This is my blog. Feel free to share your thoughts if you feel like it.
First of all, I want to name the main characters in my story. Some of them were already introduced in my introductory post, but with different names.
Storm and I have been living together for 20 years, for the most parts anyway. We currently live in our own house in the countryside. Every now and then we have half-seriously talked about having a “city flat”, a place where we could spend some time away from the small town where we currently live. I think we both have also desired some alone time, especially during times when things haven’t been so great between us. I know I have. We both have had our individual struggles in life, regarding e.g. depression. Of course, with kids and pets and all, city flat hasn’t really been a practical thing to pursue (not to mention financially!). Sometimes we have also talked about relocating completely, but as our kids are still in primary school, we have felt that living here is the best option for them. When we bought this house maybe 15 years ago, it was a joint decision. I didn’t really care where I lived, as long as I got to be with Storm, and she preferred the countryside back then, which was fine by me. Besides the house, we have all sorts of other ties here as well.
Along came Sublunar. He’s been seeing Storm for a few years now. Things were progressing quite naturally between them, and we had already started to talk about how we can arrange our lives and living arrangements, so that everybody's needs would be met, when “things” happened. You can read more about that from the introduction post. We have since moved on, the best we can, with Sublunar still in our lives. Anyhow, as a result of everything, it looks like Sublunar is going to (have to) move away from his current house, away from River. No big surprise there. However, that in a sense puts us back where we initially were (or where we thought we were. Uh... so complicated). Figuring out living arrangements that is.
So right now, Sublunar and Storm have been looking for apartments from the city. A place they could live together. Financially this is feasible. Storm is planning to spend her time between our house and the city flat with Sublunar (it would be only some 30 km away). Ghost and Nettle would primarily be here with me (and Storm when she’s here), but are of course welcome to the city flat (as am I). Pitch Shifters and Fluffy would also stay in the country house. Or that’s the plan anyway. So.. enormous things are happening in our lives. Scary things. Exciting things.
I have been talking with Storm that this is not really the dream I had in my mind, not regarding the living arrangements and not regarding poly life. But I reckon we need a change. We are not looking to break up (or are we?), but something else. However, I’m really scared how this will affect my relationship with Storm. Then again, I’m kind of excited to get more time to myself and maybe the time I have with Storm will be more appreciated by both of us too. Maybe this could also energize me to finally open up to meet new people. So far I have felt that I just don’t have the will and energy. It’s not something that I really need to make happen, but it’s rather something that could be...
I’m really bummed that I don’t get to live in the city at all. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I feel envy. I feel stuck here. Lazy bastard that I am, I really loathe the chores that come with the house. Yes, it has been stated that I can stay in the city flat sometimes too, but in reality I don’t think that would ever happen, I wouldn’t feel comfortable there (on my own, or with Storm), and I’m pretty sure Sublunar wouldn’t be comfortable either, as it will be primarily his home. Something to talk about, but I’m really pessimistic about it. I have been dreaming about kitchen table poly, and I know that it would be something Storm would also like (in the long run), but at the moment we are going in parallel, and I’m not seeing that changing any time soon. It’s probably for the best too, for now.
Then there is also a whole lot of other distressing matters in the background, the relationship between Sublunar and River, their likely divorce etc, but I feel I have enough on my own plate right now. That is his life and his mess to figure out. Of course it will most likely reflect on our lives too, and can ultimately change everything, but I can only focus on short-term right now. Then there is the issue of trusting Sublunar in the first place, after all that happened… Then there’s Ghost and Nettle, but I’m pretty confident they will be ok with these changes that we have planned now. They are up to speed and are looking forward to the possibility of spending some time in the city as well, especially Ghost. Then there’s sex, but that will need it’s own post sometime in the future...
I’m pretty sure nobody expected we would head into this direction after reading my introduction, including me, but here we are nonetheless. I often feel like we are the example of “how to not do things”, not just regarding poly but on almost everything. Still we have somehow managed and most importantly, I’m not regretting the choices we have made, so far anyway.
First of all, I want to name the main characters in my story. Some of them were already introduced in my introductory post, but with different names.
