The "How Are You Doing" Thread (redux)

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I really need to STFU when I've been drinking. Tonight, after my third vodka, I told this guy that I see very, very occasionally (as in once or twice a year), "Let's have a relationship. Do you want a relationship?" Jeez, what's wrong with me?

He said yes, which complicates things a bit. <grumble>
 
Ray's ticket is bought and he will be arriving in a couple of weeks to begin the next chapter of our lives. I am very happy but not without some trepidation

Leetah
 
nycindie said:
I really need to STFU when I've been drinking. Tonight, after my third vodka, I told this guy that I see very, very occasionally (as in once or twice a year), "Let's have a relationship. Do you want a relationship?" Jeez, what's wrong with me?

He said yes, which complicates things a bit. <grumble>
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Yea, I'm done with those. I can't do that anymore unless the guy is pretty darn special.
 
I'm doing much better today. My energy levels aren't where they need to be but that's because of some of the recent issues I'm trying to work through.

Meanwhile I'm realizing how incredible my relationship with Dean is. His loyalty to me astonishes me more and more. Then today, as Zed and Pixie went out, Dean came by, stormed in my house, grabbed me by face, and nearly knocked me over with kisses. Gosh.:eek:

Moments like that help me realize how wonderfully lucky I am to have a connection like that. Cuba doesn't deserve to know me intimately like that, Dean does.
 
nycindie said:
I really need to STFU when I've been drinking. Tonight, after my third vodka, I told this guy that I see very, very occasionally (as in once or twice a year), "Let's have a relationship. Do you want a relationship?" Jeez, what's wrong with me?

He said yes, which complicates things a bit. <grumble>
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Brilliant! Why not? See how it goes.
 
Now that things are finally done with Cuba, I feel a strange sense of relief, mixed with grief. Of course it's less painful and more easy to let go of because of the circumstances, but there's still that empty sick feeling when I realize again that my time to hold him is up.

Trying to just get through the day so I can spend the evening with Dean and go to the gym. Cheers to a recharge day.
 
Just a little drive by to say "Hi", and that we are still around and still doing about the same!

My daughter is moving to within a couple of hour's drive of Mal and Djinn's house next week, and I'm driving her out there (18 hour drive from here! Ugh!) and then Mal is meeting me and after spending my BDay together we are going up to his house to hang out with the family until I head back home for Christmas. There are direct flights from both Mal's city and Billie's city, so I can fly into one and out of the other and see them both on every trip! Much better than the alternative she was looking at which would have had them on opposite coasts!

Djinn and Mal are still struggling. I'm growing to think that Djinn is monoromantic, even if she is very polysexual... she is steadily disengaging from her relationship with Mal and talks about Aladdin being her true love. And it isn't that I haven't seen similar relationships last (one of my friend's mom's is 20 years older than her dad, and they are an interracial couple on top of that. 40 years ago that just "wasn't done"! But they raised 8 kids together and are still happily married.), but Aladdin has stated that he is not "in love with" Djinn, is mono, and plans on marrying someone his own age and having kids. It is pretty rough to watch, and I think she is going to get really hurt. But I can't do anything to stop it. My not being involved is not going to make her and Mal's relationship magically fix itself. Sadly. Because that would be a sacrifice I'd make, but ... it just wouldn't fix anything :(
 
Glad you're hanging in there, A2poly! I'm sure it's tough to see Mal and Djinn struggling...

Things are bumping along with me. Roger and I are in limbo about difficulties in our relationship, both acknowledging problems but unable to fix them. Not sure what will happen, but we've been up and down a lot over the last 6+ months. It's pretty exhausting...

I came out to my parents a few weeks ago, who didn't have the best response. A lot of concern about how I "wasn't thinking about the family." It could have gone a lot worse though. My perspective is that the ball's in their court now - they can have as much involvement in my life as they'd like, but it comes with acceptance of Jack as my partner. Seeing them for the first time tonight since coming out to them over email, so we'll see how that goes.

Jack and I are great. It's hard to have one relationship going so spectularly, with the other teetering. But he couldn't be more supportive of me, no matter what happens. We went to our first wedding together and had one of the best nights of my life! The long distance is killing me, but I know it will be over in several months. I can't wait much longer to see him every day!
 
On the poly front, I am having conversations on OKC with two guys who happened to contact me around the same time. I question my judgment for logging back into OKCupid recently (don't know why I did that!) but this time, they both are somewhat promising.

One definitely has a sense of humor, is into a wide range of interesting stuff, and lives outside the city but works near me. He's looking primarily for a casual thing. His pics aren't that great, so I'm not really sure if I find him attractive. He seems a little dorky, but could be very different in person. I dunno. I think it's possible I might enjoy having coffee and a conversation with him, at least.

