Wife Wants Temporary Exclusivity With Boyfriend

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radicaljd said:
Well, Gina's NRE with her boyfriend isn't showing any signs of waning. This past (extended) weekend, Gina and I had a pre-planned trip to go to a beach resort, about 300 miles away. I had been hoping that this would be a chance for Gina and I to rekindle our sexual connection, though I didn't tell her.

At the last minute, Gina asked me if her boyfriend could come along with us, since she hated being away from him for 4 days. I didn't want to seem negative, so I went along with that idea.

We had a nice time, and Gina's boyfriend was perfectly gracious, but Gina seems to enjoy "rubbing my nose" in her relationship with her boyfriend. For example, Gina insisted that we get a room with a king bed, and that she sleep in the middle. After I rolled over to sleep, Gina and her boyfriend proceeded to have sex right there beside me. I pretended to be asleep, but truthfully, it was quite frustrating to me.

I haven't discussed my sense of frustration with Gina. I'm afraid that if I complain, she'll just start having sex with me out of "sympathy" or "duty," instead of genuine desire. On the other hand, I wonder if my lack of complaint may be interpreted as my total lack of interest.
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Is this for real or some kind of cuckold fantasy after all, and we are being trolled?
 
I had been hoping that this would be a chance for Gina and I to rekindle our sexual connection, though I didn't tell her.
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Why not tell her? Seems more direct to tell her what you hope so that your hope has more of a chance at actually happening how you hope.

At the last minute, Gina asked me if her boyfriend could come along with us, since she hated being away from him for 4 days. I didn't want to seem negative, so I went along with that idea.
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I think you could have said "No, thank you. We planned this to be a time for just you and me to reconnect. How about planning a separate trip and then he can come along on that one?"

You saying no is not you being negative. You saying "No, not at this time" is you supporting your hope to connect with just her. How's that horrible?

Gina insisted that we get a room with a king bed, and that she sleep in the middle.
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And you could have said "No, thank you. I am not up for that arrangement."

After I rolled over to sleep, Gina and her boyfriend proceeded to have sex right there beside me. I pretended to be asleep, but truthfully, it was quite frustrating to me.
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Why pretend? They are being fresh.

Why not speak up and say "Hey, nobody asked me for my consent in this. I wanted to sleep. And here you both are having sex right next to me. How is this good manners?"

Let their poor behavior be on them. Several times leading up to this you don't advocate for yourself and your wants. How far does it have to go before you start speaking up for you? :confused:

Why are you not comfortable speaking honestly and up front with your wife?

I haven't discussed my sense of frustration with Gina. I'm afraid that if I complain, she'll just start having sex with me out of "sympathy" or "duty," instead of genuine desire.
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She can offer a sympathy fuck to gloss over her poor behavior. You can TURN THEM DOWN and say "No, thanks. I don't want any sympathy fucks. I want to actually solve problems, not gloss them over."

I wonder if you say nothing because it's kinda like "I don't want to say anything because I'm afraid it will stink, and I'll find out that yeah... she's not into me any more."

But I will lift up that you already feel stinky in this situation where you are NOT saying anything.

So pick your hard -- The stinky where you advocate for yourself, lean into this and solve it once and for all... or the one where you do not say anything and it keeps dragging on and on with increasingly poor behavior.

I'd speak up.

Galagirl
 
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Magdlyn said:
Is this for real or some kind of cuckold fantasy after all, and we are being trolled?
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Exactly. You are not advocating at all for what you want, and caving to anything she wants. This can only decrease your attractiveness to her, NRE or not. I also think that time you schedule together is YOUR time. Bringing someone else in on your time is highly manipulative and disrespectful. That you went along with it makes me think Magdlyn may be correct.
 
Exactly. You are not advocating at all for what you want, and caving to anything she wants. This can only decrease your attractiveness to her, NRE or not. I also think that time you schedule together is YOUR time. Bringing someone else in on your time is highly manipulative and disrespectful. That you went along with it makes me think Magdlyn may be correct.


So lets recap here
(1) she gets new boyfriend and decides to cut you off
(2) you agree to this nonsense with no fight
(3) you post here because you want advice and get told by some let her have her way for the time period while others call bull shit
(4) you decide to let her have her way
(5) now she escalates it by fucking him in the bed on your supposed vacation and you lie there not wanting to piss her off.

i suggest you visit a "hotwife' forum because thats where you're headed or are already there.

Seems pretty simple. Either Gina pulls you around by the nose or you renegotiate some boundaries.
 
Magdlyn said:
Ha! So he's either been married to a woman 31 years his junior, or to a woman just a few years younger. Or neither.

I love when I'm right.
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It’s time dialation, in a few months the years he was married and the age of his wife greatly increased.
 
Magdlyn said:
Is this for real or some kind of cuckold fantasy after all, and we are being trolled?
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I'm always tricked.
It's so sad ... some people really do come with unbelievable stories. Some so-called 'partners' do things you'd never think possible.
Hard to discard the trolls when real suffering could be at stake.
 
It’s bad when we have a group of people who are discussing very private personal matters and then someone comes along and decides to be a disruptive attention whore.

Not only is it dishonest but it treats things like it’s one big joke to them.
 
Has anyone actually reported the OP to the Mods here?

And Tinwen, I totally get what you mean. As I said in my previous post, the actions described were almost too hard to believe, or would have been IF not for the fact that something similar happened to me in my youth. Hence I couldn't simply assume the scenario was an invented fantasy/troll post.

Kudos to couples4men who discovered the OP's background stories didn't match across threads. Funny how the wilder the story, the more attention these posts tend to command, which only encourages the fantasists.
 
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