starlight1
Active member
I don't want poly/open and I don't want monogamy, not much to work with within that statement.
I can so relate to this. So completely!
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I can so relate to this. So completely!
I can relate as well.I don't want poly/open and I don't want monogamy, not much to work with within that statement.
Maybe I just want monogamy with a possibility to have a crush and touch someone else sometimes
But then, who says polyamory with all it's complications doesn't ensue...A bit of touching and a bit of sex! but not with random strangers...in a warm, respectful and lusty relationship. From monogamy to poly... and so the wheel turns.
Mr Dom stayed for 3 nights in a row. I am doing some competitive fucking. It's quite fun, a nice way to end if we are to end. Saturday night sex was off the charts kinky dom/sub and crazy, Sunday was intense, and Halloween night was fairly quick and fun. I can say I gave it my best shot! He is having a weekend away with Ms Red, she had best be on her best form as I laid down quite the challenge.
In all seriousness, I do know it is not all about the sex, but I am not going dwell on regrets or what ifs for too long or too hard.
Prof is fine, still Prof, doing his own thing and asking me in when it suits him but also regularly asking for reassurances about my love for him. It's a bit odd. Mr. Wild Free and Independent!!!!!! ( but you do love me, right?)Umm. I am the one living the single mummy life with the ridiculous work schedule. My hobbies include cleaning and sex, not the stuff of which insecurities should be built!
Strange twist of fate #1 ending up 2 miles from Mr Dom and his other person in a part of the city I haven't been to in 2 years. #2 Mr Dom taking Ms Red to a weekend away to the exact same place and event I am going to with Prof. We agreed to ignore each other if we see each other Mine was planned first but I didn't tell MR DOm about it , so it is purely coincidental.
I forgot to add that Prof has invited me to meet his brother. I need to get back to him with possible dates.
Mr Dom stayed for 3 nights in a row. I am doing some competitive fucking. It's quite fun, a nice way to end if we are to end. Saturday night sex was off the charts kinky dom/sub and crazy, Sunday was intense, and Halloween night was fairly quick and fun. I can say I gave it my best shot! He is having a weekend away with Ms Red, she had best be on her best form as I laid down quite the challenge.
In all seriousness, I do know it is not all about the sex, but I am not going dwell on regrets or what ifs for too long or too hard.
Prof is fine, still Prof, doing his own thing and asking me in when it suits him but also regularly asking for reassurances about my love for him. It's a bit odd. Mr. Wild Free and Independent!!!!!! ( but you do love me, right?)Umm. I am the one living the single mummy life with the ridiculous work schedule. My hobbies include cleaning and sex, not the stuff of which insecurities should be built!
Strange twist of fate #1 ending up 2 miles from Mr Dom and his other person in a part of the city I haven't been to in 2 years. #2 Mr Dom taking Ms Red to a weekend away to the exact same place and event I am going to with Prof. We agreed to ignore each other if we see each other
Mine was planned first but I didn't tell MR DOm about it , so it is purely coincidental.I forgot to add that Prof has invited me to meet his brother. I need to get back to him with possible dates.
After last nights therapy session, the therapist and I went to the bathroom. She said that Prof is very difficult to communicate with, unclear and uses words in a way that most people wouldn't understand. Last night he used the word "or" to mean "and." He was very resistant to the idea that most people use the word "or" to mean either "A" or "B" not "A and B." It's no wonder he makes my head spin. He also had a very exact way that he wants talking about, and reconfirming, scheduling done. It really is quite control freaky.
I walked out of there wondering why I bother but yet he is making efforts with activities and asking me to go and meet his brother is either a step in the right direction or he wants me to help with the driving. One very good aspect about the therapy is having another human being recognize that Prof is not quite the clear communication guru that he imagines himself to be. I am not perfect but at least I know I am not perfect. Mr Dom came to Prof's defense and said in many way and in his own Prof ways he is actually very good and loving with me. It is mostly that he is very set on his ways.
