Mourning my lost relationships & looking forward

Woke to an email from the coordinator of the Dec 8th event saying that after they reviewed my application & I did fill out it correctly. She apologized and I am back on the vendor list.
I am very realived that I was able to stand up for myself & my business.

Later today I am to have a hooky nooky day w/JR. I need it before my next event vendor tomorrow.
 
Another event done for this year. Somewhat better than the last, as I made my table fee. I will definitely do this one again.


Last night was absolutely wonderful. Saw "Last Christmas", great chick flick. Then Italian food for dinner and some serious snuggle time ;). JR is such a great guy. I am so happy. :D
 
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OK, so the coordinators that contacted me have not gotten back to me, even after 2 emails. Because of that I have contacted another Holiday/Craft fair for the same date. So now it's a matter of timing of just who is going to get the spot.
Just luck & no events scheduled, has given me this weekend off for Thanksgiving. Dexus decided to be with his father & step-mom. They are going to New Zealand from mid December to early January. So Dexus will be over alot during that time. Which I don't mind at all, Yay Mother/son Time! <3 :)
 
Happy Merchant Dance! & the trials of small business

**DING DING DING** Looks like the new event has won the spot. They have contacted me back within a 1/2 hour. Now comes the application process/waiting. *bites nails nervously*


And just for the shits & giggles of it I checked my email. The original event finally emailed back & they have already secured a soapmaker for their event.
W T F!!!

You contacted ME. And now you tell me some other soapmaker is scared of competition?! FUCK YOU!
 
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The Holidays & introducing new partners to the family:
When having my weekly lunch date with JR, the discussion of the holidays came up.
I had asked how he would introduce me to his parents &/or his family for the holidays. Would he just go and blurt out "Hey Mom, Dad. This is Valynn and she is my girlfriend." And then let the chaos ensue? And he replied "If I had my way, you wouldn't ever meet them."
Now, I didn't get the feeling that he is ashamed of me & our relationship. What I got from that statement is he was thinking of protecting me from them & their opinions of me. I don't care what their opinions are. As long as he & I have a solid relationship is what matters.
And he has met almost all of my family already. So there is nothing to worry about on my side.

I am fully out of the closet as a bi, poly, Pagan woman. So my family members just kinda gloss over how 'strange' I am.
JR on the other hand is new to poly, from an ultra Conservative Republican Catholic family. He is still navigating turbulent social waters.
 
Sounds like Artist’s family - I’ve met his sister, who is awesome, and I’m most likely never going to meet his father and stepmother for similar reasons. But considering how little Artist’s father knows about the real him and how sort of pro forma their relationship is on many levels, I don’t really see the point of getting upset about it.
 
Sounds like Artist’s family - I’ve met his sister, who is awesome, and I’m most likely never going to meet his father and stepmother for similar reasons. But considering how little Artist’s father knows about the real him and how sort of pro forma their relationship is on many levels, I don’t really see the point of getting upset about it.

For me at this point in our relationship, I knew that meeting his family was going to be difficult. I was asking as a "future goals" in the future type situation.
Another 'problem' for JR is that he is an only child so he feels he is over scrutinized for his life choices. He went down a dark path in his teen's & early 20's (drugs & alcohol), and has since gotten himself out. But his family seems to never let him live it down. I told him if I was there when they did that I would turn the conversation around to celebrate his sobriety. But I am the type to stick up for the underdog.
 
Continuing with the holiday theme:

I have come to the realization that I feel a bit depressed now that the holiday season is upon us. I know that there is no way, as the current situation stands, that JR & I would be celebrating together. Plus he chooses to work all of the holidays, so I really can't complain anyway. But that doesn't stop the ache I feel. But I will deal, cause I really have no choice otherwise.
 
I confirmed with my niece's fiancee that he will be able to drive me to a third vending event for Dec 15th. So more happy merchant dancing! Things are looking up & my business name is getting out there. Yay!

On a side note I must get my drivers license next year. Having to make sure I can get to events is frustrating. If I make ONLY ONE RESOLUTION, getting that will be it.
 
Getting old SUCKS ASS. I got a new memory foam topper for my mattress. And as I was getting off my bed earlier, my right wrist buckled. It irritated a Ganglion cyst on my tendons of my wrist. So now the first two fingers shoot pain up my arm every time I use it. In precaution I took off my rings. And I am now wearing my wrist brace & tennis elbow sleeve.

I keep joking when I do things, I do them spectacularly "well". :rolleyes: Also the dramatic change in the weather here in NY doesn't help matters much. Hopefully I will get some pity looks at the events I will be doing next weekend.
 
Ongoing SHIT living w/Elaine:

My sister has decided to try & curry more favor with mom & my eldest niece (her birthday is tomorrow), by making Sunday dinner roast beef. Banging pots and pans as she went.

So for some ungodly reason Elaine cannot cook and clean up after herself. So my mom asked me to put a load of dishes into the dishwasher. I do so with my sore arm without complaint. But as I finished I saw a pan with 4 cinnamon rolls in it. Knowing I would not get a chance of having some otherwise, I nabbed one.

Elaine is now LIVID that I dared to take a roll. And is now griping all over the house, about how I was inconsiderate. I really didn't think this would be such a problem but Gods, don't act like I am a person with leprosy and I contaminated her precious Pillsbury canned cinnamon rolls.
 
