anamikanon
New member
Been in a relationship with a guy for a couple of years. We'd left it open as long as we are committed to making us work. We live in separate cities. He mostly visits me and we are quite happy with the relationship. Recently he has met someone and entered into a relationship with her. I sort of guessed spontaneously almost immediately and he reacted very badly, intending to break our relationship. I took it hard.
Turns out he was new to the relationship and had not figured out how to speak about it and reacted badly and apologized. It went on for a few days till it has settled somewhat though he doesn't want us to stop anymore.
I am an older woman who already has a child and had him at a somewhat older age as well. I was his first lover. Due to circumstances I cannot disclose here, I very rarely go out of my home. The new woman and he share many interests, live in the same city. Not having had children, her body likely feels way different from mine. And I am going crazy here. This man is family. I love him. My son loves him. He has been there with us through some rough times. It has been a pretty intense relationship. Even now, we love each other - though we haven't met since he started with the new woman.
All was going well, out of the blue we were over. Because I realized he was involved with someone (I did not react badly at all. I still don't have a problem with the relationship, per se.). He later regretted it deeply, then was insensitive again, then regretted again and it went on for a while. He didn't want to talk about her and I couldn't leave it alone - not in the sense of having a problem with it, but I needed to know what we were getting into. It was my life with being decided too between them!
He assures me he loves me and that he handled it very badly but has no intention of leaving us. But somehow, perhaps I'm not over the trauma of how the new relationship entered our life together - I am just insecure that she is way more perfect for him than we are, and eventually I am just going to end up forgotten.
We hadn't explicitly got into a polyamorous relationship as such, though it was explicitly within the scope of what we agreed - that our relationship was between us and not between either of us and anyone else. As long as we were committed to each other, all was well.
I just need someone to talk to.
Turns out he was new to the relationship and had not figured out how to speak about it and reacted badly and apologized. It went on for a few days till it has settled somewhat though he doesn't want us to stop anymore.
I am an older woman who already has a child and had him at a somewhat older age as well. I was his first lover. Due to circumstances I cannot disclose here, I very rarely go out of my home. The new woman and he share many interests, live in the same city. Not having had children, her body likely feels way different from mine. And I am going crazy here. This man is family. I love him. My son loves him. He has been there with us through some rough times. It has been a pretty intense relationship. Even now, we love each other - though we haven't met since he started with the new woman.
All was going well, out of the blue we were over. Because I realized he was involved with someone (I did not react badly at all. I still don't have a problem with the relationship, per se.). He later regretted it deeply, then was insensitive again, then regretted again and it went on for a while. He didn't want to talk about her and I couldn't leave it alone - not in the sense of having a problem with it, but I needed to know what we were getting into. It was my life with being decided too between them!
He assures me he loves me and that he handled it very badly but has no intention of leaving us. But somehow, perhaps I'm not over the trauma of how the new relationship entered our life together - I am just insecure that she is way more perfect for him than we are, and eventually I am just going to end up forgotten.
We hadn't explicitly got into a polyamorous relationship as such, though it was explicitly within the scope of what we agreed - that our relationship was between us and not between either of us and anyone else. As long as we were committed to each other, all was well.
I just need someone to talk to.