Thoroughly Enjoying the Poly Life

J

jswhip

New member
Hi there! My name is Stephanie. I have been happily married for 25 years (known my husband for 30 years). We have two grown children. I am working on my degree to become a midwife and my husband repairs F-18 fighter jets.

About 5 years ago we decided that we wanted to date others and explore the polyamorous lifestyle. We had no idea how to achieve this successfully. We talked about it quite a bit, but could never really commit to anything until recently (we were unsure how to go about having this type of relationship).

Earlier this year we began talking A LOT more about having other intimate relationships outside of our marriage. We decided to go to a party one evening and I met this amazing man. We hit it off immediately. Over the next several months we continued talking and our relationship grew exponentially. My husband and I meet with him periodically to talk and play. It has been intense, but absolutely wonderful! The three of us purchased a book called, "More than Two" by Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert. This book has helped us tremendously towards having healthy polyamory relationships!

Over the months we did have some "speed bumps" (difficult times). Mostly we dealt with my husband being worried that I would leave him and some minor jealousy issues. We have spent countless hours talking and working out these issues. So far we've been successful! I love my husband dearly and have no intentions of leaving him. He feels the same way about me. It has been a learning experience for all of us.

My husband met a beautiful sweet lady and they are growing closer each day. It makes me happy seeing him explore the life of polyamory. I am still with this man I met at the party. He and I are VERY close and head over heels for each other. We are in a mono-poly relationship at this time and enjoying every moment of it. Yes, we do have our hiccups and speed bumps, but each day proves to be a day filled with excitement, joy, learning, and love.

At this time my boyfriend comes over for the weekends or we go down to see him for the weekend (he lives 3.5 hours from us). I do leave to spend the evening alone with him every so often. We have found that communication and honesty are the keys to this relationship. We are quite happy. I just wanted to share. Thank you!
 
Last edited:
Greetings Stephanie,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

That's an awesome success story, thanks for sharing it. If you ever hit any snags let us know and we will try to help. Heh, I suspect, though, that you will more often be helping others here. I think that you have the right idea about how poly works.

I hope your relationships continue to thrive and grow.
Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 
Hi Nycindie! Because Polamory is so new to us and we are still learning, we decided that my husband would start out going with me on some of my first dates with my partner. This was also because my husband wanted to make sure I was safe. My partner is fine with it and we've actually grown quite close (the three of us).

But as with any relationship, the dynamics are changing and now I see my partner alone more now that before. This has helped my husband (knowing this strange man isn't some serial killer or something - LOL).

We do get together still (the three of us), but most of the time my partner and I spend time alone together. It's worked great for us!

Thanks for asking.
 
Welcome!
 
It's always nice to see people having success at poly. Wishing you a lot of good luck going into the future!
 
Wow, impressed!

Were you and your husband both interested in opening up the marriage or did one have to persuade the other?

I want the same upbeat energy you have!
 
Thanks Loveboth!

My husband and I were just talking one evening and started discussing our marriage. We had been married for 20 years and we had married very young. We both were curious about opening up our marriage. It took us 5 years after that discussion to finally make the decision. It was interesting how our conversation about polyamory started and evolved over those 5 years. We were always open to it, but wanted to make sure we could handle the changes from monogamous to poly. So far it's been fantastic!
 
It sounds like you were both always pretty much on the same page. That's a good sign!
 
That's cool that you found someone who is okay with your husband hanging out all the time. That would freak me out...lol. Sounds like you are doing the right thing by keeping it slow though.
 
Hello!

I am really happy to hear your story. It gives me hope that things can work out for myself and my partner.
 
Thank you for sharing your positive poly story! I hope my long term boyfriend and I are lucky enough to find a happy path such as yours!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top