Biblical Christian Poly Living

Hi,

Even though your ad is somewhat Christian-centered, I would still recommend also posting it on the Dating & Friendships subforum. You never know if someone over there might be interested in the same kinds of things you're looking for.

Good luck,
Kevin T.
 
Revenwyn said:
I was just wondering if you would limit "biblical polyamory" to being one man and multiple women, or if it is acceptable for it to be one woman and two men, for instance? I know that we only see the example of one man and multiple women in the Bible, but is that the only form that would be acceptable?
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I have been reading through the thread today, and this stood out. From the original written text, there is no forbiddance of multiple husbands or wives.
 
C.O.E. and Polyamory

Hi all,

New to the forum, so apologies if I get things wrong.

All of us are Christians. Two of us have recently rejoined the local church and really felt a part of the community there. We were supposed to be getting confirmed yesterday. But after reading the study literature, we decided that we needed to come clean about being in a polyamorous relationship.

Oh, how the atmosphere changed!

The thing is, the polyamory has only recently happened. (I am sure some will believe, others will never!) Our friend (the second lady in the relationship) was having a bad time. She was a good friend, but that's all.

Suzanna and I went to an evangelists' meeting. I have had bad health since an operation two years ago. We both did not pray for my health, but for help for our friend. The VERY NEXT day, I started to feel better, and ALL THREE of us knew what we needed to do! It was as if a light had been put on. Now, as far as we were concerned, God answered our prayers, and if he had come into the room and hit us over the head, it could not have been clearer!

But the church does not see it like that. We are now "misguided," yet "still welcome." :rolleyes: But their body language says, "No way!!"

So, we have not been confirmed, something we were really looking forward to. We take vows very seriously, indeed. In fact, that's the problem. We couldn't just keep our mouths shut. Very sad indeed.

Of course, the vicar does not accept that we had an answer from God. We must be mistaken!

We believe in God, and will not waver in that, but the church, we feel, has left us.

Alan

P.S. I asked about a soldier (who is someone who might have killed, and WILL kill on orders) getting confirmed. They willingly know they will disobey a commandment (NOT judging soldiers here), but they can still get confirmed by the church.

We love too many people and can't be insane!!!
 
Christ’s commands us to love one another.

He said He didn’t come to bring peace, but He came to separate traditional human relationships to become relationships that put Him in control.

When I research a topic I always start with what Jesus said. His teaching about His living as an unmarried person is limited to this statement.
“For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others--and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."
  • A eunuch cannot reproduce.
  • But could a eunuch be sexual?
  • Paul’s commentary on the issue expounds to include a discussion about immorality.
  • Immorality is an illegal (sexual) act.
  • Is it legal for a married man or woman to date an unmarried man or woman who chooses not to reproduce?
  • What are the legal limits for a married person touching an unmarried person?
  • Two eunuchs don’t have genitals and can’t reproduce.
  • Is it immoral for two eunuchs to sleep together?
  • Can they touch the other sexual organ, the brain?
  • Can they have intellectual intercourse?
  • Can they kiss?
  • Can they caress?
  • Was it immoral for a legally employed eunuch to use a dildo to stimulate a member of a harem to orgasm?
  • What does it mean to “live like a eunuch”?
  • Does living like a eunuch mean complete sexual abstinence?
  • I wonder how many castrated males or priests have pondered these questions.
My conclusion, as always, is to obey Christ’s command to love our neighbors as ourselves.
  • If my neighbor doesn’t want me to look, talk, touch, or live in peace with them, I’m to leave them alone and treat them like a pagan.
It appears to me that your vicar is your pagan.

I leave vicars, et.al., alone, so we both can live in peace.
 
"God handed down truth, and the devil said, 'Let me organize it.'"
 
Pagan

A pagan is someone who rejects your love even if you healed them of their sickness, fed them when they were hungry, and died to protect them from religious bigots who claim to be doing god's work when they harm or kill innocent people.
 
What is the fate and status of an atheist such as myself? Do I reject Jesus' love by not believing?
 
Fate

I can't answer that question.

We're talking about Jesus' heaven, not mine. You'd have to ask Him.

I have a good friend who is LDS. I've asked him if I can visit him on his planet and he said yes.

If I get a planet, you're welcome.