In a interesting moment he did an impression of a conversation that he has with other women over scheduling. I told him I entirely understand where the women are coming from, I think he was surprised at that.
I walked out of there wondering why I bother but yet he is making efforts with activities and asking me to go and meet his brother is either a step in the right direction or he wants me to help with the driving.
One very good aspect about the therapy is having another human being recognize that Prof is not quite the clear communication guru that he imagines himself to be. I am not perfect but at least I know I am not perfect. Mr Dom came to Prof's defense and said in many way and in his own Prof ways he is actually very good and loving with me. It is mostly that he is very set on his ways.In a interesting moment he did an impression of a conversation that he has with other women over scheduling. I told him I entirely understand where the women are coming from, I think he was surprised at that.
Mr Dom is heading off with Ms Red for the weekend. I have not asked what his plan of action is in regard to telling her about me, asking her to do an open relationship, or going mono with her. He is however, saying very firmly that he will not break up with me. I don't se how he can be that firm when there is option C on the table, which is to go mono with her and today's additional information that he is planning his vasectomy because he plans to have a lot of sex in the near future using condoms. That would mean sex with people who can get pregnant, which is not me. I will add Mr Dom to the mix of people who speak in a contradictory manner.
And then we have Prof, who will never be all that available emotionally, will be forever time challenged, but is a very interesting person. He is also very manipulative. It's pretty obvious but also highly interesting and a repeat of familiar behavior from me.
Sex is better with Mr Dom. The list goes on... I am at the point of trying to decide who is the better partner with whom to attempt to have a continuing and growing relationship with. It is also possible that neither of them is and I am not right of either of them. It all takes up a lot of thought and time.
And then we have Prof, who will never be all that available emotionally, will be forever time challenged, but is a very interesting person. He is also very manipulative. It's pretty obvious but also highly interesting and a repeat of familiar behavior from me.
Sex is better with Mr Dom. The list goes on... I am at the point of trying to decide who is the better partner with whom to attempt to have a continuing and growing relationship with. It is also possible that neither of them is and I am not right of either of them. It all takes up a lot of thought and time.
Prof 1.5 hours late. I did, however, expect this and got all the laundry folded and put away and some under-bed, behind-the-furniture type vacuuming done. When he said he would be ready at 12pm I really did not believe him and feel good about getting some stuff finished around the house before heading off for the night. Glamping! It's going to be cooooold!
I have had a few texts from Mr Dom. I am doing fine with him being away. I always have. My annoyance is over the disappearing act and the close to the line cheating. He did admit that he disappeared somewhat purposefully, a little pay back for me "disappearing" with Prof. The difference is that I don't disappear with Prof, I always told him that I would be texting less, or may be without a signal and would get in contact when I returned. Plus he and I talk and text throughout the day, a loss of contact for 8 hours was highly unusual. It may not seem a lot, Prof and I don't text every day, most days we do send a little something but nothing like the volume Mr Dom and I. So radio silence was very odd. I asked him if it would be ok if I did it and he said no, he'd be very worried.
I can't imagine being without either of them but I am finding the maintaining and balancing of two relationships to be to much work. Older kid is currently trying to gauge if it is possible to wind Mr Dom and Prof up about each other. Younger kid is planning summer vacation trips that include Prof for one trip and Mr Dom for another. It is increasing difficult to keep them apart. There is also work. Mr Dom was a regular visitor at my old job. Prof was known at the previous job which is now my current job. I managed not to talk about my love life but it is becoming a bit obvious that I am skipping around the subject.
I have had a few texts from Mr Dom. I am doing fine with him being away. I always have. My annoyance is over the disappearing act and the close to the line cheating. He did admit that he disappeared somewhat purposefully, a little pay back for me "disappearing" with Prof. The difference is that I don't disappear with Prof, I always told him that I would be texting less, or may be without a signal and would get in contact when I returned. Plus he and I talk and text throughout the day, a loss of contact for 8 hours was highly unusual. It may not seem a lot, Prof and I don't text every day, most days we do send a little something but nothing like the volume Mr Dom and I. So radio silence was very odd. I asked him if it would be ok if I did it and he said no, he'd be very worried.