- Storm - my partner
- Ghost - our teenage son
- Nettle - our pre-teen daughter
- Pitch Shifters - Our 2 doggies
- Fluffy the Cat
- Sublunar - Storm’s boyfriend
- River - Sublunar’s wife
Storm and I have been living together for 20 years, for the most parts anyway. We currently live in our own house in the countryside. Every now and then we have half-seriously talked about having a “city flat”, a place where we could spend some time away from the small town where we currently live. I think we both have also desired some alone time, especially during times when things haven’t been so great between us. I know I have. We both have had our individual struggles in life, regarding e.g. depression. Of course, with kids and pets and all, city flat hasn’t really been a practical thing to pursue (not to mention financially!). Sometimes we have also talked about relocating completely, but as our kids are still in primary school, we have felt that living here is the best option for them. When we bought this house maybe 15 years ago, it was a joint decision. I didn’t really care where I lived, as long as I got to be with Storm, and she preferred the countryside back then, which was fine by me. Besides the house, we have all sorts of other ties here as well.
Along came Sublunar. He’s been seeing Storm for a few years now. Things were progressing quite naturally between them, and we had already started to talk about how we can arrange our lives and living arrangements, so that everybody's needs would be met, when “things” happened. You can read more about that from the introduction post. We have since moved on, the best we can, with Sublunar still in our lives. Anyhow, as a result of everything, it looks like Sublunar is going to (have to) move away from his current house, away from River. No big surprise there. However, that in a sense puts us back where we initially were (or where we thought we were. Uh... so complicated). Figuring out living arrangements that is.
So right now, Sublunar and Storm have been looking for apartments from the city. A place they could live together. Financially this is feasible. Storm is planning to spend her time between our house and the city flat with Sublunar (it would be only some 30 km away). Ghost and Nettle would primarily be here with me (and Storm when she’s here), but are of course welcome to the city flat (as am I). Pitch Shifters and Fluffy would also stay in the country house. Or that’s the plan anyway. So.. enormous things are happening in our lives. Scary things. Exciting things.
I have been talking with Storm that this is not really the dream I had in my mind, not regarding the living arrangements and not regarding poly life. But I reckon we need a change. We are not looking to break up (or are we?), but something else. However, I’m really scared how this will affect my relationship with Storm. Then again, I’m kind of excited to get more time to myself and maybe the time I have with Storm will be more appreciated by both of us too. Maybe this could also energize me to finally open up to meet new people. So far I have felt that I just don’t have the will and energy. It’s not something that I really need to make happen, but it’s rather something that could be...
I’m really bummed that I don’t get to live in the city at all. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I feel envy. I feel stuck here. Lazy bastard that I am, I really loathe the chores that come with the house. Yes, it has been stated that I can stay in the city flat sometimes too, but in reality I don’t think that would ever happen, I wouldn’t feel comfortable there (on my own, or with Storm), and I’m pretty sure Sublunar wouldn’t be comfortable either, as it will be primarily his home. Something to talk about, but I’m really pessimistic about it. I have been dreaming about kitchen table poly, and I know that it would be something Storm would also like (in the long run), but at the moment we are going in parallel, and I’m not seeing that changing any time soon. It’s probably for the best too, for now.
Then there is also a whole lot of other distressing matters in the background, the relationship between Sublunar and River, their likely divorce etc, but I feel I have enough on my own plate right now. That is his life and his mess to figure out. Of course it will most likely reflect on our lives too, and can ultimately change everything, but I can only focus on short-term right now. Then there is the issue of trusting Sublunar in the first place, after all that happened… Then there’s Ghost and Nettle, but I’m pretty confident they will be ok with these changes that we have planned now. They are up to speed and are looking forward to the possibility of spending some time in the city as well, especially Ghost. Then there’s sex, but that will need it’s own post sometime in the future...
I’m pretty sure nobody expected we would head into this direction after reading my introduction, including me, but here we are nonetheless. I often feel like we are the example of “how to not do things”, not just regarding poly but on almost everything. Still we have somehow managed and most importantly, I’m not regretting the choices we have made, so far anyway.