Poly Vignettes: Sharing Success & Happiness

Midnight

New member
My ex is a wonderful woman and my daughter is amazingly talented and individual. They both are thriving and seam quite happy where they are now in life. I would like to share more of my life with them but that is not the case currently....who knows what the future brings though....This is a success and happiness thread after all!!!!:)

I'm now wondering why I even asked - was I trying to pick holes in your happy life - just cos I'm struggling and want eveyone else to be struggling too?? xx
 

MonoVCPHG

New member
No worries Midnight...us Monos are a funny bunch and you are in a different situation than me. I feel for you. Take care and keep your face to the sun where the warmth is :)
 

LovingRadiance

Active member
You guys are inspiring. I hope you keep posting, becuase days like today-I really need a happy inspiring real story. Some days are tough.
Nothing major in our lives going WRONG-just feels like nothing is going right either but you give me hope.
 

Midnight

New member
No worries Midnight...us Monos are a funny bunch and you are in a different situation than me. I feel for you. Take care and keep your face to the sun where the warmth is :)

You are very kind....

You know what - people tell me I hide my light.... I should maybe let you know that life is not always as bad as I paint it... (though sometimes it feels that way)

My husband of nearly 30 years is totally in love with me. He is kinda in love with this other woman, but she's definitely secondary. He does seem to love me better since he fell for her ( a couple of years ago). We probably will meet as a threesome to discover whether there's any prospect of making something work between us 3, but my husband is now saying that if she's not up for it (respecting the primacy of his marriage and our family) then it will have to end....

I am beginning to learn something about my jealousy also. I don't doubt he loves me. I seem to be envious of something he has, that i don't. This seems to go back to me being a twin. I was always kinda jealous of her - thought she was prettier than me (we were identical twins!!) I was the clingy one - she the one who was lookin out more....

So - if i could possibly overcome my possessiveness and turn outwards myself - who knows what might be out there waiting for me....

love to you all
xx
 

MonoVCPHG

New member
Not a big post....I'm just happy and in Love, rejuvenated, connected and ready to build an even better life with my Lilo and chosen family :)
 

redpepper

New member
My mum invited Mono to my brother's girlfriends birthday lunch party! Okay, she is probably doing it begrudgingly, and grumbling under breath, and will ignore him and be super fake.... but I am happy that at least she is backing down and including us. :D
 

aussielover

New member
OH YAY! I hope it's not too aqward and she behaves herself. Maybe the therapist got her thinking a little. I hope she's really turning around.
 

vandalin

New member
I wish you guys luck. I'm sure your mum would not want to ruin a perfectly good party and probably would not have invited Mono if there were too many people against the relationship and would have a problem with him being there. :)
 

redpepper

New member
My mum dropped my boy off at the door tonight after taking him out. The first I've seen of her. She looked sheepish, and uncertain. I was compelled to hug her, so I did. I told her I was glad to see her and smiled. She hugged me back and let out a long sigh. I'm not sure what it meant but I think it was good :) The ice is breaking on her anti poly heart perhaps?

Mono stopped by on the way home from a long ride and visit with his friends. He stopped for a mear 2 minutes. Long enough for me to wrap my arms around him, tell him I love him and give him a kiss straight from my heart to his. I can't bear not to see him once a day. Those two minutes were all I needed to connect and feel him on my skin as I smoothed his face. All I needed to feel whole for another day.

I love him so dearly. No one can take that away from me and I won't change it for anything in the world. He is my home and my family.
 
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MonoVCPHG

New member
I can't bear not to see him once a day. Those two minutes were all I needed to connect and feel him on my skin as I smoothed his face.

I love him so dearly. No one can take that away from me and I won't change is for anything in the world. He is my home and my family.

Speechless...you really do love me like that...I'm honored and blessed. Thanks Lilo.
 

XYZ123

New member
Sounds like mom is breaking down, slowly. Just trust that she loves you and your family more than she dislikes the idea of you being poly. And it sounds like you're able to disconnect from the pain and anger and still love her and treat her as your mom. Very inspiring. Keep it up. You're an amazing woman and if anyone can make this work out, it's you.
 

maca

New member
Well I had posted somewhere(cant remember).That I had planned to go out with LR's other love this week and have a talk about the relationship between the two of us.We talked for a few hours, had a drink and then came home. I felt better getting my feelings and thoughts out in the open with him.Im still fighting some insecurites and fears but I not reacting to my issues anymore. LR and I have gotten much better at talking things through.I think in time C and I will become very close.


The 3 of us are planning to go out tonite and have some fun.Sis inlaw is watching the kids:)
 

MonoVCPHG

New member
Last night I made an awesome discovery!! A lot of stuff has been piling up lately and, as per the norm, Redpepper and me did lots of self-analysis and checked in seriously with each other. We gave each other the freedom and choice to take different paths and change the nature of our loves expression. We have done this several times and once again we chose to love each other the way we are meant to.

My connection and energy were both withdrawn though and we both knew it...physically I can't hide it...nothing "happens" shall we say :eek: I'm completely non-sexual when not intimately connected to someone. (I would make the worst porn star!)

Because I hate being withdrawn and I know it hurts her as well I tried something different. I showed her where I feel my energy and connection resides inside me and asked her to help me let it out. I placed her hand there and as she spoke to me about what she felt and how much this means to her we were able to open it up, free my connection and let her into me.

She knows when I am not accepting her love and when I am not connected and withdrawn. Now I feel as though we have a way of consciously working together when that happens...that for me is another success!!
 

MonoVCPHG

New member
I showed her where I feel my energy and connection resides inside me and asked her to help me let it out. I placed her hand there and as she spoke to me about what she felt and how much this means to her we were able to open it up, free my connection and let her into me.


And no..this was not my crotch....you polies and your dirty minds :rolleyes:
 
My connection and energy were both withdrawn though and we both knew it...physically I can't hide it...nothing "happens" shall we say I'm completely non-sexual when not intimately connected to someone. (I would make the worst porn star!)

Interesting to hear someone else put it so bluntly. I have the exact same "problem" - but it's selective. Very strange. I seldom have a problem with it for a striaght-up one night stand or strictly sexual encounter - but when I have a new interest that is developing, sex can be... Challenging, lol. I can be aroused as all hell and - nothing happening. Or will start out great, and "he" loses interest 1/2 way through independently of the rest of me! Grr. Happy to perform other ways so it's rarely a problem, but it drives me crazy! Likewise, when i'm with my love, if there are problems or I don't feel that she's "into it", I can't perform - but when all is well, well - no problems, lol. This only developed after my marriage crashed and burned about 5 years ago. Weird.

Anyway - glad to hear you two have found yet another way to connect. Better and better... :)
 
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MonoVCPHG

New member
Very strange. I seldom have a problem with it for a striaght-up one night stand or strictly sexual encounter

I'm not that surprised..I think most guys are quite capable of that. I certainly thought I would be...turns out nope! When I think back to even my early teens I was like this...I just didn't realize what was happening.

It took me 37 years, a 17 year marraige, an affair, a melt down of biblical proportions, counselling, a polyamorous relationship and tonnes of self analysis to figure out a simple concept.....no connection = nothing to "connect" with :eek:
 
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