I can't imagine being without either of them but I am finding the maintaining and balancing of two relationships to be to much work. Older kid is currently trying to gauge if it is possible to wind Mr Dom and Prof up about each other. Younger kid is planning summer vacation trips that include Prof for one trip and Mr Dom for another. It is increasing difficult to keep them apart. There is also work. Mr Dom was a regular visitor at my old job. Prof was known at the previous job which is now my current job. I managed not to talk about my love life but it is becoming a bit obvious that I am skipping around the subject.
Mr Dom has still not told Ms Red and is staying with her for extra days. He is also saying that a 4 day weekend was his plan all along. He is correct in that we did not have either Monday or Tuesday night calendared. He is fudging with it though, very odd that he would not stop in for the night before he goes back to work. None if this is without purpose, however, it is passive aggressive digs. I read the thread entitled "Shame vs Guilt" as Breathemusic wrote, and along the same lines my opinion of him has dropped significantly. "If they'll do it with you, they'll do it to you." Dr Phil can be so sage I am so tempted to email her. so tempted. He says he is in cheating recovery. This is not poly/open this is bullshit. If I knew nothing about her then I wouldn't feel guilty, but I do know, I know her name, about her family and where she works.
I asked Prof how quickly he tells other people that is not exclusive and/or non monogamous, he said "Right from the get go."
I had a really nice trip with Prof. We came home early, before breakfast, as the dew had soaked everything that was left outside. We came back here and made breakfast, watched Gold Rush ( so not my thing yet so addicting) and had even more sex, a nap, and then more sex. As long as I don't expect epically long sex sessions but multiple shorter ones then sex is actually pretty good.
I am so tempted to email her. so tempted. He says he is in cheating recovery. This is not poly/open this is bullshit. If I knew nothing about her then I wouldn't feel guilty, but I do know, I know her name, about her family and where she works.I asked Prof how quickly he tells other people that is not exclusive and/or non monogamous, he said "Right from the get go."
I had a really nice trip with Prof. We came home early, before breakfast, as the dew had soaked everything that was left outside. We came back here and made breakfast, watched Gold Rush ( so not my thing yet so addicting) and had even more sex, a nap, and then more sex. As long as I don't expect epically long sex sessions but multiple shorter ones then sex is actually pretty good.
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#1 kid is in tears over the election. At one point the kids' father made a joke about moving to Canada and as Spectrumy as #1 kid is, they took it on board and I have been working to undo that belief. The bottom line is that we can't leave the county, certainly not the state, so an international move is out of the question. How odd that the court papers that drive me nuts are now the security blanket.
I booked the cheapest tickets back to Euroland for next summer. They are so cheap that I emailed my Dad the receipt and said what have I done wrong? Are they only one way? I texted Prof about my bargain of the century and he said to book him one. I ended up calling the airline to book his due to website issues and got the same price, so it is real! While there has been some talk of him coming I didn't expect him to ask me to book a ticket. It is cheap enough that he wouldn't blink if we broke up and I expect he would use the ticket and travel by himself. But still.
Seeing Prof tonight and Mr Dom all weekend. Prof was the one floating the "unavailable" boat, but looks like it will be me has other plans
I booked the cheapest tickets back to Euroland for next summer. They are so cheap that I emailed my Dad the receipt and said what have I done wrong? Are they only one way? I texted Prof about my bargain of the century and he said to book him one.
