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It's OK to leave a man broken if you're done with him for the night. Don't want to have him wear out before I am done with him, lol!

Punk's body is so... hard. I've been with muscular guys before. Nick has a physical job and is very fit and lean. Darkwing works out and is super muscular. Punk doesn't work out, but he does work as a builder as his health allows. He does wood inlay and mosaic projects for fun. He does have a cute little belly, but even his belly is hard. He is just naturally made of hard muscle. It's very sexy and masculine. Mmm... sigh. He is of Mediterranean descent, Italian and Jewish. His full head of hair is black and curly and he complains how it has a mind of its own. I just know it's gorgeous and as fun to grab onto as his hard body. He has a nice goatee, and a very mischievous look about him.

We were texting yesterday about the project we worked on our date. I also made sure to tell him how much fun our date was. He responded, "Hell yeah it was." Made me feel all tingly. Oh, the NRE, when you're still on the edge of trusting someone and wondering like a schoolgirl, does he like me as much as I like him?

miss pixi had another awesome date with her Master. They continue to deepen their relationship. All systems go for both of us right now. (knock wood)

Today miss p, has therapy and a dental appointment at our clinic in Boston so I am going to drive her in. Then we will drive to the coastal town my daughter moved to recently for a visit. She and her husband applied for subsidised housing and got into a place. She's lucky to live right near the ocean now!

We haven't seen her in a while, since the summer. I get to see pix of her baby daughter on Facebook, but getting together with her is stressful, mostly because of her husband, who is a challenge to hang out with. He's not too bright and just weird. But I am looking forward to seeing her and the baby, who is 10 months now, almost 11 months! She's a blonde angel, very happy and easy baby. I chatted with my daughter and she gave me the go ahead to get the baby some clothes. So I went kind of nuts in Savers finding cute little girly outfits. Got some fancy cookies and chocolates for daughter and her hubby too.
 
I'm so glad things are working out for you and Punk! You're kind of my idol, all these younger guys and Ms Pixie, too ;) I hope you have fun snuggling your granddaughter... babies are so sweet :)
 
I'm so glad things are working out for you and Punk! You're kind of my idol, all these younger guys and Ms Pixie, too ;) I hope you have fun snuggling your granddaughter... babies are so sweet :)

For sure pink pig, mags is like the big sister I have always wanted. Haha. You and pixie rock this!
 
Glad things are so good for you with Punk, and that miss pixi was able to get together with her Master!

I'll wave up--or would it be down?--the coast at ya, if I can see through the fog the weather says is rolling in over the harbor. (Can't see the harbor from my apartment, but it does look cloudy and kinda fuzzy in that direction right now...)
 
I'm so glad things are working out for you and Punk! You're kind of my idol, all these younger guys and Ms Pixie, too ;) I hope you have fun snuggling your granddaughter... babies are so sweet :)

For sure pink pig, mags is like the big sister I have always wanted. Haha. You and pixie rock this!

Awww, thanks Pink and starlight, you're so sweet.! I am just bumbling along with this dating thing. My granddaughter was a delight yesterday, my daughter seemed calmer, happier, healthier and more with it than she has in years, the son in law was easier to take now that I know how he thinks. We had a really nice evening together. Their new apartment was roomy and cute.


Glad things are so good for you with Punk, and that miss pixi was able to get together with her Master!

I'll wave up--or would it be down?--the coast at ya, if I can see through the fog the weather says is rolling in over the harbor. (Can't see the harbor from my apartment, but it does look cloudy and kinda fuzzy in that direction right now...)

It was a misty evening yesterday for sure! Doesn't matter, as long as it stays "warm."

Punk texted me again today. He seems to be feeling more comfortable to contact me. I think he was shy to do it much until now, afraid he was bothering me. He is coming over on Thursday. :)
 
I had such a lovely date with Punk on Thursday. I've just been treasuring the memories...

He brought over hard copies of his STD labs and as he told me, he was negative for everything. So we made the decision to become fluid bonded. He really hates condoms and can hardly fuck with one on. This wasn't much of a problem for me since everything else we do is so fulfilling. But it sure was great to be able to do the PIV. Damn. Being condom-free sure frees one up sexually.

We had 3 sex sessions on our date, as well as again, cooking together and listening to music and just talking each others' ears off. He played a Stephen Sondheim musical for me from his MP3 player. It was nice to have him share something he loves with me.

I was so full of NRE, that the next morning I felt I missed him already. I texted him a little that day but he didn't respond much for whatever reason. So I remembered he'd mentioned something on our date about an answer he had on okc to one of the questions and how it surprised me. I hadn't read all his okc Q&As for some reason! Usually I read all of those for a new person I liked.

