Falling in love with someone who's Mono...

Here, now...stop that giggling! :D
 
Hey! We need more giggling! You're just trying to rain on the parade with your awesome moderation skills!
 
Difficult...

Though we can't choose whom our heart falls for, we can try to make it see reason when its simply not within our grasp.

It must be a very difficult situation for the lady in Danny40179's life too. I am mono, and trying to understand and educate myself in Polyamory. The reason for this is to be able to accept and keep the love for a friend knowing it is out of grasp. I am sure if I were to be Poly things might have worked differently, however, as mentioned before in the post, the lifestyle is not for everyone. A shift in mindset, probably helps, but a person´s past history and upbringing weighs too much at times and makes that shift close to impossible to happen consciously. For a mono person, if not aware and educated, it can turn out to be a living hell and create more doubts and insecurities rather than gratitude for the love that is being shared. For a mono too there are decisions to be made and questions to be answered, like, should I educate myself and be understanding and accept this person as is, non attachment, and keep them in my life as friends, in gratitude, or should I just go? It is very interesting to me that someone said I was punishing myself for having the expectation of a committed relationship, with love and sex, and that I was missing out. It may be true... but a mindset does not change only because someone says so or wants it to happen, if the underlying issues are not worked on. After a few years, I am now open to the task of at least learning and trying to understand.

It is very tricky, self confidence is a strict must to stay and enjoy.

Thank you all for sharing your stories and thoughts. Your contribution is very enlightening and a great stepping stone for references. Your comments and thoughts are welcome.
 
Oooooh god... BEEN there. 0_0 at least to a large extent. You're right, it does suck. :(

I'm sure it will work out though. :)
 
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