I ended up calling the airline to book his due to website issues and got the same price, so it is real! While there has been some talk of him coming I didn't expect him to ask me to book a ticket. It is cheap enough that he wouldn't blink if we broke up and I expect he would use the ticket and travel by himself. But still.Seeing Prof tonight and Mr Dom all weekend. Prof was the one floating the "unavailable" boat, but looks like it will be me has other plans
Mr Dom and I are done. We spent the night in the RV and he was a tired and miserable. The sex was pretty hot thought! This morning he launched into a whole thing about monogamy and him being a serial monogamist and our relationship having too much baggage an he would be monogamous with me but couldn't give me an enthusiastic yes, just a yes. I told him I couldn't take any more of the misery and to take me home. I have also been concerned about how to tell him that Prof has ticket to come home with me next summer, so that particular problem is solved. I am a little sad but also relieved.
I have been imaging telling Prof that I am breaking up with him and it seems pretty shitty. The therapy is starting to click and I feel we are making progress with understanding how he operates. He says he is finally understanding his own self in ways he has never understood before. He has invited me to a game with his 2 adult children and their girlfriends when the kids come to town.
How would it feel throwing myself in 100% with Mr Dom? Well, he cheats, he tells me he has cheated and he is currently skirting around the edges of more cheating. He says he feels his relationship lifespan is 1-3 years, then the sex dies off and he looks for something new. It is not inspiring me to give it my all.
So I think that is that. At some point we will have to meet for him to get his stuff back, I need to pay him for the gym membership but I have until next month until the next payment is due. I will miss the sex. It was consistently really great sex.
I keep second guessing...
I have been imaging telling Prof that I am breaking up with him and it seems pretty shitty. The therapy is starting to click and I feel we are making progress with understanding how he operates. He says he is finally understanding his own self in ways he has never understood before. He has invited me to a game with his 2 adult children and their girlfriends when the kids come to town.
How would it feel throwing myself in 100% with Mr Dom? Well, he cheats, he tells me he has cheated and he is currently skirting around the edges of more cheating. He says he feels his relationship lifespan is 1-3 years, then the sex dies off and he looks for something new. It is not inspiring me to give it my all.
So I think that is that. At some point we will have to meet for him to get his stuff back, I need to pay him for the gym membership but I have until next month until the next payment is due. I will miss the sex. It was consistently really great sex.
I keep second guessing...
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I went to bed very early and woke up a few times. Lots of thinking over whether it is too late for me and Mr Dom and weighing up the pros and cons. I have had more than a few moments of thinking that Mr Dom should meet someone that he can throw himself into, I struggle with feeling smothered and steamrolled by his strong emotions. The amount of time that that he wanted to spend in my house frequently felt excessive and he was super insulted by the suggestion that he contribute rent.
Prof is so far in the other direction. He often feels disconnected and very emotionally unavailable. He is probably not the best fit either. I feel a bit like Goldilocks. Picky picky.
Prof is so far in the other direction. He often feels disconnected and very emotionally unavailable. He is probably not the best fit either. I feel a bit like Goldilocks. Picky picky.
I have managed to resist calling or messaging Mr Dom. Both Roomie and my mum say to leave it alone, at least for a while. Mum says I need to give up on the poly idea. Roomie says I need to give up on the poly idea. But I want to see Prof and have lots of sex with Mr Dom. I miss the constant chat with Mr Dom.
Mr Dom reached out. We talked, he is coming over for the night. We are going to discuss how to take a "breather." He can take the time to see Ms Red and I can do a little dating.
I was sitting last night wondering why I hold on to the idea that Prof will suddenly develop the level of interest in me that I am looking for. He will always be too busy, there will be no "good morning" or "good night" texts. He offers what he can, some days I am fine with that and some days I am not.
It may be too late for me and Mr Dom.
I was sitting last night wondering why I hold on to the idea that Prof will suddenly develop the level of interest in me that I am looking for. He will always be too busy, there will be no "good morning" or "good night" texts. He offers what he can, some days I am fine with that and some days I am not.
It may be too late for me and Mr Dom.
