How open are you about being polyamorous?

A

azurebonds

Active member
I am just curious how open members of this forum are with other people about being polyamorous, either as in a relationship structure or as an identity.

For me, I wouldn’t expect issues at my employer or in my community; however, I would expect them with my extended family.
 
Myself had "poly tendencies" since I was very young, even when I was a little kid I had multiple "boyfriends." So when I came out to everyone, no one was really surprised when I said I was polyamorous.

All the people in my environment know, I have zero interest in editing my speech or poly life for the sake of someone else. If people don't feel comfortable to be around me or my partners I will gladly show them the door, but as for now I have not had to do that, as I usually prepare people with a "poly talk" and a lot of people are very understanding. It's also becoming pretty mainstream in my country now, so I do not have a lot of issues, but I can imagine other people would have, and approach it differently.
 
Last edited:
The only person we actively hide it from is my MIL. And therefore anyone who would tell her. That's a very small group of people.

I'm out at work, with my friends (bff was super weirded out at first but her hubby told her to pull her head in), and with my family.
 
azurebonds said:
I am just curious how open members of this forum are with other people about being polyamorous, either as in a relationship structure or as an identity.

For me, I wouldn’t expect issues at my employer or in my community; however, I would expect them with my extended family.
Click to expand...
I dont "identify" as poly. Its just a relationship construct I enjoy being in.

I work in the us primarily. I am not comfortable sharing very much of anything about myself to my us co-workers haha
 
When Pumpkin and Cookie were out on a date, they were seen by an old coworker/friend of Cookie's. Cookie introduced Pumpkin as her girlfriend. This is the first and so far only person that she has been out to, but she knew that it was a safe person to tell. Cookie is nervous about coming out, not only as poly but as bi, or pan.
I don't care what anyone thinks, but I don't want to cause my mom any grief, and I don't know if it would cause me any trouble at my job. Of course it shouldn't, but you never know who would get upset and find a reason to get rid of you. There was a woman once that tried to get my boss fired because his shirts were too tight. He enjoyed bodybuilding, and even though he was wearing proper business attire, his dress shirts were tight against his muscles. Well, this one lady found it offensive and created a hostile work environment. HR told him he had to start wearing loose clothes. His response was along the lines of 'forget you,' and they began the termination process. Legal stepped in and stopped HR from opening the company up to a lawsuit, but it caused a lot damage to his work ethic and company loyalty. My point is, there might be someone that takes offense, and decides to make a problem.
Before we were "dating", when she was still just a friend, I took Pumpkin to the church fundraiser dinner simply because it was food that Pumpkin and I like, and Cookie does not like. Well, it was the talk of the town for the rest of the week between the old church ladies. They already knew her as a family friend, that sits with us in church every Sunday, but seeing her out with just me was a micro scandal. Imagine the reaction if they knew what we were up to now.
 
Hello azurebonds,

I am mostly in the closet about being polyamorous -- not counting this forum or a local poly group I used to participate in. One brother knows. And his ex. And a friend of my partner. And that's it. I'm not worried about consequences to me personally, but my partner and metamour are worried about risks to their jobs and getting disowned by family members. I respect their concerns and their wishes.

Regards,
Kevin T.
 
Out to all friends, some relatives, and like one coworker. (I really do need to come out to the rest of the coworkers but now I’ve been there long enough that it feels weird to say something now.) Mostly that’s worked out well.
 
I'm very in the closet about being poly and my sexuality. I set up a new Twitter to avoid all my old friends who, along with my ex, were part of the problem. Then I recently found this place.

For financial reasons, I'll never tell my parents. They are 80 and one is terminal. My divorce is costly. So, in the current climate, I'll happily play pretend to my bigoted parents until they pass.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top