, but so far it's just fun and not affecting my life.

The one guy I really felt like I could click with from speed dating is entertaining... We've been talking a bit, but scheduling seems to be next to impossible. He and Hubby got along well, too, so I'm hoping we can all hang out and just be friends. :)
 
Hubby and I are going out of town this weekend. It was going to be a pretty cheap trip, but I think we've decided to check out this B&B we've looked at before instead. Hikes the price up, BUT it'll be kind of romantic and sweet and fun. Makes it okay, right? :) I think we need some good, quality time together.

I had a fantastic day today. Work actually went well. I hung out with a friend of mine after, and we randomly decided to go pick up another friend who was feeling a little down. A few donuts later and we all felt better. :rolleyes: It was nice being more go-with-the-flow and running around to various places to get what we wanted for dinner, to drink, and for dessert. I miss people wanting to get out and actually do fun activities with me!

On that note... I sent Boy a message basically telling him I'm tired of the routine. We always have such big plans then never follow through. I'm over it. I want fun Boy or no Boy! lol We'll see how that goes. I'm pretty content to not see him if the plan is to just sit at one of our houses. At least for a couple of weeks. :D
 
I just had the best weekend away ever. It was just so lovely. Perfect weather. Adorable room. Fantastic beer. Hot sex. Seriously, perfect. Then we got home, Hubby went to hang out with a few friends, and I had some restful alone time.

Doomed called me during the alone time, though. It was interesting to hear his voice after so long. We laughed, we had awkward pauses, he tried to pressure me into admitting that Boy and I are seriously involved. He really doesn't like the whole lack of labels thing and admitted to feeling like I ultimately replaced him with Boy. I changed the subject quickly whenever that sort of talk came up. It was mostly good chatting, though. Not as weird as I expected to talk about our dating lives.

Boy and I didn't talk since that message until today. He called (yes, another actual call!) to ask me to go out later this week. A restaurant I've been wanting to try that he's never been to either, then a strip club for a drink. :D May not sound huge, but it kind of is since both things were mentioned quite a long time ago!

Overall, I'm feeling great about life right now. My budget is a little sad right now, but Hubby and I both get paid this week AND I have a check coming from my second job so... Yes. That should be acceptable in the next few days. I baked some incredibly delicious, but a little too sweet, pumpkin muffins. I love fall, I love pumpkin, and I love that I'm going to get more fresh pumpkins to cook up and can this weekend! Ah! Pumpkin! Haha
 
I had the best first date in my life this week. We went out to dinner, we looked at the stars, we went on a midnight walk, we made out, we fooled around, we cuddled, we napped briefly, we just clicked.

I'm hoping I get to see him again soon, but our schedules are horribly at odds. We shall see.

Hubby is out of sorts again. I think he gets a little insecure when I start dating successfully. The weekend is upon us, though, so hopefully he will feel better when we've had some quality time together.

Boy and I ended up having a kind of weird night together. We didn't do any of the fun things he'd offered up, because he's sick. So, we hung out and did our usual cuddling on the couch thing. Had some okay sex. Fell asleep and that was that. Maybe next week...
 
We made a second date happen this week! I cooked dinner at his place, sex, then a movie while we cuddled on the couch. It was pretty fantastic. I'm glad I'm able to feel comfortable and relaxed with someone again. I'm also glad that I learned my lesson with Doomed and am not jumping into something. He acts all confident and has some very old-fashioned tendencies (which I tend to find sweet), so I'm going to call him Suave on here. Anyway, I'm hoping we can find time next week, too, but I'm just waiting for the scheduling conflicts to rise back up.

Especially since... My friend's son has decided that I need to be there every Tuesday. Not sure why he chose Tuesdays, but I've agreed that I will dedicate that day to the family. My friend pays significantly more attention to her kids when I'm there than other weekdays, so I think he wanted to make sure it's a regular thing. I'm there one or two evenings a week anyway.

