The "How Are You Doing" Thread (redux)

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Magdlyn said:
That's great NYCindie! You deserve it!

bassman, that really sucks about your job! What a bummer! Best of luck to you. As far as going no contact with your "lost love," it is for the best. I know it's hard, I went through it starting last July... I am healing well and finding myself ready to enjoy new potential loves now. I was in an uneasy place with my ex for too long, and calling it quits was a wise and healthy decision for me. There is more good to come for you in your future!
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Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu !!!!!!

If the job sorts itself out, and it might soon, then good.

Im on 15 days no contact with my love. The emptiness is awful, and the question repeats "why did she tell me every day for 18 months that she didnt want anyone else" ..... and now its all gone?

Sometimes Im ok, but mostly im not.

Thank you for writing, Magdlyn
 
Yay Dag & NYC! :D
Sorry things are tough, Bassman - best of luck with the job and tenants (ugh), and I hope things start going better soon.

Stomach bug is worming its way through here... My daughter caught it from school (probably), which Chops caught it (or a different variety) from work. I had some hinkeyness in the belly this morning, but things held together (knock wood). Here's hoping I don't catch the plague. :eek:

On a good note, the temperatures have been high enough to start melting the multiple feet of snow, but not so high that we ended up with flooding. Thank goodness for small miracles.

Work is going well... working a complicated design and leaving work with that "my head hurty" feeling, but still feeling good about what I'm doing. Can't really complain too badly.

Signed up for some meetup groups because, as an extrovert, finding solitary activities to do only goes so far. Found a bunch of gamers that meet every Monday near my workplace. Fingers crossed that this leads to some regular socializing! :D
 
The job situation is getting sorted. I sign a new contract soon, on a better daily rate, which means I will overcome the unpaid invoices within a year.

My lost love did contact me briefly. A few "how are you" messages. I can't decide if it's made me feel better or worse now though. The countr is reset to 7 days no contact. I miss her . I'm on holiday in Australia and I would love to have brought her here.

My tenants have paid a minuscule amount, but ime eviciting them . A baby is due any day now. You'd have thought that it was a time when you wouldn't want to mess your landlord around.


Have been in Melbourne for two days, and now Cairns. I'm enjoying it, knowing I have work and a more lucrative contract when I get back.
 
Okay, a little bit about my day at work today...

Today, one of the employees I manage gave me lip. Ugh, it was infuriating. But it was resolved in a way that made me feel pretty good afterward.

My boss is great. She handled the issue by talking to the employee and then discussing with me some ways to handle difficult stuff in the future.

It is a hard line to walk: between being direct and assertive without being harsh, and being compassionate, considerate, and warm without being a pushover. I'm figuring out how to walk that line, while managing not just the people, but all my other duties, of which there are many. I never thought this job would be so challenging when I first applied for it.
 
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Having a great holiday here in Australia with family too.

I am sad though, at times. I really want to come back with my lost love and show her whats here, and meet my family here. O well....
 
Poly HELL!

Well... Poly Scheduling Hell. In a way.

Chops got a new Android phone yesterday, and it's the first time he's loaded a new phone via backup (it's the first time he's had the same brand of phone twice in a row :) ). After updating his local calendar, both Xena and I ended up with... oh, a jillion or so notifications that every. single. event in the shared calendar had been deleted. Every one. Including her work schedule.

They seem to have ended up on Chops' local calendar and deleted from the shared copy. Now Xena was freaking out last night (I was passed out sick in bed with the cold DanceGirl nicely shared with me), and Chops feels like a jackass, even though he had no idea this would happen.

I guess it's a good exercise to re-populate the calendar from time to time. Oy. :rolleyes:

We may go to a multi-calendar model: Shared/personal calendars with our own stuff - read-only for everyone else, so we can see what's going on for scheduling purposes, but we can't edit someone else's events. So, for things like the kids' events or Xena's work schedule. Shared/group calendar for the truly shared events. Private/personal calendars for each of us with the stuff we don't want to (or don't need to) share. We'll see...

