Hi everyone!
This is my first time on this page and unsure where to start but looking for some sort of community and support to bounce things off of. With Covid it’s really hard to join a support group right now so I don’t know where else to look!
Long story short, my husband and I are high school sweethearts. We’ve been together 15 years now and had an extremely loving and fulfilling relationship. About 8 months ago he had an affair and we have been working to heal from that ever since. In our healing process, where we are both putting in soo much time, energy, love, and work, he told me he thinks he is polyamorous.
At first I fought this, thinking this is the love of my life how could he need/want others. We’ve since worked together having all the hard conversations and he is now working on the previous relationship (the one from the affair) to start over in a healthy manner and one that I am a part of the process for. We’ve been working together every step of the way and he is so respectful of my process but of course we are being judged by close friends all of whom are asking the question “are you just letting him have his cake and eat it too?” I am struggling with how to unwrap that question and make sure that I am happy and not only happy because he’s the love of my life and I want him to be happy ... if that makes sense.
How do I know this is best for me too even if I do not get the same energy from multiple connections that he does and how can I be sure to protect myself but let him be authentic at the same time? Any and all thoughts are appreciated!
This is my first time on this page and unsure where to start but looking for some sort of community and support to bounce things off of. With Covid it’s really hard to join a support group right now so I don’t know where else to look!
Long story short, my husband and I are high school sweethearts. We’ve been together 15 years now and had an extremely loving and fulfilling relationship. About 8 months ago he had an affair and we have been working to heal from that ever since. In our healing process, where we are both putting in soo much time, energy, love, and work, he told me he thinks he is polyamorous.
At first I fought this, thinking this is the love of my life how could he need/want others. We’ve since worked together having all the hard conversations and he is now working on the previous relationship (the one from the affair) to start over in a healthy manner and one that I am a part of the process for. We’ve been working together every step of the way and he is so respectful of my process but of course we are being judged by close friends all of whom are asking the question “are you just letting him have his cake and eat it too?” I am struggling with how to unwrap that question and make sure that I am happy and not only happy because he’s the love of my life and I want him to be happy ... if that makes sense.
How do I know this is best for me too even if I do not get the same energy from multiple connections that he does and how can I be sure to protect myself but let him be authentic at the same time? Any and all thoughts are appreciated!