CuriousLearner85
New member
Hi everyone!
I'm a 36 years old man, and I'm in a wonderful relationship with my girlfriend since more than 16 years. She's 35 years old and also my best friend. In the last 5 years we've been officially opening our relationship since we have never been a traditional couple and our relationship is always changing, evolving, and it's been fantastic so far. To give you some perspective, on those years we had different relationship experiences. I had casual dates and spontaneous sex with other people. And My girlfriend had those experiences too and also had deeper experiences like polyamory or medium/long-term love relationships.
I'll start now with the main point of this Post. Two years ago, we start getting close with a married couple that we already knew. They are Jane, a 29 years old woman and John a 33 years old man, those are not their real names, by the way
During these intense 2 years period, we got really close to them, so much that I thought something romantic or sexual could've happened between us. We had and still have these days a lot of chemistry with them, we went out and made plans a lot together, had dinners in each other houses. Hanging out in groups of friends, date couples in the park. In most of these situations, my girlfriend ended up expending more time with John the same way I ended up expending more time talking, flirting, dancing with Jane.
We've built sexual tension in all of these situations, and I started to grow deeper feelings for Jane. We stare at each other when we've met with groups of common friends, we make physical contact and touch each other when we talk, we fool around a lot, laugh a lot with each other, we dance a lot together. Also, I could tell you that my girlfriend love filming us dancing salsa and bachata in a close and hot way more than once.
Sexually, we never did anything, essentially, the closest things to sex we had, were dancing Latino music that it can be with a lot of contact, and the times I've spanked her playfully. Of course always with her consent and once even in front of John to give you an idea how close we are.
It's never been a secret that I have a huge crush on Jane. We behave like a couple in many ways rather than sex. But finally, five months ago, our friends John and Jane moved out of the country. The four of us met two times already since they moved out. In part because we all miss each other a lot. These days we're still in contact with them and I didn't stop texting and talking with Jane.
We had longs and deep conversations, we send selfies from each other. We flirt through text, sharing funny/spicy videos, and we keep building sexual tension with each other.
I love what we have, and I always picture myself having a romantic relationship and sex with her.
But even with all our experiences, it's not possible for me to know if she wants the same without asking it directly. I have the feeling something needs to happen before asking directly. But I also see and know people like my girlfriend that always take action and get what they want, and I'm those kinds of people that always wait for things to happen.
My girlfriend knows about my crush on Jane from a long time, and she's been cool with that and all the things that happened between us so far. But in order to start writing also about negatives points, I will tell you my girlfriend didn't grow the same feelings and attraction for John as me for Jane.
She also has grown feelings and physical attraction, but in a lower level. She would want with him something casual and spontaneous. But nothing more than that, at least that's what she's been telling me.
Another negative point that confuse me is that Jane and John always describes themselves to everyone as a conventional married couple, and officially they don't agree with open relationships or polyamory but in my opinion those statements don't fit with all the experiences I wrote to you.
To conclude my post. I will tell you I would love to keep making plans and traveling with Jane and John like we've been doing so far. And also turn this relationship in something different like polyamory, swingers, friends with benefits, or whatever we think could work for all of us.
With all the information I gave you, what would you do, knowing what I want?
Should I tell Jane directly that I want our friend/Platonic relationship to turn in to something like a romantic/polyamory relationship?
Should I talk with my girlfriend and set up a date with them to tell them, knowing that my girlfriend and I want different things from each of our friends?
Should I ask or try something that allows me to know where she stands first? (I would love to know what)
Or should I try to be patient and keep having experiences with her/them, and maybe things will eventually happen naturally?
Thank you everyone in advance!
Love and regards!
I'm a 36 years old man, and I'm in a wonderful relationship with my girlfriend since more than 16 years. She's 35 years old and also my best friend. In the last 5 years we've been officially opening our relationship since we have never been a traditional couple and our relationship is always changing, evolving, and it's been fantastic so far. To give you some perspective, on those years we had different relationship experiences. I had casual dates and spontaneous sex with other people. And My girlfriend had those experiences too and also had deeper experiences like polyamory or medium/long-term love relationships.
I'll start now with the main point of this Post. Two years ago, we start getting close with a married couple that we already knew. They are Jane, a 29 years old woman and John a 33 years old man, those are not their real names, by the way
During these intense 2 years period, we got really close to them, so much that I thought something romantic or sexual could've happened between us. We had and still have these days a lot of chemistry with them, we went out and made plans a lot together, had dinners in each other houses. Hanging out in groups of friends, date couples in the park. In most of these situations, my girlfriend ended up expending more time with John the same way I ended up expending more time talking, flirting, dancing with Jane.
We've built sexual tension in all of these situations, and I started to grow deeper feelings for Jane. We stare at each other when we've met with groups of common friends, we make physical contact and touch each other when we talk, we fool around a lot, laugh a lot with each other, we dance a lot together. Also, I could tell you that my girlfriend love filming us dancing salsa and bachata in a close and hot way more than once.
Sexually, we never did anything, essentially, the closest things to sex we had, were dancing Latino music that it can be with a lot of contact, and the times I've spanked her playfully. Of course always with her consent and once even in front of John to give you an idea how close we are.
It's never been a secret that I have a huge crush on Jane. We behave like a couple in many ways rather than sex. But finally, five months ago, our friends John and Jane moved out of the country. The four of us met two times already since they moved out. In part because we all miss each other a lot. These days we're still in contact with them and I didn't stop texting and talking with Jane.
We had longs and deep conversations, we send selfies from each other. We flirt through text, sharing funny/spicy videos, and we keep building sexual tension with each other.
I love what we have, and I always picture myself having a romantic relationship and sex with her.
But even with all our experiences, it's not possible for me to know if she wants the same without asking it directly. I have the feeling something needs to happen before asking directly. But I also see and know people like my girlfriend that always take action and get what they want, and I'm those kinds of people that always wait for things to happen.
My girlfriend knows about my crush on Jane from a long time, and she's been cool with that and all the things that happened between us so far. But in order to start writing also about negatives points, I will tell you my girlfriend didn't grow the same feelings and attraction for John as me for Jane.
She also has grown feelings and physical attraction, but in a lower level. She would want with him something casual and spontaneous. But nothing more than that, at least that's what she's been telling me.
Another negative point that confuse me is that Jane and John always describes themselves to everyone as a conventional married couple, and officially they don't agree with open relationships or polyamory but in my opinion those statements don't fit with all the experiences I wrote to you.
To conclude my post. I will tell you I would love to keep making plans and traveling with Jane and John like we've been doing so far. And also turn this relationship in something different like polyamory, swingers, friends with benefits, or whatever we think could work for all of us.
With all the information I gave you, what would you do, knowing what I want?
Should I tell Jane directly that I want our friend/Platonic relationship to turn in to something like a romantic/polyamory relationship?
Should I talk with my girlfriend and set up a date with them to tell them, knowing that my girlfriend and I want different things from each of our friends?
Should I ask or try something that allows me to know where she stands first? (I would love to know what)
Or should I try to be patient and keep having experiences with her/them, and maybe things will eventually happen naturally?
Thank you everyone in advance!
Love and regards!