Hello all...Hoping to be accepted!

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polywifeNmonocuckhubby

New member
Greetings all!

So, this is my first time posting and QUITE nervous about it. I guess, partly as want to find our niche where people accept us, and understand that YES eroticism does play a part in our relationship, however...we live the lifestyle 24-7, and frankly through counseling with a kink aware therapist years ago...my husband and I were finally able to be honest with each other and how this life has shaped us. So...what is our definition, if there is one? Here is our background.

I am (the wife) 28 years old, and my husband is 31. We married young, at when I was 18 years old and he was 21 years old. The usual problems developed (those seem like ages ago!) and there was some infidelity on MY part. Now, to what came out of therapy. We love each other unconditionally, however my husband has come to terms with he is and always will be mono, and frankly a cuckold. (please do not assume this is all sexual in nature and dismiss us right away.) He is a loving husband, and Daddy. I could not ask for a better stay at home beta male husband. His life is pretty much grocery shopping, changing diapers, nap times, and juggling the house. I am the bread winner, and fortunate enough that we live a comfortable lifestyle which gives us some breathing room.

While I was in college, I had an affair with a 48 year old man (I have always been attracted to older.) My husband found out, and we both had many feelings to deal with. Frankly, he was confused as....he actually welcomed hearing about it, and the confusing emotions it brought. After we were able to "put to bed" the jealousy feelings, and how I do love my husband, and the emotional bond we have, he was able to separate my "wants" and what makes me comfortable.

He is an amazing husband and Daddy...and we now feel we are more of a poly lifestyle (if that is possible with him remaining mono). We are moving to San Francisco for my employment this June, which gives us some breathing room from the norm of the neighborhood we live in now. Hopefully we can have a "re beginning" as such more open and public. I definitely am lucky to have such a loyal marriage, and a husband who would welcome a full time Alpha male, and a Polyandry? relationship into our house. Thank you for listening, and we look forward to exploring the site.
 
Greetings polywifeNmonocuckhubby,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

As far as I am concerned you are accepted, and I am happy for you guys as you have found a life that works for you and makes you happy. If you have any questions or concerns along the way, just let us know.

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 
Personally I think it's great that you worked through the initial confusion to a place where you're both cool that hey, this is what you like, what you want, what makes you both happy. And I hope you find a more tolerant environment when you move, than the one you came from.

Best wishes, and best of luck! :)
 
Thank you.....We will, find a more tolerable environment there. My hubby still has some angst, or jealousy? I should say...but we TALK about it...he is never angry, I guess more about inadequate things, that frankly won't change. I am hoping he reaches out to other beta males here, to discuss. I am guessing..it is okay, or safe to mention the cuckold aspect of it here?

I love him, and he takes care of the home, the babies, and frankly my boyfriend so well!
 
polywifeNmonocuckhubby said:
Thank you.....We will, find a more tolerable environment there. My hubby still has some angst, or jealousy? I should say...but we TALK about it...he is never angry, I guess more about inadequate things, that frankly won't change. I am hoping he reaches out to other beta males here, to discuss. I am guessing..it is okay, or safe to mention the cuckold aspect of it here?

I love him, and he takes care of the home, the babies, and frankly my boyfriend so well!
Click to expand...

I'm not a mod or anything, but I don't see why not. I talk about the BDSM stuff I'm into here sometimes and no one has fussed at me. I try not to get TOO explicit, mind you. But I don't think you're being too scandalous in talking about the cuckold stuff.

People like what they like. So long as you can discuss any uncomfortableness that occurs, and work through it, and you actually respect each other's needs...*shrug* It's cool!
 
polywifeNmonocuckhubby said:
I am guessing..it is okay, or safe to mention the cuckold aspect of it here?
Click to expand...

I don't see why not. I don't know if there are many men who are also cuckolds on this forum, but one never knows. If he is open to reading thoughts from people who are not cuckolds, or even kinky, then that would make it easier on him to post here.

Have you two looked into Fetlife? Cuckolding is a pretty common fetish and there must be many groups on Fetlife dedicated to various aspects of it.
 