So since he wasn't chatting, I read them, and was very entertained by hearing his "voice" in his explanations to many of his answers.

Yesterday we chatted twice and at length, talking about okc Q&As. We discussed which questions were more important to agree on. He said his main deal breaker was, Do you have an ex you would still like to get together with. Saying if someone said yes, it would be baggage he didn't want to deal with. We had a few moments of confusion when he thought I'd answered yes to that one. I started to explain I did NOT want to revisit any old relationships. But he thought otherwise at first, and got all upset at himself for thinking I *did* want to get together with an ex, and that he might have "alienated" me.

Anyway, this conversation was very exciting to me, because it showed he cares about me enough to not want to hurt or alienate me. His confusion and sincerity were so cute!

On our date, I'd invited him to our Yule party which is Monday (tomorrow). He got enthused thinking about what dish he wanted to bring. Yesterday I asked him to get to my place 2 hours before the other guests are expected, so we can shag and still have time to get food ready and the altar set up. Him: "OK, 5 it is!"
 
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Dan Savage says, 'Fuck first!'. Made me laugh you two are following that 'rule'. 😃

I'm glad you've been so happy lately.
 
I didn't know that was a Savage rule! lol

It sure is great to have something working out finally. I know what I'll be wishing for, or asking the gods to manifest for me tomorrow night during our Solstice ritual. More of this, please! It's nice of Punk to have agreed to come, since he is an atheist. But of course, being the information sponge he is, he was curious to see what we do.

The guy KC named Mr Maine hasn't been emailing me much. I am surprised since he told me he didn't text, and he requested emailing. I am so unused to using email for communicating with people, I felt I was doing him a favor to agree to that method. Yet, he's hardly using it. Oh well, he doesn't want to get together til mid-January. We'll see how that goes. I'm not too invested.

miss pixi and I just got back from a fun little cookie swap/game afternoon at some friends.' I made peanut butter Hershey kiss cookies, she made sunflower brittle. We came home with about 7 different kinds of goodies, and had a blast playing several cute and interesting games. We brought Takenoko, and we also played Munchkin Zombies and Dixit.
 
Cool about the fluid bonding :) (I admit to being envious, though, since that's something I can't do with Woody.)

Ugh about Mr. Maine. Having someone who doesn't text is not easy. It would be nice if he would keep in touch with you, though.
 
Cool about the fluid bonding :) (I admit to being envious, though, since that's something I can't do with Woody.)

Well, maybe someday. I'm fluid bonded with 2 people and I am sure many other poly people are too. Plus, you see and have sex with Woody way more often than Highlight does... Just sayin.'

Ugh about Mr. Maine. Having someone who doesn't text is not easy. It would be nice if he would keep in touch with you, though.

I did send him a few paragraph email yesterday, and he responded, but then said, "See you in mid January." Um. It's only Dec 21, does he not want to talk now for 3 weeks? Whatever, dude!
 
I know, but Woody was very clear that he and Highlight had agreed that if they take that step, he will only fluid bond with her. (Which doesn't strike me as entirely fair, since she'll be fluid bonded with both him and Lips, but it isn't my decision or, really, my business why they made that agreement. I just need to know that's what they agreed.) On the other hand, he also said that if for some reason things don't work out between him and Highlight, he'll remember that I want to fluid bond with him and it will happen.

Basically he said the only reason he's fluid bonding with Highlight instead of me right now is that she asked first; if I'd asked first, he would have done it with me. And he said he was surprised I hadn't already asked before she did, for exactly the reason you say, that I see him more often.

Another ugh about Mr. Maine!
 
Merry Christmas Eve to those that celebrate.

It's been a busy week. In amongst Xmas prep, I got to see Punk twice this week.

Sadly, his mom has lung cancer. She had him very young and is only 57, a lifetime heavy smoker. He was visiting his parents on Sunday night. They live closeby his apartment. She's been on chemo a few months and one of the drugs almost killed her once already. But she pulled through. Sunday night she wasn't breathing well and looked really bad. Monday morning his dad brought her to the hospital, where a CATscan revealed she has pneumonia, a possible side effect of her latest drug. :rolleyes:

So Punk almost didn't come to my place for Solstice, since he felt he should be with her. But an aunt told him to go and take a break. So he did, but he admitted to feeling guilty. His love for his mom is touching. We went ahead with our evening. We tried sex, but while he pleasured me nicely, his heart wasn't in it for himself, so we stopped fooling around and cuddled for a while.

After we got dressed we came out and had our ritual with miss pixi, including a meditation on planting seeds of hopes, dreams, projects for the year. We start it in the dark with just one candle representing the element of fire. After the meditation, we light multiple candles, a fire, the tree, and I cued up music (Gaudete and Here Comes the Sun). Part of my focus was on sending healing light to his mom.

