I can relate to that, because my husband is the worrying type too. He needs me to check in with him when I go somewhere alone (it doesn't help that I'm pretty bad at driving). It was particularly hard for him when I went back to my home country by myself, so I can imagine it's harder for your primary when you're in different countries. However, if that's the case, it's not really a poly-specific thing, and what you did wasn't cheating. Do you also need to notify him when you go out for non-dating reasons, like hanging out with friends? Can you try something more realistic, like checking in once or twice a day?After kind of resolving everything, I can say that the issue was not necessarily that I had sex with Blue, but more that Red didn't know I was going to be with him in the first place. He wanted me to tell him where I was going and what my plans were going to be. And I know that the reason for that is because he tends to be a very worrying person. He's lost a lot of people close to him recently. So when he didn't hear from me like he normally does, he feared that the worst had happened when it came to me as well, and something had happened to me the night before. A bit overdramatic, but I can understand the whole worry thing. Doesn't necessarily mean he's justified in accusing me of cheating in my opinion, though.