I can only shake my head and laugh... :p
 
It's been a long while since I've been on here. So much has happened in my life. I started working outside the home after four years of running my own online craft business. I just lost my creative inspiration to continue my craft business. And honestly the sporadic income from my business would not be enough to help with the kind of financial situation we are in now. I don't mind working, I actually prefer to be able to offer real help.... But since I also Homeschool our children and have to work around Daddy's work schedule it means I work nights closing at a restaurant. Now that I'm working I get so much less time with Daddy since we already alternate days he's here with days he's with his girlfriend. So there is few big changes right there.....

I just recently broke up with my girlfriend because she had cheated on me repeatedly. We agreed over and over that this was not an open relationship. I'm not the jealous kind and I'm poly but I just can't have a partner that sleeps with who ever is with her every time she gets drunk. She's a lesbian and even cheated on me with a man. Trust is important to me and I can't trust her anymore. So 2 years gone.

Now my life is very lonely. I feel like I'm very alone raising the kids all day, working nights so I miss out on my daddy time and I'm alone the other nights. I'm trying my best to smile and not add stress to daddy's life just because I will lonely...... But I'm really down and have no one to talk to.

On a happier note this month marks 17 years daddy and I have been together.
 
Random pop in to say: still here! I've been super busy at work, and that ended with the month end. So I've taken a week off to work on the house and get my life straightened out again. Mal really wanted to get together, but after our last visit and how tired I was I said no. I thought he and Djinn needed to work on their stuff more, and I needed some alone time. Billy went away for the week too (ironically to a city that's within about an hour of Mal and Djinn's place!) so I've had the house to myself for almost two weeks. It's been lovely!

Djinn seems convinced that she can call Mal/my relationship FWB and that's what it will be. Mal seems convinced that Djinn's definition of FWB is broad enough to include what we actually are to each other, so 'a rose by any other name...' but I still hate the phrase. I'm not arguing about it, because Djinn and Mall both know how I feel about him/them, and it's more important what we *actually are* than what we call it. But he's not my friend. He's my lover, and my partner, and one of the most important people in my life (after Billy)... so friend just doesn't seem to cover it for me.
 
Work has been crazy-busy-stressful, but going fairly well, actually. At least today was good. Getting ready for a week's vacation, which starts next week, hooray! After I get back home from my vacation, I have a second date set up with with Married Poly Guy, and I am really looking forward to it. Some other fun things coming up, so things are good.
 
I'm very happy. I have a fantastic new lover who I get to see a lot of. Another I fell for many months ago is in touch too and wants to see me. I can't believe my luck. I'm just overflowing with love right now. So much bliss.
 
A2poly - Glad to see you're still around! Nice to hear an update on how the three of you are handling all these changes.

Nycindie - I hope you got everything done that you needed to do! :)

Halcyeus - Awww, how lovely :eek:

Also feeling full of love. Jack and I have been so head over heels lately as I'm looking towards moving closer to him (for work), and him, Roger, and I living together in the future. Spent a whole weekend with him recently and get to see him again this weekend as the four of us are going house hunting in the new area. It's been incredible to see him every two weeks, and our chemistry is off the charts!

Roger and I have been busy, busy, busy, but found some time to reconnect during everything. Feeling really good about where we are and what the future holds for us. Really loving what down time we can find together.

Excited but nervous about spending more time with Taylor this weekend. We did one of these weekends a month ago, and I struggled with some jealousy/feeling excluded at times, but overall managed it. But after some talks with Roger and some inner reflection (haha see what I did there? :rolleyes:), I'm feeling more prepared this time around. Like Reverie said recently, sometimes a neutral response is totally something to celebrate, even if I'm not full-blown compersive yet!
 
Well, Mal and I had our first fight today. So that was fun. It was ok, we handled it well, but it was about something that's a pretty big deal to me (professionally and personally) and it was annoying to realize that he's pretty delusional about it. Head in the sand doesn't begin to cover it. :smh:

Technically it doesnt directly affect me, but Djinn asked me to do some work for her (professionally), and he is making it harder than it needs to be because he doesn't want to deal with it.

So when I brought it up, he tried to bite my head off about it: "I don't need this from you too!" and I wasnt having any of it. You don't get to dismiss me when I'm telling you that your actions are having direct negative consequences for you, and for my best friend too! Stop being so obtuse, and deal with the issue. I don't think Djinn ever stands up to him about this stuff, so it set him back a bit.

