Plur and poly


New member
I’m a little surprised by the comments I’ve gotten on various forums/Reddit.
I made the mistake of equating the PLUR community with Poly. (A lot of people I knew did both)

Anyways, I’m curious about whether or not anyone here goes to EDM concerts/etc. And if so, did you first hear about Poly from that crowd?


Staff member
To help others out as these are not acronyms often used around here (I had to Google them so I'll save others the trouble).

PLUR peace love unity respect
EDM electronic dance music


Well-known member
My introduction to the idea of poly came from reading old Heinlein novels as a kid (it wasn't called poly then) and a fascination with folkrock and the historical1960s counter-culture movements and writings of that period.

I have only recently come to appreciate some sub-genres of EDM and only have been to a few concerts = probably the first was Infected Mushroom at Burning Man 2016? We've recently been to some breakbeat shows with some friends of ours who are aging ravers. (We went to a lot of industrial techno shows in the 90s but I don't know that EDM was a thing then.) Not aware of PLUR (I am older and my tastes run to music that is older than I am) but I can see how that would fit.

I think that probably what you are observing is that people who consider themselves part of any fringe, or non-mainstream, group - SCA, gamer geeks, alt music fans, burners, festival kids, etc. - are going to be more open to other "alternative" poly/ENM. There are many paths to poly and many ways to practice ENM (poly, open, swinging, etc.) - that may be influenced by who/where you had your first exposure to the idea.



Official Greeter
Staff member
SCA = Society for Creative Anachronisms


I've been into EDM since the 90s, in my 20s.

I'm also into the old industrial dance of the 80s like Front 242.

I've been aware of my poly interest since around 2002, but thought it was swinging, because I didn't know about poly. my first thinking about poly was in my first marriage to be in a primary secondary configuration, Kitchen table style with my close friend and his wife. but that didn't happen, as my friend was not interested.


Staff member
SCA = Society for Creative Anachronisms
This one, for those who have known me for a bit here, is the thing I reference fairly often in my blog…

And yeah, there’s some overlap although it’s not as much as it once was.


New member
I’m a raver and just recently came out as poly! Granted I haven’t been to an actual festival since 2017 then a club concert for ATB (that’s a DJ) in 2019 but I’m sure there are people who are poly and like EDM and I’m sure there are people who are poly who don’t. But isn’t that life in general?!

I didn’t hear about Poly from Festival/Rave goers, so idk about that. My brother has a friend who is Poly and I first learned about it through her, well that and the show sister wives. When everyone was talking about that show a long time ago. But I didn’t “know” about polyamory until my brothers friend!


Active member
Anyways, I’m curious about whether or not anyone here goes to EDM concerts/etc. And if so, did you first hear about Poly from that crowd?
I do go to music festivals, but not any that are strictly EDM. But no I didn't hear about poly first in those circles. I actually met a woman I worked with in 2017 who's husband had a girlfriend and they all lived together. Then a couple years ago when I was in Thailand I met a solo poly woman at a festival (not a rave, but maybe something similar? there were fire dancers lol) who gave a seminar on polyamory. Seemed healthy for her and relatable so when my life took that turn I didn't fight it.