Hey lovingradiance, thanks for sharing your story btw, again, by sharing healing happens as it offers well earned knowledge and wisdom to others in need....
It is hard to fess up to cheating. I too did it and am still embarrassed and ashamed... it was years and years ago, a one shot thing, I vowed to never do it again.
What continued was my guilt about being in love with others and the guilt continued because I had the potential to do it again because I couldn't act on that love.... no problem now that I am poly. I can fully accept and feel no guilt because of my understanding of myself in the context of poly.
I don't have an issue with acknowledging where I went wrong. I know I was wrong.
I did feel somewhat stupid when I found the term poly-because I thought-GOD NO WONDER I'VE BEEN A F-UP IN RELATIONSHIPS. Because I always have felt love for more than one person at a time AND I am bi. But now that Maca and I are on the same page with one another-I feel more real than I have in my whole life.