I am not good at breaking up with romantic partners. My work talent is keeping people, emotions, tempers, running smooth and level. Allowing disagreement while maintaining calm and finding solutions. There are almost always solutions to keep work relationships functioning.
Trying to remember who I have broken up with since starting this blog.
Yo. Joe. Kip. and someone else who my friend nicknamed Eeyore. I think those are the only people who made it past the first few dates. Oh and the guy who cooked.
In other news... the Mr Dom visit went very well. He was very Dom, play ran the gamut of the letters; BDSM. We managed quickie sex this morning too. Communication is pretty much the same, all day chit chat.
I am looking forward to the new Potterverse movie and the alien language one. 3 weeks till a ticketed event in the city.
Trying to remember who I have broken up with since starting this blog.
Yo. Joe. Kip. and someone else who my friend nicknamed Eeyore. I think those are the only people who made it past the first few dates. Oh and the guy who cooked.
In other news... the Mr Dom visit went very well. He was very Dom, play ran the gamut of the letters; BDSM. We managed quickie sex this morning too. Communication is pretty much the same, all day chit chat.
I am looking forward to the new Potterverse movie and the alien language one. 3 weeks till a ticketed event in the city.
I forget, are you in solo therapy? It seems as though you need to work out either why you stay in semi fulfilling relationships or why you tell yourself the relationships are not working when they are what you are actually wanting.
I keep thinking of Carrie Fisher's character in When Harry Met Sally, "I know! You're right! He'll never leave her for me!" year, after year after year.
Leetah
I keep thinking of Carrie Fisher's character in When Harry Met Sally, "I know! You're right! He'll never leave her for me!" year, after year after year.
Leetah
Hi Leetah, Still doing couples therapy with the solo ones on occasion.
Good question. I put a lot of thought into it today and have thought a lot about it before.
The bottom line is usually that I change my mind about what I want. My vision of the ideal relationship or something close to it keeps changing. Sometimes I love the freedom and independence of doing my own thing in my own time, it really suits to me have Prof go off and do his own thing. Sometimes I want him to be far more involved with me and the kids. I mostly like that Prof is emotionally well regulated, he seems very level with his emotional responses. Sometimes I find it too level and do not have a clear picture of how he is feeling and what drives him.
Mr Dom was a great family man and still is highly connected to his children and also his grandchildren. He is passionate, caring and willing to be with me as much as I want him to be. Sometimes that is too much and I smothered by the emotional overflow and I need to have alone time. Mostly I am very happy with both of them. they each have different strengths but on the other hand I don't want to maintain 2 boyfriends, don't want be "out" at work and find the emotional management too difficult; both my feelings about them and what I perceive to be there feelings toward me.
The little one drew a stick figure family of mum, dad, 2 kids, dad's gf and mom 2 bfs. It was sweet but also highlighted that mum is pretty crap at making decisions. I have been with Mr Dom for almost a year. Prof for almost 4. Some days I lead with my heart and some with my head. I wrote a few days ago that I don't want Poly and I don't want monogamy. I get why people cheat; fun sex, high excitement, ignoring the feelings and wishes of the being lied to and cheated partner.
Prof will never change. I am coming to terms with that ( finally) Much of what I previously interpreted and wondered about now makes sense. It is not about me, it is how he functions in the world. I needed to see under the top layer of logic and OCD to see what actually drives him. He is incredibly intelligent and challenges me on many levels but also has a great sense of fun and we love doing much of the same stuff.
I love sex. I love the variety of having 2 partners. I like kink. they are both kinky. I am deeply attracted to both of them. I haven't lost the desire for either of them. they smell so good. Smelling Prof sends my brain pinging, there is a chemical element to the attraction. I can smell him and orgasm. that is not easy to give up.
Anyway, the answer is that I can't decide or I think I decide but change my mind. Prof, Mr Dom and Kip all point out that my decisions are unreliable. My ex used to say something similar...along the lines of... just it give a few days and try again.