Boy is coming over tomorrow! It's been a while since he, Hubby, and I have all hung out together. I mentioned how much I love it when they're both around, and he alluded to threesomes... Is it bad that I am so hoping it happens, but don't want to be the one to suggest it?! :p Suave actually asked about threesomes, too, so if Hubby's open to it, I could have even more group sex in my life! Always fun.

Hubby has been a little weird about me starting to see Suave, though. I'm not sure if it's jealousy since he's not dated recently (even though that has been his choice), or if it's envy because we don't see each other, or if he's just being weird and having growing pains again. I'm hoping we can talk more soon to delve into it a bit more.

I've been stressed with work. My allergies are flaring with fall settling in. I can never seem to get enough sleep! One of these days, I will feel 100% again. :rolleyes:
 
When you have as many relationship as you do, you are always going to have problems. What is wrong with people these days? Can't anyone find someone that makes them happy enough to not want other relationshis? My wife and I settled down with her girlfriend for 38 years and watched all of our poly friends break up or get divorced over the course of 5 years. They all have been married and divorced multiple times and yet still do the same things that never worked for them before. Perhaps there are some people who are looking for something that does not exist. Perhaps a lover who is a clone of you. No one can fulfill all of your needs. You may find yourself much happier if you find just one of each sex that makes you happy. You can keep looking for the rest of your life and you will always find someone else to love but at some point in your life, you either say that the grass is green enough to make you happy or you forever search for that elusive greener grass.

I know I am a bad representative of the poly community but I did have a triad that lasted for 38 years with no problems, despite our g/f being married somewhere in the middle of our relationship. Again, tonight I asked my wife why she never got jealous and had no problem with me spending as much time alone with her girlfriend. Most wives would feel neglected or insecure. My wife said that she knew I loved her on a deeper level than the love I had for our g/f. That is what you may want to find, the one, your rock and then all others can come and go without affecting your core relationship and life.

Just posting my thoughts as this place seems filled with people who want to be poly but keep picking partners that are not all that they want. We lost all of our friends to serial polygamy. That scared us enough to just take what we had and be happy with it. We have had a great life, a fun life, a life filled with love. I hope that you find the happiness that we have. Maybe it is that some people just start relationships with people that they should not have. Perhaps you should first form your core partners and then go from there so that you always have your core family to support you. Maybe I do not know what I am saying but we lasted when everyone we know, did not. I have to guess that we did something right.
 
maxnsue said:
When you have as many relationship as you do, you are always going to have problems. What is wrong with people these days? Can't anyone find someone that makes them happy enough to not want other relationshis?
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That seems like a rude thing to say in my blog... What's wrong with me? Why don't you tell me, since you're the apparent expert.

I was very happy when I was in love with two people. I don't fall in love often, though, so since then I have dated off and on. If Hubby was on the same schedule I am and we had more than a couple of days a week together, I probably wouldn't date at all. So, whatever.
My wife and I settled down with her girlfriend for 38 years and watched all of our poly friends break up or get divorced over the course of 5 years. They all have been married and divorced multiple times and yet still do the same things that never worked for them before. Perhaps there are some people who are looking for something that does not exist. Perhaps a lover who is a clone of you. No one can fulfill all of your needs. You may find yourself much happier if you find just one of each sex that makes you happy. You can keep looking for the rest of your life and you will always find someone else to love but at some point in your life, you either say that the grass is green enough to make you happy or you forever search for that elusive greener grass.
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Well, congratu-fucking-lations on finding someone that compatible with the both of you. I honestly don't have much desire for a relationship with a woman these days. Granted, in a few months, I may be more lesbian that hetero. It's fluctuates. But the whole "having one of each" thing doesn't seem a useful solution.

I know I am a bad representative of the poly community but I did have a triad that lasted for 38 years with no problems, despite our g/f being married somewhere in the middle of our relationship. Again, tonight I asked my wife why she never got jealous and had no problem with me spending as much time alone with her girlfriend. Most wives would feel neglected or insecure. My wife said that she knew I loved her on a deeper level than the love I had for our g/f. That is what you may want to find, the one, your rock and then all others can come and go without affecting your core relationship and life.