I'm glad that it's over, getting the 'first' of anything 'right' in a relationship helps set the tone, and learning to fight in a healthy way with me will help him learn to fight better (healthier) with Djinn too, which will strengthen their relationship too :)
 
Going back to work today, after a week's vacation - most of it spent in breathtakingly beautiful wilderness. I don't want to go to work! Waaah!

After I got back home, I had a nice lunch date yesterday with the married guy who is in an open marriage. It was our second date. I really, really, really like him... a lot. He's intelligent, sweet, polite, humble, cute, upfront about his relationships, and he communicates very well. I think we will be very compatible. There was some making out and touching, and it was good. He asked if we could go to my place after we finished eating our meals, and I told him I wasn't ready for that and that I wanted to get to know him more before I jump into bed with him. He was totally cool about it and we spent another two hours together before we parted. He texted me right after that to let me know he had a great time and that he wants to see me again soon. So, yeah!

Gotta tidy up my apartment when I get home from work tonight. Need to make the place lover-ready!
 
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nycindie said:
Going back to work today, after a week's vacation - most of it spent in breathtakingly beautiful wilderness. I don't want to go to work! Waaah!

After I got back home, I had a nice lunch date yesterday with the married guy who is in an open marriage. It was our second date. I really, really, really like him... a lot. He's intelligent, sweet, polite, humble, cute, upfront about his relationships, and he communicates very well. I think we will be very compatible. There was some making out and touching, and it was good. He asked if we could go to my place after we finished eating our meals, and I told him I wasn't ready for that and that I wanted to get to know him more before I jump into bed with him. He was totally cool about it and we spent another two hours together before we parted. He texted me right after that to let me know he had a great time and that he wants to see me again soon. So, yeah!

Gotta tidy up my apartment when I get home from work tonight. Need to make the place lover-ready!
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So exciting! This is always the BEST stage IMO. The anticipation and intensity of the new connection is wonnnnnderrrfullll.
 
Bunnie is doing super well these days.

New boy lives a distance away but he's been closely intermingled with my husband and his friends for around 5 years now. I always avoided talking to him too much because I was quite attracted to him from the start, so it's been quite a pleasant surprise that he has reciprocated such an interest.

We got to have sort of a "date" a couple weeks ago when I was in town and we ended up spending a good 5 hours together. Drinking beer, talking about everything, we eventually moved it to one of my favorite cafe's where we stretched the night out as long as possible.
My hug at the end of the night was tremendous. Twice, including a kiss on the head. :D

I've been kind of riding that wave up until we can hang out again. Our texting and communication has done nothing but increase and become more and more comfortable.

I get to see him again Saturday when he comes with a group of my friends to the Renaissance Festival. Really glad my costume has come together so well, I'm going as a warrior gypsy (kind of a Robin Hood type character). Full on corset, spandex, and all. :p


So this girl is flying pretty high right now. The attraction is overwhelming and wonderful. <3
 
nycindie said:
. . . I had a nice lunch date yesterday with the married guy who is in an open marriage. It was our second date. I really, really, really like him... a lot. He's intelligent, sweet, polite, humble, cute, upfront about his relationships, and he communicates very well. I think we will be very compatible . . . He texted me right after that to let me know he had a great time and that he wants to see me again soon. So, yeah!
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Bunnielight said:
So exciting! This is always the BEST stage IMO. The anticipation and intensity of the new connection is wonnnnnderrrfullll.
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Hmm... oh, I dont know. I'm not really anticipating and feeling all that excited about it. There is no intense, head-over-heels euphoria, nor thoughts that this is "wonderful." I do like him -- a lot -- find him attractive, and think it would be nice if it works out, but I am not attached to any specific outcome, other than hoping I'll get some sex soon. In fact, if nothing comes out of it, I'd probably say, "oh well, too bad," but I don't really care. I am pretty practical and don't feel intense NRE in the beginning stage of dating someone anymore. I hope something nice develops but I don't have any expectations. If it happens, it happens; if it doesn't, it doesn't, and I'll move on.
 
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