I spent almost 3 hrs in Borders weeding through those books for you, you better like them.
I have gift receipts if they aren't what you are interested in.
I think the thing with self help books, is that you have to take them for what they are. Advice. The book is not going to solve your problems. It will however give you insight on how others solved similar problems. It's like asking for adivce, but choosing when you get it. and sometimes, you get answers and insight to things you never thought to ask.
Yeah, some are kind of corny and some are just there to make money, but others are truly written from the heart to help others help themselves.
I'd just like to point out that the book we are writing, would be classified as self help.
It's saying, "Hey I've been there. Here's what I did, I hope it helps."
You asked earlier today how to read them, and I wasn't sure how to answer you. So I did some thinking and here's my opinion on it.
I usualy take these types of books and skin through them. To get a feel of how they are set up. I check the table of contents and pick a random chapter that sounds interesting. I get a feel for the writers tone.
If it is written in the way you are I writing ours, in almost a conversation. I read it in order from front to back. Because I feel like picking and choosing in that style of writing, loses some of the impact and point the author was going for. They build each chapter on the previous ones. If you skip a few chapters you may miss a few building blocks that would really help in understanding the next chapter.
If it is written in more of a clinical or text book style. Then I pick and choose. You may still miss some things, but I have found I get bored and miss the whole point if I try to read it in order.
With any style, I keep my journal close. I write my thoughts done as I read. Because if I wait until I am done, I've lost half of what I wanted to get down. I jot down my thoughts, sometimes including the passage in the book that got my brain going in the first place. Sometimes I have no thoughts on things, but I find points that I want to keep record of, so I jot them down too.
I've read a bit of both books I bought for you and picked them for a reason. They specificaly mention the types of thought patterns your have expressed the desire to change. They specificaly go through how to break those thought patterns and replace them with positives.
I am so proud of you for working through this.I know it seems like an endless battle right now, but it does get easier. Once you not only have the tools, but know how to use them, it'll be much easier to process things.
Would it help if we worked together in the way we did some of the religious work? I don't mind doing it that way if it will help you. I can read through the books and set up questions and 'assignments'. Give you topics to journal. If you don't want to that is totaly fine, just throwing the offer out there. I want to help you in anyway I can. I can't really find the words to tell you how proud I am of you for even starting this, but I also have no words for the pain it causes me to see your pain.
I think something that will really help you is learning what is running away and what is accepting that there is nothing you can do right now. I want you to really think about what we talked about this morning. Putting something on the shelf, so you don't dwell over it while gaining the knowledge you need to fix it, is not running away. There's just nothing you can do about it right now, aside from gain more knowledge. Remember what you always ask me when my worrying gets out of control, is dwelling on it going to solve anything?
My final thoughts are to remind you of the inscription I put in the journal I gave you. Remember that you can be honest with me about anything, that's what this whole communication thing is about. What this whole new way of working together is about. I will do whatever you need me to, to help you. It is a painful path, and sometimes what you find when you kick over those rocks is going to be really ugly, please remember that I am here. That I have no record book, no score to keep track of. Unconditional love my dear.
Oh one more final thought-Robot Chicken did a special for star wars episode 3. And one of the skits was a spoof on the Dos Equi's ads. Apparently Bobba Fett is also the most interesting man in the world.
