Back to basics for me, I guess.
So recently I offered a bdsm scene to a dear friend of mine whom I know to be submissive. It was a mutually rewarding experience I believe, yet in the days after I felt the dizziness of falling into love, and when we talked he admitted to having been in love with me before.
This was probably to be anticipated, I'm not comfortable exploring my dominant side with just anyone. I have to have respect and a deep liking for them.
There are several reasons why I wouldn't want this to develop beyond play partners, the biggest being that he's rather be monogamous in the future and I'm not offering that to him - I need someone dominant in my life. Second reason is with my poor health I don't really have the bandwidth for two full-on relationships right now.
Now the question is, under that circumstances, do I have to leave this alone, or is it ok to offer playing together every now and then, than letting the feelings die out a bit? Is that setting ourselves up for failure and hurt?
Poly people, how do you do that kind of stuff? Are you able to have intimacy with people and not fall into NRE craziness? Or do you feel NRE but it doesn't compel you to ride the escalator?
So recently I offered a bdsm scene to a dear friend of mine whom I know to be submissive. It was a mutually rewarding experience I believe, yet in the days after I felt the dizziness of falling into love, and when we talked he admitted to having been in love with me before.
This was probably to be anticipated, I'm not comfortable exploring my dominant side with just anyone. I have to have respect and a deep liking for them.
There are several reasons why I wouldn't want this to develop beyond play partners, the biggest being that he's rather be monogamous in the future and I'm not offering that to him - I need someone dominant in my life. Second reason is with my poor health I don't really have the bandwidth for two full-on relationships right now.
Now the question is, under that circumstances, do I have to leave this alone, or is it ok to offer playing together every now and then, than letting the feelings die out a bit? Is that setting ourselves up for failure and hurt?
Poly people, how do you do that kind of stuff? Are you able to have intimacy with people and not fall into NRE craziness? Or do you feel NRE but it doesn't compel you to ride the escalator?
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