Good evening. I'm Pavel, mid-fifties, black, what you might call a bear of a man. I'm very much in love with my partner, but I am looking for something else. He's a great guy and all that. But...okay, we have and an open relationship for a decade now, and he has taken advantage of having other partners for all of that time. I haven't besides trying to share his lovers. Disasters mostly because he refused to define things and instead depended on sex to be the glue. He has said that he wanted to form a kind of family dynamic which would include me, but the young men he choose were not men I was attracted to sexually or emotionally. But recently he has started a relationship with a guy that I think is quite nice, who I like and who likes me. But I find that my partner is not really capable of having a triad, that he means to have me involved in the sex, but not really in the relationship. Which, now that I understand it a little better, I'm not into. Now I find myself in this weird position, one where I want to keep my primary relationship, but have a relationship with another person (or couple). I'm sure there is a way to describe this dynamic with a few select initials, but I don't know how. But I'm feeling a bit less odd having read a few of the postings here. Really appreciate everyone sharing their situations here. It helps in a way.