Just posting my thoughts as this place seems filled with people who want to be poly but keep picking partners that are not all that they want. We lost all of our friends to serial polygamy. That scared us enough to just take what we had and be happy with it. We have had a great life, a fun life, a life filled with love. I hope that you find the happiness that we have. Maybe it is that some people just start relationships with people that they should not have. Perhaps you should first form your core partners and then go from there so that you always have your core family to support you. Maybe I do not know what I am saying but we lasted when everyone we know, did not. I have to guess that we did something right.
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Explain to me how to form my "core partners" when I have fallen in love 4 times in my life: 1- First real boyfriend 2 - Hubby 3- Female ex that ultimately was not compatible and ended amicably 4- Doomed which was catastrophically heart breaking for me.

I would be THRILLED to find compatible folks who wanted to be a family unit with Hubby and me. That is the POINT of me DATING. How am I supposed to find that without meeting new people?!

I don't feel like you fucking know me at all, and coming in my venting/processing space asking "what's wrong with people?!" because of my thoughts and experiences feels incredibly invasive of you.
 
I don't think I'm going to see Suave this week. We've talked periodically, but we haven't really gotten into a good conversation lately. Our schedules didn't really line up this week, although I could maybe make brunch or something short happen over the weekend... Hubby and I have some plans, but I could make time, if I wanted to. Something to think about, I guess.

Boy and I are hanging out this week, though. The weekend was awesome... Hubby, Boy, and I hadn't had a threesome in ages, and it was soooo fun! I can now say I've had anal sex with more than one guy... And that I've done DP... And that I really am lucky. Boy may not be what I imagined I wanted, but I'm really happy with my life. I need to accept that happiness and not worry so much about finding someone that loves me. Isn't genuine affection and caring good enough? Especially when it comes with awesome sex? He does spoil me sometimes, too. This weekend he brought me food while I was working, washed my sheets before he left (they were in a pile on the floor when we changed them), and then was really sweet in requesting a quiet night with me this week. Offering to bring food or cook here, but he'd rather stay in so we could just be. I told him no way was he cooking, since I hadn't gotten to feed him lately. I then pointed out that an event we've discussed multiple times was happening this week. He said he felt guilty not going yet again, but he really just wanted it to be the two of us. Works for me. I'm not really in the mood to be around lots of people anyway. :) Maybe next month we won't have an excuse....

Anyway, yes. Hubby is amazing, as always. He was a little upset about some things that happened during the threesome, but he rationalized himself calm by the time I even had a chance to talk to him about it. He apologized for being upset about it, even though I felt bad once he mentioned it. He's crazy good at realizing he's being irrational and taking steps to feel better about it. I love him, and I love how close we've been lately.

I have been a bit bad lately, though. Doomed and I have been talking a lot. Via text and on the phone. We made plans to see each other later this week, too, which I know he didn't tell his wife. I'm cancelling, though. Crossing that line is not okay, and I need to just step away. I know we're just friends and all that, but she would be very uncomfortable knowing that I'm the one he uses to vent to and as a sound board. I'm going to tell him we can't talk anymore.
 
I did decide to make a date with Suave. Brunch before he has to head out of town to meet his girlfriend for the weekend. They're plans are all fall-related, like mine and Hubby's are. :) We all thought it was funny, and if the gf lived closer would have done it as a group.

Hubby has been really supportive, even though I know he was a bit iffy when I first started talking to Suave. He even asked if Suave and I would be able to meet up late night and have an overnight to give us some more time. He's so cute when he's feeling compersion. I'm excited to go get more pumpkins, apples, and such to start Thanksgiving prep, though! Maybe we'll actually get some carving pumpkins to do something for Halloween this year, too.