I have the feeling that if you actually saw a place where the rule was to love and be loved perfectly, you'd fit right in.
 
Re:
"I have the feeling that if you actually saw a place where the rule was to love and be loved perfectly you'd fit right in."
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:) Thanks loveboston, that sounds like a good sign to me.
 
loveboston said:
A pagan is someone who rejects your love even if you healed them of their sickness, fed them when they were hungry, and died to protect them from religious bigots who claim to be doing god's work when they harm or kill innocent people.
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Where on earth do you get that definition of pagan?

I do not believe the word pagan was in the Bible. It is a Latin word meaning country person. Pagans could be, and were, quite religious. Roman Catholic Christians eventually converted "pagans" to Christianity by force, and by publishing "pro-pagan-da."

I think it was many Jews who were depicted in the stories in the gospels to have rejected Jesus, not people practicing the state religion of Rome at the time (i.e., worshiping Zeus and the other Olympic pantheon). Romans could, and some did, worship Christ as one member of the pantheon.
 
Pagan

I gave you my paraphrase of what I think Jesus was referring to when He used the word pagan.

A wolf in sheep's clothing is what I think of. A really mean person who pretends to be nice.

Matthew 10:13If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector

When I think of a tax collector I don't think of a country person having fun in nature.

We should look up the Greek to see what the word pagan meant when Jesus used it.
 
Actually that one verse on which you base your understanding of "what a pagan is," to a Greek-speaking Jew of the 1st century, is Matthew 18:17, not 10:13.

It's easy to look up various translations of Biblical verses on Bible Gateway online.

http://biblehub.com/matthew/18-17.htm

Various translations use terms such as Gentile, unbeliever, one of the nations, or "an heathen man" (lol KJV). The Greek word would have been most accurately been translated as Gentile, which, in Hebrew, is goy, meaning, merely, a non-Jew. So, in this case, Jesus is made to say, settle a dispute with a troublesome Jewish "Christian brother" (one who sins) by speaking to him privately, and if that doesn't work, by taking it to the religious community (gathering, i,e., ecclesia, which we rather loosely interpret as "church"). If that doesn't work, "Jesus" recommends cutting this troublesome person out of the ecclesia, considering them no longer a part of the fledgling "Christian" community.

A pagan/Gentile/non-Jew did not then, and does not now, mean "really mean person" "who rejects your love even if you healed them of their sickness, fed them when they were hungry, and died to protect them from religious bigots who claim to be doing god's work when they harm or kill innocent people."

Also, a Roman "pagan" would not be someone "having fun out in nature." Country people were, and often still are, hard-working farmers and animal breeders, not vacationers.

And sure, we all hate paying taxes, but a tax collector is not a Gentile by definition. Gentiles and tax collectors are just examples of someone you'd want to avoid.

loveboston, you sure do have a unique take on Biblical interpretation.
 
We Are Poly and Christian.

My husband and me, my oldest boyfriend and his wife, and my most recent boyfriend and his wife have attended the same church for years. My boyfriend's wives have never had a problem with their husbands and me being lovers. And my husband has never had a problem with me having other lovers. We are very open and honest with each other.

Before I learned about polyamory, I only dated one guy at a time. It was my husband who introduced me to polyamory. I liked the idea. I had been in love with my best friend for many years, but because he was married, I knew he was off limits. I struggled for years being in love with a married man, but I knew he meant a lot to me. I was in love with him.

One night, when we were at my best friend's and his wife's house, my husband brought up polyamory. My boyfriend's wife stated that she had heard of something like polyamory and felt that it seemed like a very loving lifestyle. My husband horrified both me and my best friend by asking my best friend's wife if she would ever be willing to share her husband with another woman. To our surprise, she said, "If that woman were someone like Debbie, whom I love and trust, yes, I would."

My boyfriend's wife added, "You two have known each other for years. I have trusted you two to be alone. I've often thought that there might be more to your friendship than you've let on, and I've never had a problem with that." We talked more on the subject of polyamory and my relationships with my best friend. We admitted that we both had deep feelings for each other and that we had never done anything with each other, romantically or physically.

