Biblical Christian Poly Living

commiting adultery

I agree in that you show love to everyone, but how can you be putting God first when committing adultery? His word is very clear on MARRIED people not straying. What would your preacher say about that?
 
Why did this thread stop?

hi, I'm wondering why this thread stopped. I was ravenously reading the posts as I have struggled and continue to look into poly and Christianity and how they fit. I have a bad feeling it was because of judgmental comments. I hope we can keep the discussion goin. So many need to explore this.
 
Amen WP, we should get this thread going again.

Re: Oklahoma7Artist's last post here on adultery ... I know the Bible doesn't support this, but I personally believe it's okay to have a relationship outside the marriage as long as both spouses and the "third" person are consenting.
 
Devil's advocate

Okay, this should get the ball rolling. Christianity and poly will never mix well, for many reasons, one of which is that it is viewed as a form of idolatry. Men taking multiple wives was seen as okay, due to necessity, but polyamory is about loving more than one person out of choice, which generally takes focus from your relationship with God.
 
The Bible is somewhat obscure about polyamory -- as it is obscure about quite a few things. I do think that mixing poly with the majority of Christianity is a hard proposition, at least for the time being. First I think Christianity will have to accept SSM. The process has begun, but it won't be quick or easy.
 
DebbieandRay said:
One night when we were at my best friend and his wife's house, my husband brought up polyamory. My boyfriend's wife stated that she had heard of something like polyamory and felt that it seemed like a very loving lifestyle. My husband horrified both me and my best friend by asking my best friend's wife if she would ever be willing to share her husband with another woman. To our surprise, she said, "If that woman were someone like Debbie, who I love and trust . . . yes I would."

My boyfriend's wife added, "You two have known each other for years. I have trusted you two to be alone and often thought that there may be more to your friendship than you let on, and I have never had a problem with that." We talked more on the subject of polyamory and me and my best friend's relationship. We admitted that we both had deep feelings for each other and that we had never done anything with each other, romantically or physically.

My boyfriend's wife said that she had seen the way we looked at each other and how our hugs were more than just friendly. She also said she knew it was only a matter of time before we had a discussion like we were having, and she felt that it was about time we did. My boyfriend's wife gave us her full blessing to date and even be lovers. It didn't take long for us to be intimate, but it was a while before me and my boyfriend felt comfortable kissing each other in front of my boyfriend's wife. I have considered my boyfriend my second husband for the last seven years now.

To us Poly is about loving. And that is what Christianity is supposed to be about as well. Why anyone would see the two not being connected is a mystery to us.
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Beautiful.
 
Maybe sometimes Christians make things more complicated than they have to be? I say that as a former Christian myself.
 
While I'm an atheist, I'm so glad to read things like the quote that random1 just posted. It gives me hope, because I'm in the same boat that he's rowing.
 
The way DebbieandRay described it was nice... but keep in mind that when that poster was here, it became obvious they were posting erotic fantasy. That quote was perhaps painting a rosier picture of what opening a closed relationship is really like.
 
Oh, what a shame. I don't think it's impossible for such a thing to happen, but that did sound a bit too good to be true the way it was written. Thanks for clarifying, Magdlyn!
 
I come from a pretty strong Christian background. Being so new to poly and all these experiences, I'm not quite sure how to reconcile them with my faith, if they can be. For the most part, I feel like I'm abandoning that faith.

That probably has more to do with abandoning Church tradition and my family's wishes than my actual belief in Christ, Calvary, or what we're supposed to do with that. I never really expected to find myself in this situation where I wanted to be with more than one woman and have it be considered okay/ethical.

I still believe that Christ died for our sins, and that God meant this to redeem humanity. And I still pray for God to help me through these struggles. But I'm not sure what to think beyond that. I feel like whether I'm sticking with the rest of the Bible or not, my best bet is to remain ethical throughout this process, and not hurt those closest to me that I'm supposed to protect and love. I haven't been perfect at this, but I'm trying to correct my mistakes, move past them, and keep my head in the game.
 
If I still believed in a God, He/She/It/They would be a God Who created us with a brain so we could think and trust ourselves. We could draw our own conclusions from what's written in the Bible. Polyamory makes sense to me, so, I don't think God would hold it against me if I practice polyamory in my life.
 
