Hi, my wife of 14 years and I recently decided to go to an open relationship. We set some initial boundaries and thought we then would adjust over time if need be as we go and figure out things.
One thing I do get a bit anxious when my wife is out, just from a safety perspective. I know it is silly and probably not that normal (and it is something i'm getting better at and working on) but I asked if she could let me know the address if she goes to a guys place in case something goes wrong and she needs me to get her or whatever, at least the first time with someone.
And the other is just to let me know roughly what time she would be home if she was going out with someone. One example was she said she was just going out for an hour or so, then said she might be a "little" later and when I woke up hours later she wasn't home and didn't have any message from her I got a bit worried and called her see if she was all good. Not just for a safety thing but also just to know whether to wait up for her so I can spend at least a little bit of time with her before bed.
I have never said no to anything she wants to do or demanded any time limitations. But when I asked if she could do those two things she refused and said it was really weird and is really controlling and that her friends she has spoken to say the same.
I was just hoping if I could get some advice on whether you think I am being unreasonable or out of line (or controlling)?
Thanks in advance
One thing I do get a bit anxious when my wife is out, just from a safety perspective. I know it is silly and probably not that normal (and it is something i'm getting better at and working on) but I asked if she could let me know the address if she goes to a guys place in case something goes wrong and she needs me to get her or whatever, at least the first time with someone.
And the other is just to let me know roughly what time she would be home if she was going out with someone. One example was she said she was just going out for an hour or so, then said she might be a "little" later and when I woke up hours later she wasn't home and didn't have any message from her I got a bit worried and called her see if she was all good. Not just for a safety thing but also just to know whether to wait up for her so I can spend at least a little bit of time with her before bed.
I have never said no to anything she wants to do or demanded any time limitations. But when I asked if she could do those two things she refused and said it was really weird and is really controlling and that her friends she has spoken to say the same.
I was just hoping if I could get some advice on whether you think I am being unreasonable or out of line (or controlling)?
Thanks in advance