BDSM discussion

Magdlyn said:
We didnt use it on a very strong intensity yet.
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Interestingly enough, when I got laser treatment for smoking two years ago, a friend of mine went in right after me. The laser has an adjustable current and I pushed it pretty far. My friend went in after me and was hit with the same level, and he couldn't believe it! I might have a bit of tolerance for shock.

You can create quite a loop with that TENS if it's cranked.
 
Mono has a large pain threshold, but I wasn't going to tell him that, Magdlyn. ;) He gets such a big head.

I am looking for a bull whip and a large paddle and will have to start working out more to give him everything I have soon. For someone who has just gotten into kink he is certainly a quick learner. I haul ass on him with a cat o' nine tails and he can take it. I'm working on longer though, before stronger. Some rhythm is the goal.

My last playmate, who is on hold at the moment, is into enema play, water play, nose hook to ass hook (does that have a name?), hanging his girlfriend up by the vagina by a hook, and various other things masochistic. I'm not so much into all that, so I'm glad he has that in his life.
 
Thank you very much, LoveBird. That is an excellent idea and one I wholly intend to try! :D
 
Power exchange and BDSM books

She did mention that the authors are kind of "One True Wayers." So, just take their info w a grain of salt if it doesn't resonate with your personal experiences or desires.
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I am really open to hearing about books that any of you love or would feel to be helpful to beginners. Though not a BDSM book (more about ass-sex) I like The Surrender by Toni Bentley.
 
I'm fascinated with BDSM, but I think more as a voyeur than a participant. I like to play occasionally, more into sensation play and psychological. I tend to get scared and run away when things get too intense.

I really hate the way so many people equate "sub" with "masochist." I was recently dating this one woman who says she's a Domme, and I was going through a submissive phase. I tried making it clear that I didn't like pain, and she just belittled me with "Sure, sure, whatever you say" *wink wink* I was like, no really. You hit me with that thing, I'll punch you back. Very frustrating. Needless to say, that relationship didn't even bud, let alone blossom.

I really love hanging out with kinky people; they're just so much more interesting than "normal folk." So because of that, I always assumed I was "into" BDSM. But the more I self-investigate, the more I realize that I'm much more interested in observing and being around it than actually participating.

I do, however, love to be tied up and teased. So I guess I'm not completely innocent. ;)
 
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I do, however, love to be tied up and teased. So I guess I'm not completely innocent.
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Being tied up and teased...hmmm! I love that. I think everyone has their yes, no, maybe list. Just cause you don't like pain doesn't mean you aren't subby.
 
Today is apparently my day for learning about 24/7 master/slave or dominant/submissive relationships. What an interesting world we live in.

I don't even know enough to ask questions, so I'm having to grasp information as if floats past me.
 
@Lemondrop... What's going on that you get a day for that? Can I come?? :cool:
 
Well, really, all I did was exist. Sometimes information comes to me at unexpected times! Weirdly, sooner or later the information is needed. So I must be having some interesting things coming my way.

It's not as interesting as it seems! The subject just came up on an e-mail list I'm on, and then it seemed like every few hours today something else came up in relation to it. No fun and adventure for me, just learning!
 
I've recently started a new relationship w a top/dom guy. He's 27. It's a bit funny to be topped by a... kid. LOL

We're going to have our third date this week. It's a play partner sort of thing; I don't expect love here. He's VERY handsome, well endowed, and has a nice confident air when he tops (just sort of makeout sessions so far), but he has this wrinkle. When we first started talking on OKC he said he wanted me to top him. We had one date and then he got cold feet for a few months and recently got back in contact. So the deal is I am letting him top me for a while, let some trust build, before I get medieval on his ass.

I feel delicious fear going into the next date. Things are gonna heat up. We discussed hard limits yesterday.
 
LR and I had been moving along well in our exploration of our D/s relationship untill we found out that she was going to have surgery. At first I thought we would have to put things on hold, but I was so wrong. Her surgery gave me a chance to show her my complete commitment to guard, protect, care for and love her, not only as her Hubby but also as her Dom. It has solidified her choice to "give herself over to me completely."

I'm looking forward to moving LR to the far edge of her fantasies. With this trust in each other that we are building things will heat up very quickly for us. Of course, the more hardcore stuff will have to wait till she is healed up.

I'm getting into jewelry making. Clit jewelry is all I've actually made so far, but I have drawings for a collar and also a leash that I plan on making for LR.

I was wondering if anyone had any great web sites for jewelry-type BDSM items. Most of what I find out there is leather. I'm not completely against leather, but it has to be very nice. I'm a bit more into gold and sterling silver. So, if there is a cool site that you like, post it up for me so I can at least get some more ideas for items that I can make. Thanks everyone.