So, I am on edge about the Saturday event coming up. Elaine has offered to drive me to it. But she has a history of conveniently forgetting about me or my events in the past. Hopefully since she wants to bring her kids to the event she will not fuck me over. Time will tell.
 
WOOT! Soapy Expansion!

I just scored a really good deal for my soaping business. Lots of fragrance oils (scents), foaming bath whip base, unscented hand sanitizer, and other body bases. Plus some mixing bowls. ALL FOR $100.00!! I am so happy!

6 boxes tomorrow & a 7th when she can get the movers to find it.
 
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This past weekend was a HUGE success! $$$
I made enough the first day via credit card sales to afford my new business cards! I was even able to get ahead paying off my personal credit cards.


Elaine has been good...... almost too good. She did take me to the event on Saturday without complaining at all. And today she even bought me breakfast from Burger King. I wonder if it is just for the holidays, or if she has finally realized that I am actually an equal. I really doubt it. Cause she has gone through a similar phase before. We shall see how this pans out. But I feel it's just like Angela (they are born 4 days apart) so they are both Vigros. Sue me I follow the Zodiac, cause it has yet to let me down in understanding some people.
 
A wonderful start to my "slow" season XD

Turns out the score of soapmaking supplies was 7 boxes. Most of the haul was 1oz bottles of fragrance oils and at least 25, 16oz of hand santizer. A couple of boxes had 2, 1 gallon bottles of hair conditioner base. And 3, 1 gallon bottles of foaming bath base that I can make into shaving soap.

I now have to make a full inventory of my original supplies. I have to see what I need to get in the near future and get those orders done. Like medium sized clear plastic storage tubs so I can put fragrance oils in and be able to access them when I want to. Instead of having them in cardboard boxes, 3 layers deep.

I also need to get the shelving and the rest of my stuff from the apartment.

Speaking of which.....

Things have been breaking down between JR & Angela. He tells me that they are constantly fighting now. He is of the opinion that after the holidays he is going to find his own apartment and move out. He originally didn't want to loose the security deposit, but at this point he just doesn't care about that anymore. His sanity is more important than money.

It might not be a bad idea to block Angela's cell# on my phone so she doesn't rage spam text me at 5AM again if/when they break up. I hate that I feel that I need to take these precautions. But I'd rather do this now than to be rudely awakened to her text-yelling at me, like in September.

I have been listening to a poly podcast called Multiamory for the past few days. They are a bit young for my taste (late 20's to early 30's), but do have alot of experience between the 3 of them.
 
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So Furious!

My cat Jessicat is the Grand Queen of the household at this point as the eldest cat of 4. She has been loosing ALOT of weight again & I am afraid that she needs her thyroid meds changed which I don't think I can afford right now. So since her appetite is ENORMOUS we feed her 4 times a day.

Today, I have found that Lucky, Elaine's cat scaring Jessi away from her food. And I was telling Elaine about it, she made it sound I was making a this situation bigger than it was. Talking to me like I was an idiot and that I didn't know what I was talking about.
She didn't want to hear that her cat was bullying my cat right before her eldest son's 15 birthday (tomorrow). Whom she calls 'the cat whisperer'. She doesn't want to upset him.

So my cat can get thinner & ill because of Your cat's behavior. So my TEENAGE nephew's feeling aren't hurt? OMGs what a fucking CUNT.



I cannot wait to go over & apartment sit for my ex husband with Dexus on the 19th. It will be a mini vacation cause I actually don't know when I will be back, possibly not until 2020. I kinda wish I can bring Jessi over, but that would be too much.
 
Talking with my mom today. And she asks me if I remember "the magic chocolate box". I told her no. And she says "Oh, .......ok. I guess we did that with your older sisters." Also Elaine will remember something from her child hood and say 'don't you remember?' And then look at me like I have 3 heads when I sigh and say no.

And that made me think. "No. I don't remember things that I never participated in or was too young to remember. There was alot of things you & Dad did with my sisters that you didn't do with me." And it hurts, but I can't tell them that way I want cause it will make me look like a bitch. My mom is trying to remember something happy and I am ruining it. And this is happening ALOT.
 
YAY, more Yule/Christmas Gifts

Just talked with a friend & customer of mine. She is willing to help design & setup a website for my business. I am so happy right now! She will be coming over on Tuesday afternoon to discuss it all.
 
So freakin excited!!! NBRE!!!(New Business Realization Energy) LOL.

This business meeting with my now web designer, was absolutely wonderful. She saw my vision for my website immediately."Medieval shoppe meets modern rustic chic. With ambiance medieval background music."
She said she'd have a mock-up for my review after the new year.

Huh, maybe I should change the name of this blog, if possible. It's not really mourning anything anymore. :D
 
Very happy for you!

Huh, maybe I should change the name of this blog, if possible. It's not really mourning anything anymore. :D

I don't know that you can change the name of the blog, but it is not unusual for folks to start a new blog when the old one isn't as relevant - my Journey blog was more of a narrative history, while by Notebook blog is more of a current events bulletin board. You can post a link to your new blog in your old blog and vice versa, so people can get the history or look at updates.
 
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