Boy and I had a lovely evening in last night. He helped me make dessert and set the table while I finished up dinner (which was mostly done in the crock pot). We then just relaxed, watched a movie, and cuddled. I love that he's taken to stroking my hair when we're on the couch. He kept gathering it up and gently rubbing my neck/throat, too, which was oddly nice. He's actually coming over this evening, too, since I live closer to his work and he's not getting out of there until late. Easier to come here than go home, I guess.

That's about it around here. :) Still toeing a line with Doomed, but he's given up on actually meeting since I told him I was uncomfortable with that (and what would probably happen). He does have some professional contacts that he's going to set me up with, though, which could be helpful. I can't believe I'm searching for a job already. Sigh.
 
Brunch with Suave was uneventful. It was fun, but since we were so time crunched, we were really limited in what we could do.

I'm having the best day with Hubby, though. We went to our favorite place for lunch, then have had a movie marathon all day. Saw two in theaters (second run, so cheap) and have watched two more at home. I took a nap during another, but we were cuddled on the couch for it, so all in all there have been 5 movies watched today. It's fantastic, and lazy, and silly. We ordered takeout and bought some of our favorite snacks. We also made sure we went for a walk and were active for a bit so that the day wasn't 100% bad decisions. The snacks also have been partially healthy. :p I'm in a great mood.

Doomed called earlier, too, which was fun. Hubby was running an errand, Doomed was on his way home, so we chatted for a few.

Boy is being withdrawn. I'm not worrying myself about it and am not going to push for conversation until he seems into it. He was super sweet this week and last week, so I was kind of expecting it. :rolleyes: It's good to have caught on, I guess!
 
I'm feeling kind of down about the holidays coming up. Yarn has been acting strange lately, so I don't see myself wanting to spend them with her, which has been mine and Hubby's tradition the last few years. Boy mentioned at one point staying in town for Thanksgiving but has apparently changed his mind. I'm not sure what Suave does for holidays, but I know he has family around and a primary partner just a couple of hours away. He does work retail, though, so he'll probably be stuck working some. Maybe I can convince him to come over and make it feel more family-like...

One of the things I loved about Lady was that she enjoyed the happy family times. I wish she hadn't just up and quit so suddenly. I'm not a forgive-and-forget kind of person so that entire friendship went down the toilet when she gave up with no warning to me whatsoever. I mean, I don't blame her for deciding a romantic relationship with Hubby isn't what she wanted, but she was also trying to build a familial relationship with me and just abandoned that, too. Ugh.

So, yeah... Just feeling a little down in the dumps today.
 
I finally got my bad mood under control.

Job hunting has begun... I'm thinking about going back to school for something entirely different (something nonprofit-y), but I need something with a more flexible schedule if I want to take any in-person classes. While I prefer online, I think it will be difficult to make any connections in a completely new field unless I'm able to get out and socialize, network, and generally get to know fellow students/teachers/etc. Work drama has been ridiculous lately, and I am learning that it is all too common in this line of work. While I love what I do, I don't love it enough to get used to the petty crap from my coworkers.

Everything is going great with Hubby. We've been on the same wavelength about everything but sex lately. I'm still not as attracted to him as I used to be, so it's harder for me to get in the mood. I enjoy sex with him a ton; I just don't really crave it often. We are active enough to keep him content, though, even if he's not thrilled with it.

Suave was wanting to introduce me to his girlfriend tonight, but she ended up being sick. We're hoping to either make it happen later this week or in the next couple of weeks. They both have a desire for the more "big poly family" style of interaction but have never really had the opportunity. I would love to make that work, if we all click, but they know I won't force it. Which they respect. I may have stumbled upon some actual adults! Who knew they existed around here?! :p

Boy planned a fun night out for us tomorrow! I'm excited! It even includes one of my good friends that he met for the first time a few weeks ago (by chance - we ran into her at a restaurant). She and her boyfriend will be joining us for dinner, then he and I are going to do some activity (he won't tell me what it is, but says I will love it), then we're going to watch V for Vendetta since it'll be the Fifth of November. He knows me so well, and occasionally makes an effort! Fantastic.
 