Peace and love,
Maca
 
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Lemondrop said:
Today is apparently my day for learning about 24/7 master/slave or dominant/submissive relationships. I don't even know enough to ask questions, so I'm having to grasp information as if floats past me.
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Well, if you have questions, you know how to reach me. :) I've been researching and putting the details together for ours. :) Some of those little details will float into the blog too, as I get more secure in what on earth I'm doing/saying on there!
 
maca said:
.Clit jewelry is all I've made so far'but I have drawings for a collar and also a leash that I plan on making for LR.

I was wondering if anyone had any great web sites for jewelry type BDSM items. Most of what I find out there is leather. Im not completely against leather but it has to be very nice. Im a bit more into gold and sterling silver. But if there is a cool site that you like post it up for me so I can at least get some more ideas for items that I can make...
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This is a perfect demonstration of how my life is weirdly circular. Maca, we just bought Asha a beautiful leather collar off of Etsy. They have a wonderful variety of just about everything you can make, and I've been thoroughly impressed that I could find so many weird things. I'd say it's worth browsing.

Also, you've made clit jewelry? Do you mean for piercings?

And last of all, Asha is a jewelry maker, though she rarely gets time for it lately. I don't think she's tried her hand at anything large, mostly rings and necklaces. She also makes lovely chain mail jewelry, with which I sometimes help. :) You want to learn chain mail, I'll be glad to talk to you about it.

ETA: Yay! LR is going to answer some of my questions! Off to the PM!
 
Hey Maca, remind me to send you a picture of the slave's collar that someone I know just had made. It's gorgeous! I keep forgetting.

Lemondrop, I don't have as much time as LR, but please feel to ask me anything too. I don't seem to do D/s as you all do, but there is the same root of it. Anyway, just offering.
 
Well, you may regret making that offer, as I almost always have questions...none that I can think of right this second, though, as Easy has fallen asleep next to me and I want to ambush him! ;) Be back later...
 
This.

So, Jenny is into BDSM in a big way, as a switch. I can only domme to the most pitifully self-abusing subs. I love being a sub. Then there's Alex... who just doesn't get it.

He knows that these kinks are big for Jenny and me. We indulge his kinks, and he wants to do the same for us, but he doesn't push either of our "dom" buttons. I don't know what it is, but for some reason he just doesn't command respect and reverence the way my previous Masters have done. He thinks he just needs practice, but I can't really even tell him what to do. We tried some soft domination the last time we had sex, but my heart wasn't really in it. I don't know what it was, but there was some sort of an "it" factor that was missing. I don't know if it can be taught.

Truthfully, I could see myself subbing to Jenny once our relationship becomes sexual. I KNOW Alex will whinge on about that ("Why can she domme you and I can't?") because he wants to be included in everything.

Does anyone with a bigger dominant streak have anything I can share with Alex, just to see if I *can* teach him?
 
Lemondrop said:
This is a perfect demonstration of how my life is weirdly circular. Maca, we just bought Asha a beautiful leather collar off of Etsy. They have a wonderful variety of just about everything you can make, and I've been thoroughly impressed that I could find so many weird things. I'd say it's worth browsing...

Also, you've made clit jewelry? Do you mean for piercings?

And last of all, Asha is a jewelry maker, though she rarely gets time for it lately. I don't think she's tried her hand at anything large, mostly rings and necklaces. She also makes lovely chain mail jewelry, with which I sometimes help. :) You want to learn chain mail, I'll be glad to talk to you about it.

ETA: Yay! LR is going to answer some of my questions! Off to the PM!
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They are non-piercing. I can't do pierced and he's making 'em for me. :)
 
Can't help on the teaching someone to dom thing. I can verbally dom anyone. But once we're talking about ANYTHING sexual, it's GONE. Just GONE. That D part of my personality flees like it's being chased by Ringwraiths!

Maca is sitting behind me. He says his only piece of advice is that the only way a Dom can be an effective Dom is to COMPLETELY understand what the sub wants/needs and then be confident in their ability to do/provide whatever that is.

I guess I can add, having had people who've THOUGHT they would try to Dom me, that it also requires that the Dom believes in themself as a person. If they are just "faking it," they will come off as cocky or arrogant, and for many subs (never say all) that will fall WAY WAY FLAT.
 
I think it's fine to start as a sub, play that way, and learn and understand what a sub likes. Then when you Dom, you know what to do...

The guy I mentioned above flaked out on me. Just another douche masquerading as a Dom. Dom-ass...
 
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