The Jealosy Diary

[Arc]

I remember not too long ago you having a thread in the relationship section about preparing for your spouse having sex with a meta I thought of posting this on there but remembered it was closed. I wonder if you caught this thread https://polyamory.com/threads/condoms-and-such.154261/. And being in that exploratory stage your opinion and perspective over there would be invaluable.

Hey! I did see that one and almost chimed in but then decided against it. The situation is a tricky one and I think they are making it unnecessarily complicated by trying to conceive and have more than two male partners/PIV sex at the same time. I'm in a situation where my spouse and I both are not interested in conceiving; I am no longer able to. I ended up just telling my wife that I completely respect her choice about what to do if she gets pregnant, but that I was not going to be raising another child (paternity irrelevant at that point), so if she chose to proceed with a pregnancy, that would mean a hopefully amicable divorce. She took it pretty well!

That said, I have to say, paternity still means something to me. I feel like I would feel different if I lived in a communal, hunter gatherer society where the village raised the child, but in our capitalist, nuclear family world, I am still socially conditioned to not want to raise someone else's child unless of course I consciously and freely choose to do by adoption or fostering (which I totally respect).

 

[Magdlyn]

I know it's difficult to adjust to polyamorous sex after being mono for your entire life. It must be very difficult to be your wife and her bf, adults who are being prevented from having natural release when they desire each other. But they aren't the first adults who have gone through this, of course. It's not the end of the world. But it can be crazy-making.

I guess cybersex would be one way to have orgasms together with no contact of bodily fluids. Otherwise, in meat space, so to speak, making out, touching breasts and dry humping, then going to separate chairs and watching each other masturbate to release? Would that be an acceptable compromise that would feel a bit less frustrating?