I apologize if this gets long winded. There is a bit of a back story I need to explain before asking my questions. Last night I explained to Bud that I felt like the week had been very overwhelming and I was missing our quiet time at night when it was just him & I for a while. We never did anything too exciting but it was our alone time to sit, talk, reconnect, after I've worked all day and he's been with kids all day. I looked forward to those times at the end of each day. We usually had about 1-1.5 hours of that time before Sweet Lady came over.
This week has been horrible for Sweet Lady. I swear her horoscope should have said "Don't even bother, just go back to bed" every day this week. So she's been over here a lot more than usual. She has slept here every night. Her kids are all older teens so she says good night to them then comes next door to our place. The kids know they can come over if they need something. It's not unusual to find our kids at her place and her kids at our place on any given day. They go back and forth between both homes on a regular basis.
Anyhow, Bud is the one who puts our 3 yr old to bed. He's Daddy's little shadow and will not fall asleep without him in the room. Once he's asleep Bud tucks him into his bed and comes back downstairs. Last night he fell asleep instead of coming back down to be with me. I woke him up, asked him if he still wanted to come downstairs. He did but we didn't get our quiet time.
Then Sweet Lady came over. Her and I sat outside talking for about 20 minutes while I gave her a back rub. We came inside for a while then went to bed. We talked, cuddled and did what 3 adults in bed might be found doing on any given night.
Bud kept trying to include me in the after snuggles. I gently declined, said Sweet Lady needs you tonight, gave them both kisses, said "I love you" to both and I will snuggle with you after she leaves for work. She has to be up at 4am, me 7:15am.
Fast forward to 4:39am when I wake up to use the bathroom and realized the alarm had not woken any of the 3 of us. Sweet Lady rushes out the door to avoid being late. Bud looks at my phone to see why the alarm didn't wake us only to realize I had turned it on for 4am but had not changed the day it was supposed to go off from Thurs to Friday. So my mistake made her late. I felt horrible.
Bud remembered I had requested one on one snuggle time with him after Sweet Lady left for work. Well when we snuggle it always leads to other things. In the midst of that he tells me to do something that's not necessarily a hard limit for me but I was having a difficult time with it. Which I expressed. His response was to point out it wasn't a hard limit, and he had told me to do it knowing I wouldn't like it as a punishment for making Sweet Lady late. I went from zero to 60 on the anger scale in a matter of milliseconds.
Yes, I screwed up in regards to Sweet Lady. I apologized for it more than once. But dang it punishing me for it during what was supposed to be our time felt REALLY bad. I came downstairs feeling angry and hurt. Am I wrong in feeling this way? Did I over react?
This week has been horrible for Sweet Lady. I swear her horoscope should have said "Don't even bother, just go back to bed" every day this week. So she's been over here a lot more than usual. She has slept here every night. Her kids are all older teens so she says good night to them then comes next door to our place. The kids know they can come over if they need something. It's not unusual to find our kids at her place and her kids at our place on any given day. They go back and forth between both homes on a regular basis.
Anyhow, Bud is the one who puts our 3 yr old to bed. He's Daddy's little shadow and will not fall asleep without him in the room. Once he's asleep Bud tucks him into his bed and comes back downstairs. Last night he fell asleep instead of coming back down to be with me. I woke him up, asked him if he still wanted to come downstairs. He did but we didn't get our quiet time.
Then Sweet Lady came over. Her and I sat outside talking for about 20 minutes while I gave her a back rub. We came inside for a while then went to bed. We talked, cuddled and did what 3 adults in bed might be found doing on any given night.
Bud kept trying to include me in the after snuggles. I gently declined, said Sweet Lady needs you tonight, gave them both kisses, said "I love you" to both and I will snuggle with you after she leaves for work. She has to be up at 4am, me 7:15am. Fast forward to 4:39am when I wake up to use the bathroom and realized the alarm had not woken any of the 3 of us. Sweet Lady rushes out the door to avoid being late. Bud looks at my phone to see why the alarm didn't wake us only to realize I had turned it on for 4am but had not changed the day it was supposed to go off from Thurs to Friday. So my mistake made her late.
I felt horrible. Bud remembered I had requested one on one snuggle time with him after Sweet Lady left for work. Well when we snuggle it always leads to other things. In the midst of that he tells me to do something that's not necessarily a hard limit for me but I was having a difficult time with it. Which I expressed. His response was to point out it wasn't a hard limit, and he had told me to do it knowing I wouldn't like it as a punishment for making Sweet Lady late. I went from zero to 60 on the anger scale in a matter of milliseconds.
Yes, I screwed up in regards to Sweet Lady. I apologized for it more than once. But dang it punishing me for it during what was supposed to be our time felt REALLY bad. I came downstairs feeling angry and hurt. Am I wrong in feeling this way? Did I over react?
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