Yes, at work I find it fairly easy to research, question, make a decision and mostly stick to it unless there is a major change in some factor that requires a shift.
Relationships are so fluid. They change day by day. I change day by day. I change jobs, houses, countries, I enjoy challenges. Prof is a challenge on so many levels.
Mr Dom and I are taking a 2 week "breather.' Communication will be emergency level only and when kid #2 will need to make a "thank-you" phone call in a few days. I have asked Mr Dom to make the decision, we continue or we end. I am also open to a continuing open/poly relationship, but then I don't really want that either...
Good question. I put a lot of thought into it today and have thought a lot about it before.
The bottom line is usually that I change my mind about what I want. My vision of the ideal relationship or something close to it keeps changing. Sometimes I love the freedom and independence of doing my own thing in my own time, it really suits to me have Prof go off and do his own thing. Sometimes I want him to be far more involved with me and the kids. I mostly like that Prof is emotionally well regulated, he seems very level with his emotional responses. Sometimes I find it too level and do not have a clear picture of how he is feeling and what drives him.
Mr Dom was a great family man and still is highly connected to his children and also his grandchildren. He is passionate, caring and willing to be with me as much as I want him to be. Sometimes that is too much and I smothered by the emotional overflow and I need to have alone time. Mostly I am very happy with both of them. they each have different strengths but on the other hand I don't want to maintain 2 boyfriends, don't want be "out" at work and find the emotional management too difficult; both my feelings about them and what I perceive to be there feelings toward me.
The little one drew a stick figure family of mum, dad, 2 kids, dad's gf and mom 2 bfs. It was sweet but also highlighted that mum is pretty crap at making decisions. I have been with Mr Dom for almost a year. Prof for almost 4. Some days I lead with my heart and some with my head. I wrote a few days ago that I don't want Poly and I don't want monogamy. I get why people cheat; fun sex, high excitement, ignoring the feelings and wishes of the being lied to and cheated partner.
Prof will never change. I am coming to terms with that ( finally
) Much of what I previously interpreted and wondered about now makes sense. It is not about me, it is how he functions in the world. I needed to see under the top layer of logic and OCD to see what actually drives him. He is incredibly intelligent and challenges me on many levels but also has a great sense of fun and we love doing much of the same stuff.I love sex. I love the variety of having 2 partners. I like kink. they are both kinky. I am deeply attracted to both of them. I haven't lost the desire for either of them. they smell so good. Smelling Prof sends my brain pinging, there is a chemical element to the attraction. I can smell him and orgasm. that is not easy to give up.
Anyway, the answer is that I can't decide or I think I decide but change my mind. Prof, Mr Dom and Kip all point out that my decisions are unreliable. My ex used to say something similar...along the lines of... just it give a few days and try again.
Yes, at work I find it fairly easy to research, question, make a decision and mostly stick to it unless there is a major change in some factor that requires a shift.
Relationships are so fluid. They change day by day. I change day by day. I change jobs, houses, countries, I enjoy challenges. Prof is a challenge on so many levels.
Mr Dom and I are taking a 2 week "breather.' Communication will be emergency level only and when kid #2 will need to make a "thank-you" phone call in a few days. I have asked Mr Dom to make the decision, we continue or we end. I am also open to a continuing open/poly relationship, but then I don't really want that either...
Mr Dom and I were supposed to start the "breather" last Sunday...then it was Monday, then Tuesday...I finally pulled the trigger this morning as it was heading into bring the final talk tonight. I had psyched myself up for it last night in a big way. We were going to have a final chat at bedtime and say some nice things and then goodbye until December 1st. However, the fates conspired and he wanted to put it off till tonight. I have made plans to go to the cinema so it would have to have been moved to Saturday, but that wouldn't work because...so we did it very quickly this morning, rip off the bandaid. I already miss having the mid day work vents and didn't get to send a pic of #2 kid losing 2 front teeth!