My boyfriend's wife said that she had seen the way we looked at each other and how our hugs were more than just friendly. She also said she knew it was only a matter of time before we had a discussion like we were having, and she felt that it was about time we did. My boyfriend's wife gave us her full blessing to date and even be lovers. It didn't take long for us to be intimate, but it was a while before my boyfriend and I felt comfortable kissing each other in front of my boyfriend's wife. I have considered my boyfriend my second husband for the last seven years now.

Several months ago, another married man, who attends our church, approached my husband. He mentioned to my husband that he noticed that my boyfriend and I were very close, possibly closer than just friends. When my husband asked this other man what he was implying, he stated that he and his wife were talking about opening their marriage and he was hoping that he hadn't misread our relationship.

That afternoon, my husband and I, my boyfriend and his wife, and this other man and his wife went out to lunch together. We talked about this other couple's desire to open their relationship, and whether any of this was reflected or talked about in the Bible. We talked for some time, then both the other man and his wife stated their true reason for bringing up their desire to open their relationship. The other man told us that he had been attracted to me for some time, and his wife had been attracted to my boyfriend for even longer.

My husband and I, my boyfriend and his wife spoke in detail of what we understood polyamory to be and what it meant to us. The other couple told us that there was an initial physical attraction, but they had hoped there would be more. I ended up going out with the other man, and my boyfriend went out with the other man's wife.

Since that day we have been one big extended family. We still attend the same church together. I have my husband and two boyfriends. My second boyfriend's wife has a husband and a boyfriend. My boyfriend and I have loving legal spouses. And we have had some younger couples come to us and talk to us about how we have, in some way, figured some things out.

My husband has recently started dating a younger woman, who also attends our church, whose husband has been talking with my husband for some time. This guy's interest was in cuckolding. His wife admitted that both of them had saved themselves for marriage. Having been married for a year, both of had them realized that the wife's sex drive was much higher than her husband's.

The guy told my husband that he was very attracted to his wife, but the sexual desire just wasn't there. We told them that poly was more than sex. It is about romance, trust, honesty, friendship and love. My husband's relationship with this couple was originally along the lines of cuckolding, then it became more. My husband has found that he actually had deep feelings for this woman. Although my husband's relationship with this couple is still kind of a cuckolding relationship with the husband, the love that the woman and my husband feel for each other is evident.

When we attend church together, we all sit on the same pew. Facing us, from the right to left, you see my oldest boyfriend's wife, my husband's girlfriend, my husband, my oldest boyfriend's new girlfriend, my oldest boyfriend, me, my newest boyfriend and my husband's girlfriend's husband. Just last Sunday, our pastor approached all of us and told us that we were living examples of what Christ taught. When we asked what he meant, our pastor told us that we seemed to be the go-to people for the younger and even some older congregants. He said that we don't see color or age or gender or culture, but instead express love in how we live. He even said that it was evident that we put Christ first in all that we did. And we all agreed.

We are still not sure what our pastor meant when he said, "It's obvious that you all have a special love and bond with each other. You have something other people may not understand or accept, but God's love is evident in each of you." We liked what our pastor had to say, but we are not sure what he really knows about us.

To us, polyamory is about loving. And that is what Christianity is supposed to be about, as well. Why anyone would see the two not being connected is a mystery to us.
 
Because to many, many self-styled Christians (more than would admit this), Christianity is supposed to be about tradition (first and foremost).

I am glad you guys are finding yourselves in a loving, unjudgmental place of worship. What church is it if I may ask? Is it Unitarian Universalist? I know there are some other open-minded branches of Christianity as well.
 
Ah, yes, that does sound right. Well I'd say you've found a keeper. I really like the pastor so far.
 
Why do we exist then?

Magdlyn said:
Actually I have done away with belief, faith and hope in my life. I find them useless concepts.
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I am very new to polyamory, and consider myself a Christian so it is very encouraging to see that at least some Christians are accepting of polyamory.

As I read through this thread, this quote by Magdlyn stood out to me. This seems strange to me. Maybe it is because I am a Christian I find it hard to wrap my head around. You have done away with belief, faith, and hope. This makes me pose the question: Then what does it mean to be human? Why do we exist?

It is something I have been pondering for a while now, and this thread has brought it to the forefront. If we have no faith (in anything, because, IMHO, even atheists have some form of faith), no belief in something and no hope at all, then why should I care about myself, or anyone else or the world, or life at all? What would be the point?

Why are faith, belief, and hope useless concepts?
 
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