The "How Are You Doing" Thread (redux)

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nouryia said:
And I wouldn't have minded her just watching the show with us, but as he got up to use the bathroom, she quick lay herself out in the centre of the bed, right next to me. He came back and ended up having to crawl in on the other side of the bed and I was left sitting on the opposite edge, one cheek half off the bed because it's not that big a bed. It really annoyed me that she placed herself between us because he pretty much could only cuddle HER for the rest of the show as I was now out of reach.
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Would it have felt too weird for YOU to have gotten up to "use the bathroom," and then come back in, get next to him and say, scrooch over? :p
 
Magdlyn said:
Would it have felt too weird for YOU to have gotten up to "use the bathroom," and then come back in, get next to him and say, scrooch over? :p
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LOL Magdlyn :D I never thought of that...I guess, since she's so oblivious, I should be too.

He and I actually talked about her lack of respect for privacy and boundaries. He says she's always been like that. She probably didn't realize she was intruding and he's kind of used to her being that way. He promised he'd have a chat with her for me...he just can't promise that it'll stick.
 
nouryia said:
He and I actually talked about her lack of respect for privacy and boundaries. He says she's always been like that. She probably didn't realize she was intruding and he's kind of used to her being that way. He promised he'd have a chat with her for me...he just can't promise that it'll stick.
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It sounds a little passive-aggressive on her part, though. To me, at least, it does. Are you sure that he makes it clear that the nights he spends with you are designated YOUR TIME? And why does he have to speak to her for you? Do you feel awkward talking to her about needing some privacy when you're with him?

Also, nothing prevented you from saying to him when he got back, "Get over here, hon!" and asking him to come to your side. You're his girlfriend, that wouldn't have been out of line. I wonder why he didn't do that himself without being asked. Couldn't he have said to her, "Move over, Wifey, let me get in the middle" easily enough? :confused: Is he afraid of her in some way? It's such a simple thing.

You may also want to figure out a nice way to tell her to buzz off, just in case it happens again. Like, "Oh, Metamour, would you get on the other side of him? I want to make the most of every moment I have to cuddle with him before I go home. Thanks!"
 
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nycindie said:
It sounds a little passive-aggressive on her part, though. To me, at least, it does. Are you sure that he makes it clear that the nights he spends with you are designated YOUR TIME? And why does he have to speak to her for you? Do you feel awkward talking to her about needing some privacy when you're with him?

Also, nothing prevented you from saying to him when he got back, "Get over here, hon!" and asking him to come to your side. You're his girlfriend, that wouldn't have been out of line. I wonder why he didn't do that himself without being asked. Couldn't he have said to her, "Move over, Wifey, let me get in the middle" easily enough? :confused: Is he afraid of her in some way? It's such a simple thing.

You may also want to figure out a nice way to tell her to buzz off, just in case it happens again. Like, "Oh, Metamour, would you get on the other side of him? I want to make the most of every moment I have to cuddle with him before I go home. Thanks!"
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You make a lot of good points, thank-you. Might just try to be more assertive and see if that works :)
 
Doing okay today. I didn't get alot of sleep after I got home from taking Wendigo home the other night and as late as I slept today, I still feel drained. All I know is I better be more awake when I get home from work tonight because Runic Wolf's girlfriend and I are supposed to be sewing tonight.
 
nouryia said:
I mean, did she really have to INTRUDE? She has every other night to cuddle and watch tv in bed with him...this was MY night :(
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I was thinking about this post yesterday. I wasn`t quite sure how to respond.

I am not sure I agree with 'putting her in her place' so to speak. It is her house, and his house, right ? This is her home. Is it possible to meet for your cuddle nights somewhere more neutral, where it is equal turf ?
 
SourGirl said:
I was thinking about this post yesterday. I wasn`t quite sure how to respond.

I am not sure I agree with 'putting her in her place' so to speak. It is her house, and his house, right ? This is her home. Is it possible to meet for your cuddle nights somewhere more neutral, where it is equal turf ?
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Equal turf...we don't have. Cuddling at my house is more awkward, I have older kids that stay up a lot later and might question why I need to hole myself up in the bedroom to watch tv with him.

His kids are in bed by the time I get there. We mostly hang at his place because his other mates work later shifts (some weekends too) so he's on kid duty for dinner and bedtime 4-5 nights a week and has to be in the house until they get home from work around 9:30 or so. I'm just trying to accommodate him by going over there...not take over her house.
 
Also more on topic...feeling really heavy-hearted today. I have been having a lot of problems relating to my daughter lately...14 years old is such an awkward age...It seems the more I try, the more I fail.

She says I don't care about her and have no idea what she's going through so I try harder to check in with her and chat about her life, let her know I care...only to be pushed away/told off/yelled at at every turn. :confused:

I miss how simple things used to be...
 
nouryia said:
She says I don't care about her and have no idea what she's going through so I try harder to check in with her and chat about her life, let her know I care...only to be pushed away/told off/yelled at at every turn. :confused:
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Welcome to the wonderful world of parenting teenagers :eek:

“This highway leads to the shadowy tip of reality: you're on a through route to the land of the different, the bizarre, the unexplainable...Go as far as you like on this road. Its limits are only those of mind itself. Ladies and Gentlemen, you're entering the wondrous dimension of imagination. . .
Next stop The Twilight Zone. "

-Rod Sterling
 
The Twilight Zone indeed...lol Let's hope she still talks to me when she's 30.
 
nouryia said:
Equal turf...we don't have. Cuddling at my house is more awkward, I have older kids that stay up a lot later and might question why I need to hole myself up in the bedroom to watch tv with him.

His kids are in bed by the time I get there. We mostly hang at his place because his other mates work later shifts (some weekends too) so he's on kid duty for dinner and bedtime 4-5 nights a week and has to be in the house until they get home from work around 9:30 or so. I'm just trying to accommodate him by going over there...not take over her house.
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Make-do situation, I get it. Beware of a turf-war for sure.
 
Had a very good, productive weekend. However, I am wishing I could be of more help to those around me, that aren`t doing so well.
 
Doing okay. Not great but not horrible. Just wish I could let go of those things that cannot be and learn to be at peace with how things are. I've been driving myself crazy over silly stuff I cannot control and I know it. ~sighs~
 
Had a nice meet up in NYC with my email friend, his wife, and my husband. We are still texting and emailing though at a slower rate. Just had a nice set of days off after a long stretch of hard work, got to enjoy spending time with my kiddo, he has learned how to do so many things. I enjoy my work, but I do feel torn at times between work and home.
 
I'm doing....bleh.

One one front, it's all roses. LoveLeigh and I are still enjoying each other's company when we can, I've been seeing my friends more often, the antibiotics I'm on for my ear are likely saving me from a world of suck, and with the weather change I can go out and practice my Dag fighting more often.

On the other side my job still sucks, I'm hunting for a new one, my ear is still infected because of my sinuses not letting it drain right, my sinuses are just clearing after my yearly "Holy crap, Trees!" stuffiness and being backed up beyond reason for a week and a half, and my depression is kicking in hard for no real reason.

So yea, I know I'm not doing to bad at all, but that's not how I feel. Damn it all.
 
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