Once we got the fire going well (including a log we'd saved from last year's Solstice, like proper pagans) we feasted beside it. I gave Punk cookies we'd baked and those we brought home from the swap, to nibble on while miss p and I put finishing touches on dinner. He enjoyed the BBQed chicken, my homemade cranberry sauce, and he brought a nice veggie side dish, Jamaican cabbage, he'd made as well. :)

By the time we finished dinner it was 11 and he headed home. The sun came up in the morning, so our ritual worked. You're welcome.;)

Punk's parents had planned to host Xmas Eve dinner, not cooking themselves, all the relatives were bringing the food. However his mom had planned to bake cookies, and had already bought the stuff. So that day, Tuesday, Punk baked 3 different kinds of Italian cookies with his bff. And he cleaned his parents' house, did laundry, floors, straightened up. What a guy.

Yesterday (Wed) he spent time with his mom in the morning. She is coughing a lot, has to stay in the hospital for observation, but isn't in danger, she's sitting up in bed now and then, talking, ... however, Punk's aunt was being very doom and gloom because her sister can't come home for Xmas, and acting like this was The End. It was bringing Punk down and annoying him. So I invited him to come over before he and his aunt made meatballs, to cheer him up. He did. :) It was a nice 2 hour visit. We chatted with miss pixi, looked at funny youtubes, and Punk was in good spirits. We cuddled on the couch, no sex. He brought me a nice bag of some of his home baked cookies too! So sweet of him. When he had to go he thanked us and said it was just the break he needed. He told me to let him know when I am available again (which I told him will be Dec 26). Maybe he will be ready for proper sex again then, if his mom continues to improve.

miss pix and I had a nice evening. We split a bottle of champagne with a simple dinner, to celebrate her completing a big life goal this week. And we had sex. :) Watched South Park Mr Hanky marathon too. lol

My son is coming today, to spend just one night. On the day after Xmas he is driving down to NC with his dad and his dad's gf to visit her family. So today I need to wrap presents, and make Xmas Eve dinner. It will be easy: a pot roast in the crockpot with parsnips, green bean casserole, potatoes. Wine. Cookies and miss pixi's homemade sunflower seed brittle for dessert. Tomorrow we are doing our traditional thing. After presents will go out to the movies. I scored tickets for a Star Wars matinee. We will bring my son and meet a friend there who wants to join us. Then we will just go out for Chinese food, after which my son will return to his home, our friend will head out to visit other friends, and miss p and I will have the evening to ourselves.
 
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Happy Merry :)

Positive thoughts to Punk and his family. What a hard thing to have to deal with.

I need to find out more about Solstice and other celebrations... Something I've been interested in for over a decade, but attempts to actually learn anything have always led me to the more commercialized "you must say these words in this order with these items and send me money" type of thing. (I'm way too oppositional to go in for anything that requires rote memorization and doing what I'm told, hence my not belonging to any organized religions.)
 
Thanks for your well wishes, KC. I feel so bad for Punk.

For my rituals I use the book Spiral Dance. I also used a manual for teaching children about Wicca, Circle Round, when my kids were young. I just dip into them for ideas, then choose what appeals to me most. For Yule, we set up an "altar" to sit around, holding items meant to represent the 4 elements and 4 directions. Air is incense, fire is a candle, a shell with salt water in it is water, an amethyst crystal is earth. I invoke gods and goddesses important to me, silently, and we have a reading for each of the 4 directions. Then I generally read a poem or two for whatever holiday it is, and we have a silent meditation on Yule, since winter is a time for quiet and rest and germination of ideas. The Yule tree isn't lit til we light our candles and the fire, while quiet music plays. We also pass an alabaster cup of wine and sometimes a bowl of cannabis (depending on who is attending lol).

You have to feast to reground yourself after the ritual. I find it all very calming and strengthening.

I've been to outdoor celebrations too, because my ex's band used to play at a local large pagan Solstice. Also fun. Cold but fun.
 
Awww, I got a text from Punk, his mom is well enough to come home after all! It's a Christmas miracle!
 
Thanks, KC! It really brightened my day to hear she was home. Punk was so relieved.

So, Christmas Day. I got miss p and my son up at 10 (early for them since they always stay up very late playing video games when he visits), and we opened presents, which were awesome. I made a nice breakfast of bacon and eggs with cheese and onions and tomatoes, and bagels fried in the bacon grease (what?), then we got showered and dressed and went to meet our friend for Star Wars!