Yes we have (Fetlife) as well as there is a great information site out there, by a guy name Luvr who runs cuckold marriage.

He is open to hearing from others, I guess concerning the whole dynamic of my boyfriend moving in, a more integrated family.....Very lucky to have both my husband, boyfriend, and of course my beautiful children!
 
Hello, and welcome!

As far as I can tell, after a few years here, the community seems fairly inclusive (except to "abusers") - if everyone in a relationship is being respected and getting what they need in a relationship then...all is good:p.

Although we don't ID as "kinky" I do see some echoes of my relationships in yours. MrS and I also got married young - I was just 22 and he was 23 (this was almost 20 years ago). I am the primary bread-winner for our "chosen family". MrS is likely mono (but poly-friendly), he understands my needs and wants probably better than I do. He, after a period of turmoil, was willing to adjust his world/life-view in order to be happy with welcoming Dude, my highly sexed, stud-ly BF (and his BFF), into our household.

We have been living as a Vee (emotional triad?) for 5 years now, and all is good!
 
Hi Polywife, welcome.

I am not sure what you're looking for here, if you've found good support in the cuckold community for some time now?

So, you have a boyfriend, and a husband. Do you 3 already live together? Will your boyfriend move to SF with you and your husband? Does your boyfriend have a good income too? Will you buy a house with him, blend finances? Does your boyfriend want to make a baby with you? Do you want to discuss any of that? Start a thread in the Relationship section. Do you just want to vent, write down your thoughts and feelings? Start a blog in that section. Do you just want a new community? Answer questions on threads. Chitchat in the Fireside section. Talk about your spirituality in that section. Whatever you want, you're welcome!

If you are looking for new terminology other than, hotwife, cuck/beta husband, older studly boyfriend, you could say, you are in a mono/poly relationship. You're poly, you can love more than one person at a time. Your husband is mono, he is devoted to you. And what about your boyfriend? Too new? Remains to be seen? Maybe you are the "hinge in a V." But if your husband, in "taking care of" your bf, is also emotionally and/or sexually involved with him, if the men are attracted to each other (bisexual), your h may not be as mono as you say. Maybe you 3 are in a triad, not a V. I have read enough about cuckoldry to know some cucks don't just get to listen from the other room, or hear the details of the sex their wife had with her other, but can watch their wife get fucked. Some get to fluff the bull. Some get to clean both the wife and bull up after they have sex, or actually stimulate them orally during the act. Doesn't matter to me, but if your h gets to do any of this, the description of him as mono goes a bit fuzzy.

As far as being accepted here for having a cuckolding fetish, it really doesn't matter. There are lots of kinky people here (including me). And though it isn't often talked about, I am sure some of us might get a bit turned on to think of our partners having sex with their other partner(s). For example, my girlfriend can get turned on texting with her boyfriend. We live together. Her boyfriend lives 20 miles away. She only sees him twice a month. So who does she come to for release when her boyfriend turns her on? Me, sometimes. And if my boyfriend is here, and we have sex down the hall, and my girlfriend can hear us, and wants sex with me after he leaves, probably at least partly from the sounds we made (spanking sounds, moaning, etc.), I am not going to complain! And if I imagine the kinky activities my gf does with her bf (Master/sub, bondage, sensory deprivation, etc.) I might get a little aroused myself, and desire her more.

It's all good.

We can report a bit of what we did with our boyfriends, and it doesn't cause jealousy. It might cause a little envy! lol. So it might inspire her and me to go further, be more adventurous and experimental, in our own sex life.

So... long story short, consensual kink is allowed here, whatever form it takes. Getting turned on by your partner's relationships with other partners, it happens sometimes. No big deal.
 
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We have had a few members here who are into cuckoldry, but most haven't posted in a while. And there are lots of memvers who never post but do read regularly and send private messages to others behind the scenes. You are certainly welcome to talk about your situation here, but the responses you get will probably focus on the poly aspect, mostly.

Welcome!
 
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