Stop The Vinsanity...

vinsanity0 said:
After doing some research I'm not so sure. I suspect she has borderline personality disorder. She may actually believe the things she's saying are true. I wish I could help her with this.
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BPD is a tragic condition, to say the least. Why do you suspect she suffers from it?
 
River said:
BPD is a tragic condition, to say the least. Why do you suspect she suffers from it?
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Mostly because she exhibits all the symptoms. Of course, I am not a psychiatrist.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder

The bottom line is she suffers from something. I don't believe it can be "fixed" without lots of therapy. Of course it would do no good to suggest this because she would just take it as me being vindictive.
 
vinsanity0 said:
Mostly because she exhibits all the symptoms. Of course, I am not a psychiatrist.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder

The bottom line is she suffers from something. I don't believe it can be "fixed" without lots of therapy. Of course it would do no good to suggest this because she would just take it as me being vindictive.
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All of the symptoms. Okay, then, she probably does have that condition.

I suspect I have had a relatively mild case of it myself, years ago, and that I still suffer from a small degree or extent of the pattern. I would certainly not want to have a severe case of it! It's a very unpleasant thing. I'm not sure I would ever have been diagnosed with BPD, per se. But that I had some of the symptoms at some degree. It likely had to do with my experiences of childhood neglect and abuse and the psychological oddities of my parents.
 
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She's basically had a shit life. Starting with being gang raped at a young age, looking up to a sister who was a sociopath, a verbally abusive father, two abusive husbands, etc. She has yet to resolve any of this.

I wasn't aware of all of this the whole time I've known her. She put up a pretty good front. I was aware of her last long term relationship and I knew that guy was an asshole. Since I didn't really know, it wasn't my intention to White Knight her. I did think I could give her a pretty good life though.
 
I'm sorry, Vince. I know it's hard to realise someone you care for is probably affected by BPD. It was after reading something here that resonated that I looked into it and realised that my ex from last year was also exhibiting well over half the symptoms. It made me realise I never actually stood a chance in that relationship. It's truly heartbreaking when you can see the amazing parts of that person, but then there's this dysfunction in the way of an adult relationship.

Kia kaha
Evie
 
Time to catch up.

The holidays were okay. My Mom happened to be back in town for Christmas. I spent Christmas Eve over at her ex's house. He is Italian and did the 7 fishes thing.

I didn't go anywhere for NYE. Just couldn't get into it

Nothing too exciting there...lol.

I am back on the road now. I binge watched The Handmaid's Tale over the last few days. What an amazing show. Very well done. The final scene of the 2nd season had me yelling at the screen though.

I think I failed to mention that Elle passed away in October. She was very young.

Still haven't heard from Mary. By now she is probably busy with her new grandchild. I hope everything turned out alright. Her daughter was having a difficult pregnancy.

My daughter called me the other day to tell me she is moving to Tampa to be with a guy. That puts her a little closer to me. Can't wait to see her.

Dating is currently non-existent.
 
Gee Vin, I'm sorry to hear about Elle.

I hope that having your daughter more in visiting distance will be a pleasent way to fill some of your introvert socializing time.

I've been meaning to ask if you have read the recent book The Long Haul: A Trucker's Tales of Life On The Road. A fun read. It reminded me of you.

Leetah
 
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I'm sorry to hear about Elle's passing! Are you grieving?

And Bella, first the HIV revelation, and now your realization that she might have BPD as well.

I'm sorry for what you must be going through.

hugs
 
Magdlyn said:
I'm sorry to hear about Elle's passing! Are you grieving?

And Bella, first the HIV revelation, and now your realization that she might have BPD as well.

I'm sorry for what you must be going through.

hugs
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Grieving seems to have become a way of life for me over the past nearly three years. The good news is I seem to be able to deal with it pretty good. I understand it and let it happen
 
I am back home for a week. Currently concentrating on working on the house. I kind of let that go during the Bella Debacle.

Speaking of which, Bella cut out all communication with me. It's baffling to me. I don't want to pursue anything, but I would like to get some stuff back that I left at her place. I guess I should just write that stuff off?

Anyways, I removed all the wallpaper border from the back room. Today I'm going to work on patching the walls and fixing minor imperfections. I should be ready to start priming tomorrow or the next day.
 
I put up my OKC ad and got two likes in the first two days. The first was from a 61% match, but she had only answered a few questions. So I figured I'd write and say hello (and other stuff, not just hello) since she saw something that interested her. Haven't heard anything back.

The second was 80-something% but a little out of my age range. That one ended up disappearing from my likes.

I don't really expect much as far as getting contacted. It's always been pretty rare.

As for prospects, they are slim in my immediate area. I opened it up to 50 miles and got some more possibilities. So far I have been using non-monogamous as part of the search. That is split into two searches, single and not single. It seems the attached women are mostly looking for one nighters. Not too many actual poly. I am interested in one in particular. She is in an open marriage, submissive, and open to FWB, though she is also fond of one nighters. I'm not usually a one and done guy, but I figure I'll contact her when I get closer to home.

I'm back on the road now, but solo. No more Trumpanzee for the moment. His wife had to have a minor surgery, so he is staying home to help with the kids. He was really getting on my nerves, so I am happy for the break.
 
Not only did I not get a reply, but the conversation is completely gone...lol.

I forgot to remove Bella from my FB. She posted something like, " It's amazing how good I am at reading people. I'll keep trusting in the Almighty Jesus Christ."

"You can't read shit", I thought as I unfriended her. Apparently the anger I wasn't letting myself feel came bubbling up anyway.
 
I had the conversation disappear entirely too. It's really discouraging. I think it happens when someone unlikes your profile. But I'm not sure about this.

Why is Bella wound up about you being on OKC? Not that it matters.

Good luck with the profile. I've found OKC to be mostly meh with bursts of worthwhileness.
 
The OKC thing has nothing to do with Bella. She's just a game player into high drama. I doubt she's even on OKC.

I have some pretty good prospects, but that doesn't mean much. Definitely no guarantees lol. I did have good luck in Seattle last time I tried it.
 
The Bella Debacle sounds like it was really painful for you. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

Probably you would not have been compatible with someone who's so into Jesus anyway...I have also noticed that some people who turn very strongly to born-again type faiths are trying to fill a void which, in other more mentally stable people, would be filled with a sense of self.

Best of luck with OKC!
 
It's been awhile...

I've been home since Easter. I didn't find anyone on OKC to contact, which ended up being a good thing. I did have a tentative play date with someone I met elsewhere, but I ended up having to cancel.

About a week after I got home I had a heart attack. I went to the er and they didn't want me to leave. Actually, they said if I left I would probably die. Yikes.

I ended up having a quadruple bypass. I spent almost two weeks in the hospital. I've been out a little over a week. I'm staying at my Mom's because I'm not supposed to drive for six weeks. Of course I'm slowly going insane. I feel good but I can't really do much of anything yet. I am totally not used to not being in control of my life.

On a positive note, I am down to smoking four cigarettes a day. I used to smoke two and a half packs a day.

Ironically, I removed most of the non-smokers from my OKC. Not sure if I can get them back.
 
Oh no! I'm so glad you're okay.
 
I'm glad you're still with us, Vince.
 
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