Asexual Poly?

[CattivaGattina]

Other options would be someone experienced in sickness coping, or couple's theraphy/family therapy.

I don't think I need the couples/family part because both Woodsmith and Tighearn are able to deal with this better than I am.

 

[Hannahfluke]

Bringing the topic back around to something at least more inline with asexuality. I've always been grey-A (being demi-sexual). A few months ago (I don't remember how many), I talked about how a medication had taken that grey-A and kicked it into a high gear of complete loss of libido. Ended up getting medication changed and got back into my comfortable grey-A but active with my partners thing.

About two or three months ago (at least 3 or 4 months after the medication was changed) libido dropped again (not as bad, at least now I may get a day or two I have interest) but at the same time regulation of my body temperature went out of whack, and despite eating less and working out I managed to put on 25 lbs in that time. I do plan on having my OBGYN test my hormone levels when I see her in September because I don't know if it's more likely it's related to those or the medication. If it is the medication I'm not changing it again because it works (fibromyalgia... I'd rather not have sex than be in constant pain).

But at the same time I feel really screwed up in my head. Because this go around it's that whole stupid "what are you worth to someone if you won't fuck them" thing going on in my head. It really messes with me because I don't know what the point is being in a relationship when "the only thing a girl needs for a relationship is put out". I know that if it either my medication or if it's hormones but that's not something that can be put back in proper levels (I'm 29) that I want to go to therapy just for getting myself in a better state. I know a general therapist may not be the best but I don't know if I'd be better looking to talk to a sex thearpist or an LGBT spectrum therapist.

Is the medicine you're taking for fibromyalgia Lyrica? If so, it is well known for triggering weight gain. When I was on it I gained about 30 pounds, thankfully over the course of about two years, which is comparatively slow, but I spent a lot of that two years being hyper conscious of how much I was eating and doing the calorie counting that I had used to lose those 30 pounds to begin with probably at least 6 to 9 months of the 2 years. When I was doing the calorie counting I didn't gain weight but I didn't lose it either.

In terms of the therapist, someone who has at least a basic knowledge of the mental health issues of chronic pain is useful. I met my therapist when I started going to a pain management clinic right after I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia (mine's post traumatic and started after an auto pedestrian accident when I was 25). I've found it helpful to have someone who understands the effects of chronic pain on your mental state. He gets that it plays its own role that influences everything else, which is often hard to get people who don't have this speciality to understand. I think if you can find someone like my therapist, who is an expert in patients with pain but is willing to research other areas they are less familiar with, it's probably the best, but that's just my opinion. My therapist had to do a lot of research between our first visit after a ten year gap and our second one, since we had opened up our marriage to polyamory in that gap.