Therapy went well. Prof took the lead. Communication was the subject, it usually is. And towards the end I said that poly/open is looking more and more like what I don't want. I said it was due to the kids and work but really thinking about it, it is because the jealousy is too much to handle. The therapist asked some questions about how the kids the deal with it and mostly it is really good. They seem to have more problems around the relationship that their dad has with his GF. I can cover my private life at work by saying " I date." I am still not keen on the idea of being "out" at work . There are a few people who know.
The touching part came after therapy, at bedtime, as I was dozing off Prof said " I am really happy that we are exploring new things together." Based on some things he said at therapy, I took this to mean, happy at how our relationship and communication are improving. He is inviting me to do more things. sending me cute texts that he is thinking about me. We say I love you to each other very regularly. He says I am the only person that he sees with any regularity. We are planning another lazy Sunday together for this weekend. He asked me to look at paint colors with him and then voila, those are the ones on the walls. Why is this happening when I am strongly leaning towards doing the mono thing with Mr Dom? Rhetorical question.
Therapy went well. Prof took the lead. Communication was the subject, it usually is. And towards the end I said that poly/open is looking more and more like what I don't want. I said it was due to the kids and work but really thinking about it, it is because the jealousy is too much to handle. The therapist asked some questions about how the kids the deal with it and mostly it is really good. They seem to have more problems around the relationship that their dad has with his GF. I can cover my private life at work by saying " I date." I am still not keen on the idea of being "out" at work . There are a few people who know.
The touching part came after therapy, at bedtime, as I was dozing off Prof said " I am really happy that we are exploring new things together." Based on some things he said at therapy, I took this to mean, happy at how our relationship and communication are improving. He is inviting me to do more things. sending me cute texts that he is thinking about me. We say I love you to each other very regularly. He says I am the only person that he sees with any regularity. We are planning another lazy Sunday together for this weekend. He asked me to look at paint colors with him and then voila, those are the ones on the walls. Why is this happening when I am strongly leaning towards doing the mono thing with Mr Dom? Rhetorical question.
Hey NYC, as you say, nothing is going to fundamentally change with Prof. He loves me as best he can, but it doesn't feel enough for me. I had a nice Saturday with him and won't see him again till Wednesday. I have no idea where he is going or what he is doing for the next 3 days.
I have probably blown it with Mr Dom. We ended up talking last night, I called him. I miss him and I was sad and know that Prof isn't worth losing Mr Dom over. Mr Dom went over the reasons why we are taking the break and says he really needs the time to think over if he wants to work it out with me and our baggage or make a fresh start with Ms Red. He says he really like Ms Red and enjoys spending time with her.
I feel pretty bad about it. I had a good one and didn't appreciate him enough.
I have probably blown it with Mr Dom. We ended up talking last night, I called him. I miss him and I was sad and know that Prof isn't worth losing Mr Dom over. Mr Dom went over the reasons why we are taking the break and says he really needs the time to think over if he wants to work it out with me and our baggage or make a fresh start with Ms Red. He says he really like Ms Red and enjoys spending time with her.
I feel pretty bad about it. I had a good one and didn't appreciate him enough.
I don't think that's the way it is. You've given us plenty of reasons why he wasn't all that good for you, starting with high demands, continuing with getting bored after two years and ending with this weird "almost"cheating scenario. You were not very convinced you would go monogamous with him. There seems to be some gut instinct telling no, in addition to the rational reasons for doubt.
Good points Tinwen. The man has a long history of cheating and is forewarning me of impending relationship doom.
I feel much better at the whole thing today. I put together a Bumble profile and messed around a little on POF last night, I can't be bothered with OKC as I saw Kip and Prof on it!
Much as I hate to be a the mercy of hormones, menopause is kicking my ass and ovaries
I was all teary and sad on Sunday night, a period started on Monday and voila, I feel a million times better.