The other one also has a sense of humor, seems intelligent, shares an interest with me, and is definitely attractive! He lives farther away than the other guy and comes to my city periodically for work and to visit family. I like a few things he's said about relationships and dig the vibe I get from him.

So, with both of them, I've been talking about meeting up after the holidays. As usual, I temper my enthusiasm and don't let myself get too excited at this stage -- plenty of fish in the sea, y'know. The conversations from now until then will help determine whether or not I actually will meet either one of them.

On the non-poly front, work sucks and I'm stressed out about that as well as personal stuff I've got to deal with. Sometimes, what I'd really like to do is disappear and start over somewhere in a completely different place, doing completely different things.

<sigh>
 
I have a cold :( I feel groggy and icky, and my throat hurts and I'm just hoping it's because of the cold and not strep again. (Might call my doctor later, haven't decided yet. It doesn't *feel* like strep, though.) And I'm overtired, because I don't sleep well generally, I sleep even worse when I have a cold, and I haven't caught up yet from two nights in a row of only 5 hours of sleep last weekend. To some people 5 hours is plenty; for me, because of the fibromyalgia, anything less than 7-8 hours at minimum leaves me only semi-functional.

I'm also whiny because Hubby's been doing his "I'm going to stay at the shop and game" thing the past couple of nights, and Woody's away, so I don't have anyone to snuggle :(
 
Thanks Reflections :) I definitely empathize with the one relationship going well, and one not problem. I don't know how to deal with it at all :(

It's hard again. Djinn and I had a falling out over a long held misconception on her part. I thought I'd been clear on the topic for years (since well before Mal and I started), but she was holding onto this belief anyway. Now of course she believes my feelings are because of my relationship with Mal, but they are really not. :(

She's also declared her intent to live in the basement (with Aladdin, I guess)...and Mal is super upset about it.

So shitty Christmas all around.
 
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Just wanted to take a moment to wish you all a very happy new year.:)
 
TFW when you communicate something difficult at the wrong time. And even though it's mostly fixed, it'll never quite be, and you're actually no better off about the original thing anyway, and now there's the fallout from the original thing, and you wish you'd kept your mouth shut in the first place.
 
Today I am doing okay but there never seems to be enough time in my day to accommodate both relaxing AND getting things done, LOL. So far, I've relaxed and just hung out quite a bit, got a few necessary phone calls made, and stuck to my eating plan (Day 2, yay!), but I've go to get cracking on some other stuff that I shouldn't procrastinate about any longer. Sigh...

Oh, and just want to say there are now three guys from OKC who I am communicating with. Two of them seem quite promising, one I am not so sure but haven't written him off yet. So, at least there's that.
 
A little frustrated and disappointed.
Had a "friend" of mine tell me the other day that she "choses men who need to be destroyed and rebuilt"

I can't even talk to her right now because I'm so frustrated. I don't think I want her as a friend anymore.
 
kdt26417 said:
That's kind of a scary friend ... :eek:
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Really sucks cause I'm keeping her bed at my house...

I hate having anxiety issues. My anger has been at an 11 over the whole thing. Kind of one of those "how are people so shitty?" Moments and I'm trying to trudge my way through the frustration.
 
I can see how that would be a frustrating situation.
 
My weekend was 50/50

The Bad
My 29yr old niece has decided to go to cooking school. Which I am glad about. But this means my soapmaking business which I have been running out of my mom's kitchen is now going to be displaced. That means all of my equipment & supplies are going to have to go somewhere . But since the basement isn't ready for me to work there. I have no clue what is going to happen.

The Good
My medievalist group I am a apart of had it's first Choir group meeting tonight. So great singing and comardary was had by all. And the light snowfall didn't dampen any spirits.
 
Weirdness. But good weirdness. I have been extremely stressed out at my job for the last several months, dealing with difficult issues that had me wondering if I would soon be unemployed. Things were not going well.

And then, a few days ago, the Manager at another of our locations suddenly quit. Walked out. And so I was offered a promotion to Manager at that location and a nice salary increase, which I immediately accepted! One plus for me is that it's close enough to my apartment for me to walk to work, which means no more commuting cost (to and from work five days a week at $2.75 each way for public transportation, or about $12 for a cab one way - which I took far too often). Not having that expense anymore is like a raise in itself! A major plus is that the hours are slightly less than I had to work before, but enough of a difference (and especially with no more commuting) that it gives me more time for my personal creative endeavors and restarting my business that's been on hiatus for a few years. The hours and commute at my old location just left me so tired all the time.

I started the new position this week. So, yeah. Went from thinking I'd be applying for Unemployment to managing my own location and getting a rather decent raise. Good weirdness.
 
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