When I got to the theater I saw Punk had texted me, "Merry Christmas and stuff." So I wrote back and told him I'd just settled into my comfy recliner at the theater. He responded, Cool, have a nice nap! It was a little joke we had, since he always falls asleep when he tries to watch a movie. But I didn't fall asleep, the movie was quite entertaining.

Then on to the nearby Chinese/Japanese restaurant for sushi and other foods and mai tais. I like our Xmas Day tradition, because I am usually fed up with Xmas and all the red and green and ho ho ho by the time presents are opened.

My son decided he really didn't want to travel to NC, so we are hosting him for a couple extra days. Not sure what to do if Punk wants to come over. I will try and sexile son and miss p for a couple hours, send them out to walk the dogs (our dog and a dog I am sitting for), or to go play pool or something!
 
I've been familiar with the term sexile for... years, I guess? It's pretty common with young single people who have apartment-mates.

I did invite Punk over for dinner tonight, or rather, he said, Maybe I should come over, and I said, yes. Despite my son still being here. Punk likes my son and vice versa. So... dunno if there will be sexiling or we will just behave ourselves. Son is leaving tomorrow. I am not sure if Punk is feeling randy anyway, since, though his mom came home from the hospital, she is not doing great. He's been staying at his parents' for a few days since his dad works nights, so he's being useful. His anxiety about her may be damping down his libido still. We will see!

I'm horny though. Hmph. I told Punk today this is one of the times I wish he could host me. But there must be something about his living situation at his apartment with his roommate that makes it impossible. He hasn't told me what exactly, that is. Today when I asked about it when we were texting, he said, Sorry, it's really a problem. I will have to find out what the issue is.

No other poly news other than the usual idiots messaging me on OKC. One guy sent me a first message today saying, "I'm interested." Sheesh, I sure am NOT interested if that was all he could come up with to entice me!
 
My last visit with Punk went great. I am having no problems in my love life lately! I hope that doesn't make my blog boring. Sometimes things work out! Goodness knows I worked hard enough dating to finally find someone who fits into and enriches my life.

Punk got here right on time (for once, heh) at 6:30 Sunday night. miss pixi had chili cooking in the crockpot but it needed some more time. My son and miss p and I had played a couple hands of Frog Juice and had moved on to Sorry. We had just started the game, so Punk took the 4th corner. He hadn't played before, but caught right on and even won the game. Then we played a round of Takenoko and I won. It was fun.

By that time the chili was done, so we ate. That is, I had a sandwich and some coleslaw I'd made. I had encouraged miss p to make chili for my son and her while he was here, since I am allergic to all peppers. Glad Punk wanted some too.

At one point, Punk and I had gone to the kitchen to get drinks and I had asked him how his Xmas Eve and Day had gone with his mom and all the relatives. He said it was a great party. His mom was resting, but many relatives went in one at a time to talk to her. However, after it was all over, she had no memory of the parties. She is also diabetic and her blood sugar is raised by the cancer chemo. And that is making her lose her cognitive function. She is falling apart.

Punk said, "She is dying." First time he used those words with me. Then I asked him why he can't host me at his place. He admitted he let his room in his apartment go a year ago when his mom first started to get really sick, to move back in with his parents to care for her. His dad works overnights and so Punk is needed to make sure his mom is cared for at night. He told me he is embarrassed to be living at his parents,' but of course I assured him that in a case like this, it is perfectly understandable. And noble.

But he was still in good spirits since his one goal had been to have her get home from the hospital in time for Christmas. Even though she couldn't remember it after all.

Then he made an allusion to us getting busy sexually after dinner. So I knew sex was still on! Yay!

After dinner I told miss p that Punk and I were going to wander off to the bedroom. She took my son downstairs to play video games and turned the volume up high. hehe He and I had our usual mind-blowing kinky sex. Damn, it's so good. And I always feel so relaxed and calmed afterwards. He is so enthusiastic, giving, and endearing.

After we were done we got up and hung out for a while alone talking, then miss p and my son came upstairs and we visited together some more. Son showed Punk his guitar, which is an awesome acoustic. He handed it to Punk, who strummed a few chords. It was nice to see and hear Punk with a guitar in his hands... since I know he was in a band for a decade. Hot. I'm such a groupie. He left at 11. Now I know why he is always watching the clock at the end of our dates, needing to get home to be available for his mom's care. I am glad he trusted me enough to tell me.

Yesterday the dog I sat for a week got picked up. My son left in the afternoon, and miss p and I went for pedis (also a mani for her), which is always a special treat. Then we had a nice quiet night alone with no extra dogs or guests. Ahhh... leftovers for dinner and some funny shows on TV. We also had sex, making me a very happy camper indeed.
 
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