For sure! I am jealous of what you all have so that is what we will work towards
You are seeking a triad, where each partner is sexually involved with both other people. If you are truly seeking polyamory, all 3 people would have to be in love with both others, as well. This is the most difficult long-term relationship to attain and especially maintain, as there are so many moving parts. Usually 2 of the partners tend to pair off when the unicorn (in your case, the female you seek) prefers one guy over the other.
Brief sexual threesomes do happen but they don't tend to last long.
MFM triads, where the guys are not romantically or sexually linked, such as in Kevin's case (and also Bluebird, see her blog in our journal section) tend to have good longevity, since women tend to make better hinges than guys.
Personally, I am in a poly network. I'm a femme non-binary person. I have 2 partners, one F, one M. They are not sexually or romantically linked. My F partner has a bf who has no other partners and isn't seeking one. My male partner is open to dating but not seeing anyone else currently (not for lack of trying).
The huge majority of polyamorists do not date as a unit. Most people are afraid of dating a couple, for good reason.
You might want to read this:
This article is a long, technical discussion of what being a "Unicorn Hunter" means, what's wrong with it, and how people in such a situation can try to avoid the negative stereotypes associated with such behavior and get the things that they are ultimately looking for. It is written in a…
davidlnoble.livejournal.com