InfinitePossibility
New member
I tend to deal with jealousy by reminding myself that I am living a life I chose to live and that I enjoy living. So when I feel twinges of jealousy sometimes, to see my sister surrounded by her children and live-in partner, while I live alone and am childless, I remind myself that the feelings are fleeting, that I love my life, and that I'd be deeply depressed to be living the way my sister does, however much it may seem like fun for moments. Then I turn my attention to things I like about my life.
If I feel jealous because somebody close to me is becoming close to somebody else, I remind myself that nobody else is my property, that everybody in my life is free to do as they choose, just as I am free to do as I choose. I might be sad if things drifted so much we were no longer close, but I remind myself that I'd rather go through the pain of loss than try to hold onto somebody who no longer wants to be there.
I always think that's a weird way of dealing with jealousy, the idea that to feel okay, you have to feel as if you are better than most people, and therefore, don't need to fear them. It seems limiting to me.
I find great value in spending time with people who are better than I am at things I want to be good at, or who have qualities I would love to have. I find that being around people who can do things that I aspire to be able to do, or who do the things important to me better than I do, is a good way of becoming better at those things myself.
Few things make me happier than to see somebody whom I have been mentoring getting better at whatever I'm teaching them. If they can get better at whatever it is than I am, I feel a deep joy at having been part of their learning process. Plus, I feel a selfish happiness that there is somebody else in the world who I can turn to for help when I need it.
The notion of dealing with jealousy by feeling better than others just doesn't fit at all in my world view.
If I feel jealous because somebody close to me is becoming close to somebody else, I remind myself that nobody else is my property, that everybody in my life is free to do as they choose, just as I am free to do as I choose. I might be sad if things drifted so much we were no longer close, but I remind myself that I'd rather go through the pain of loss than try to hold onto somebody who no longer wants to be there.
There are few that have the qualities I have, and whether completely true or not, as long as I believe that, I worry about no man and hence, suffer no jealousy.
I always think that's a weird way of dealing with jealousy, the idea that to feel okay, you have to feel as if you are better than most people, and therefore, don't need to fear them. It seems limiting to me.
I find great value in spending time with people who are better than I am at things I want to be good at, or who have qualities I would love to have. I find that being around people who can do things that I aspire to be able to do, or who do the things important to me better than I do, is a good way of becoming better at those things myself.
Few things make me happier than to see somebody whom I have been mentoring getting better at whatever I'm teaching them. If they can get better at whatever it is than I am, I feel a deep joy at having been part of their learning process. Plus, I feel a selfish happiness that there is somebody else in the world who I can turn to for help when I need it.
The notion of dealing with jealousy by feeling better than others just doesn't fit at all in my world view.