I agree with that, Kevin. I feel like I do have a relationship with God and it's still intact, but this is one of those times when He's just sort of seeing what I do with this new experience and how I handle it. He's not really giving me any clues or any direction! He's letting me use my prior knowledge and experience to get through this and, yes, think for myself.
 
tronprogram said:
I agree with that, Kevin. I feel like I do have a relationship with God and it's still intact, but this is one of those times when He's just sort of seeing what I do with this new experience and how I handle it. He's not really giving me any clues or any direction! He's letting me use my prior knowledge and experience to get through this and, yes, think for myself.
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Your male god observes you, but does not guide you in any way. Is this Yahweh, of the strong right arm of the Bible? The one who'd smite a Hebrew for having sex with a Canaanite woman?

Or is Christianity so friable these days, people are just doing whatever they want, no matter what the "Bible says" anywhere in its pages, and calling themselves Christians still, somehow? Based on a fuzzy (superstitious) belief that somehow, someway, Yahweh exists, and Jesus was begotten, and spent a few years using charming parables to tell people how to interpret Yahweh's rules and wishes, while the Romans were trying to wipe them both out?
 
Magdlyn said:
Your male god observes you but does not guide you in any way. Is this Yahweh, of the strong right arm of the Bible? The one who'd smite a Hebrew for having sex with a Canaanite woman?

Or is Christianity so friable these days, people are just doing whatever they want, no matter what the "Bible says" anywhere in its pages, and calling themselves Christians still, somehow? Based on a fuzzy (superstitious) belief that somehow, someway, Yahweh exists, and Jesus was begotten, and spent a few years using charming parables to tell people how to interpret Yahweh's rules and wishes, while the Romans were trying to wipe them both out?
Click to expand...

Maybe you're not, but it sounds like you're wanting me to justify my faith to you? I don't think I need to do that.
 
Nope, you don't need to do anything. You don't need to post on this thread and neither do I. I happen to be highly Biblically literate and just want to point out that the God of the Bible is irrelevant to many, if not most "Christians" today. They are just making things up! "The Lord told me to do this or that."

For that matter, Yahweh of the Bible has also been irrelevant to most Jews since about the time of the sacking of Jerusalem, since the rabbis wrote the Talmud and reinterpreted their Bible for their time.

Christians are always cherry picking out a verse here or there, which contradicts another verse there or here, to say, this is what Yahweh wants, and what Jesus tells me I have to do to get into the heavenly kingdom.

If you tried to "live Biblically" for one month, it would drive you nuts. (Not you, tron, but anyone who professes to be Christian or Jew).
 
tronprogram said:
I come from a pretty strong Christian background. Being so new to poly and all these experiences, I'm not quite sure how to reconcile them with my faith--if they can be. For the most part, I feel like I'm abandoning that faith.
Click to expand...

No advice. Just wanted to say that I understand. It's been a process for me, as well, with a lot of grief, pain, and growth throughout. My 'crisis of faith' (if one wishes to call it that), started long before I found myself in a polyamorous relationship, but that poly relationship brought it to a head. Studying other religions, and seeing the similarities between them helped. I've stopped attending church.
 
I went to a fairly heavily-Christian liberal arts college. For example, chapel was required three times a week, and if you skipped more than the three allotted times per semester during your four years there, you couldn't graduate until you made up the extra time.

Up until recently, I thought I knew everything about how to ward off temptation and not cheat on my wife. Then suddenly, I find myself in a situation I hadn't prepared for, and hadn't been told about in church or school: that it's okay to have sex outside of marriage as long as it's consensual with your spouse.

So I just feel like I'm in uncharted territory now, and I'm not getting any kind of divine direction with it one way or another. I feel like my options are to either freak out and be paranoid about going to hell if my toe slips, or I can just accept the grace to make mistakes and do my best otherwise, based on what I know, have learned, and have yet to learn.
 
Hello. I am in a poly couple. My partner is a fallen-away Roman, more of a Deist. I am Jewish. We both have been trying to understand our polyamorous feelings.

I am the more religious one. We tend to follow the commandments.

As for adultery, we both have had lovers, and sometimes brought it to a threesome. As long as we are honest with each other, there is no cheating. We often talk about wanting another wife, but it is hard finding another polyamorous woman. One guy, a great friend, has carte blanche to have sex with my wife. He doesn't understand the poly thing.

I have found that the Christians I know, as a general rule, are hung up on monogamy. It is worse than the attitude towards being gay.

But really, how many of the patriarchs who had more than one wife were more often rewarded by G*d?
 
Study of Scripture

The study of scripture can lead to misunderstanding amongst friends and lovers that all too often lends itself to hatred and mistrust.

A relationship with Jesus is to be in love with the God called Love by those who love Him.

More fun than a barrel of polymorists. :D

John 5:39
 
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