I am married to my high school sweetheart. Love him like crazy, but around 5 years ago I discovered I'm polyamorous and told him. We both have ADHD and for him, changes are a massive turmoil of emotions. I traveled abroad for a couple of months after telling him and after we both agreed to certain terms. Came back with a relationship, super happy with everything, thinking that my marriage was also thriving because he's been super nice over chat. When I come back he burst into tears, saying that he was not ready, and that we should divorce. We talked and decided we'd be back to mono again. That was 5 years ago, and after a thousand kinda-forced conversations about it, he admitted that he's not against being poly for any of us but just the change of pace makes him horribly anxious. So, I worded out for him "you don't want me to be poly because you are not okay with yourself and you can't stand it yet". Him being ND makes it super difficult to talk to sometimes and get to an agreement. I love him dearly, but while I keep waiting years for him to be "ready" I keep falling for people and having heartbreaks on my own because I can't talk about it with anybody else. I've been with him for 13 years, he's been amazing to me, but this is overwhelming for me. Any advice?