I'm meeting Suave's girlfriend this weekend! Hubby and I will be going to his place for dinner and maybe some game playing. I'm excited, but I guess she is kind of nervous about it. She's had some poly growing pains lately, I guess, since this is the first time he has really dated since she moved and they became a LDR (they lived together for a while, then she moved out but in the same city, then she moved a few hours away). So... Hopefully that's not points against me and is just context. Suave and I have had more bantering, playful, flirty conversations via text lately which has made me feel much more excited about it. I really need quite a bit of contact to feel really connected. I mean, a few texts a day make me happy, so not TOO much, I guess. Anyway... He's cute, funny, and sweet... He somehow finds me cute, funny, and sweet... We're in a fun stage of "getting to know one another" NRE. I think the scheduling issue may be a blessing in disguise so that we don't get to wrapped up in moving quickly.

Hubby is feeling a bit frustrated, because my sex life with Boy has been kind of awesome lately. Not that he isn't happy for me, but he wishes it was affecting the two of us. As much as I hate to admit it, I'm just not as attracted to Hubby as I used to be. He's not really my physical type these days (he's bigger, but extremely muscular, too whereas the other men I've been involved with have been thinner/toned but not beefy). It's a struggle to get myself excited to be with him, even though I absolutely love the sex while it's happening. It's still something I'm working on overcoming. Hubby is, however, excited that we're going to hang out with Suave. He thinks they'll get along great and is excited to check out his game collection. I love me some geeks. :)

Boy has also been very sweet this week. Lots of compliments and reminders that he likes me and prioritizes time with me. His work schedule is about to pick up again, so I made a joke about not seeing him for months and he immediately sent a text all in caps "NO! I WILL ALWAYS MAKE TIME TO COME SEE YOU!" It made me laugh. I told him I would get the stuff to take care of his soreness while here (pain meds, creams, and a heating pad) and since he thanked me so much for the mini-rub I gave him the other day that I would make an effort to do that more often. We've been much more complimentary, intimate, affectionate, and generally caring lately which has been both nice and difficult since I constantly remind myself not to get too used to it. lol Maybe it's time to actually sit and talk about that. He's expressed a bit of weirdness with me dating Suave, so maybe we need to actually define things a bit. I must admit it's hard to explain how I'm not actually committed to Boy in any real way, yet we see each other all the time, have barrier-free sex, and talk daily.

Doomed and I haven't really talked much. He got jealous that I was moving forward with Suave when the person he was starting to like ended up dumping him because of his wife. When I decided to kick the bad mood, Doomed was still stuck in his. I'm not dealing with other people's shit so I haven't really tried to reach out past a "hi, how's your day" kind of thing to figure out where he's at. I'm sure we'll start chatting more again when he's happy again.
 
So, the meet the girlfriend night went great! She and I have a lot in common, including some mutual friends, which is cool. Due to the distance, we won't be hanging out often, but I think it'll be fun to see her now and then when she's in town for a few days at a time.

Suave is excited to get to know Hubby more, too. We already have a group outing planned for the weekend before Thanksgiving, which should be really fun. Taking him to see the coast for the first time! He's not lived here too long and didn't have the resources to go during the summer, so he's going to see the broody Oregon ocean first. :D YAY!

Boy is being funny. Wanting to explore a few things sexually that we've discussed off and on, reminding me daily how awesome I am and that he really likes me, and general niceness. It's cute.

Doomed and I had lunch. It went okay. Nothing major, and I don't know that we'll really ever do it again. We've still be talking, though.
 
I've been sick for almost a week. Ugh. I'm finally on the road to recovery, though, in large part to Boy. He has been here almost every day - cleaning, cooking (or picking dinner up on his way), making sure I'm warm, getting medicine ready so I take it on time, and just being here. It's been amazing. I'm about ready to kick his ass out, though, because man! He can drive me nuts! lol It's been great to be so well taken care of, though. Between him and Hubby, I've barely had to do anything myself, other than go to work.

That's pretty much my life lately.
 
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