Personal Summaries

Old but New

Hi, I go by Mia or Mimi, whichever is more comfortable for you. I am a now 45 year old single mom to an 11 year old. I say old but new because I apparently joined this site way back in 2012. I was aware of poly and must have been researching it at the time and do not remember actually joining.

After years of attempting to be in monogamous relationships, and after a divorce to a crazy but cool ex husband, I have decided to be honest with myself and go for what I wanted. My ex hubby introduced me to the open marriage concept because while we loved each other and wanted to still be together, we both found that we still wanted to see other people. Even though I was in denial of the fact that I wanted to see others at the time, he frequently dated other women.

So, like I said, I can't say I am new to this, but I am still not familiar with all the lingo. All I know is that I am a bi female who just loves to be loved and love in return. I know that I'm always looking for that relationship that will just click. Even though I know people say that you have to work at it and there is no such thing as love at first sight, but there is a chemistry with people you get. Sometimes you meet people and you just know they are meant to be in your life.

Since I have sort of come out about my lifestyle (my family knows but never discusses it), I have actively searched for my ideal mmf relationship. Which is way harder than I thought because a lot of people seem to want to make it be just about the sex, but it is so much more. Its about honest and openly expressing your wants and needs with your partners and you all being there for each other and fulfilling those needs.

At any rate, I am single at the moment and just enjoying my life for now until I stumble upon those beings that can both offer and receive what I want and need while allowing me to do the same for them.
 
Heard Dove has a boyfriend. Guess Ill have to work harder to win her over. Im sure this personal ad will make her swoon.

Um... this guy wasnt exactly what I has in mind when I said I was 64", athletic, and educated.
 
New here

Hi my name is Tony. I'm new to this site and this type of community. I am a bisexual man in a MMF triad. My wife and I have been married for 8 years and met the other man in our relationship 2 and a half years ago. He is actually in another country and we are working through immigration issues now. The only way we could figure out how to make it work was to legally divorce from my wife and then since I make the required amount of money to sponsor a spouse and she doesn't for me to marry him and bring him here. Unfortunately that hasn't been as easy of a process as we were hoping. We are still all in the closet about this except a couple of close friends. With him living so far away it's easy enough to keep a secret, but it's hard being so far away without knowing when we might all get to be together. And trips to Europe to see him are really racking up credit card bills quickly. Just looking for some advice or to know that we aren't the only ones. Who are kept apart from the other love of our lives.

It was an interesting way we all met. My wife and I were happy together. I have always been bisexual, but never really acted on it and was very pleased with my wife and our relationship. We met him while traveling and he was just a friend at first. The more we talked and emailed over the months the more emotionally and mentally we all connected, until one day my wife and him had phone sex. My wife was very distraught and brought the situation to my attention and instead of getting upset. I got turned on. Long story short we are all in love and wanting to be together.

Anyway just wanting to say hi and introduce myself and share a little of my experience.
 
I'm TheLimey, at this point in time 46, English, living in South Florida. White hetero male, with a regular 9-5 on an office. I also act, play music and perform comedy. Loves cooking, gaming, and would also identify as a Top in BDSM

The Wife is 37, South Florida born and raised. Half Hispanic white Pansexual female, a student. Also acts, plays music and performs comedy, and is also an avid gamer. We've been married for over 15 years. A bottom in BDSM

The Chica is 31, South Floridian Hispanic, Pansexual female. Interested in escape rooms, reading, baking and ID's as a Top in BDSM.

Currently exploring the edges of polyamory, in a nascent triad
 
Rocky start

Hi everyone, VolitleRollercoaster,

If you've seen my intro thread things don't look like they should be working for me, but rest assured they are. I'm 26, new to the community and polyamory. I'm a hetero F, mono-ish, working a normal office job and attempting to become and actress.

I'm dating a 27 hetero M, poly. We also have a Dom/Sub aspect to our sexual activities. Both of us are gamers and avid Hulu/Netflix watchers with a penchant for Marvel movies.

Our relationship is closed currently while we work on ourselves.
 
Fairly New, and Getting my footing so to speak...

Hello.
My name is Brandi, and I am from Indiana. I am in a long term relationship of 15 years with my primary.
We decided to open our relationship around 3 years ago, and after a lot of discussion, realized that just sleeping with other people was not realistic for us. So, we decided to explore polyamory.
My partner had at that time only ever been with me. This was really what inspired us to take this path to begin with. I had, and have no issues with him having other partners. When we began this journey, however, I really had no intentions of taking on new partners.
That being said, last year I was reunited with an old friend/lover that I hadn't seen in over 16 years. The first night we reunited, things got pretty intense. After that night though, we only talked on the phone, and through texts. He ended up back with a very recent ex of his, and I was pretty upset about it.
10 months later he showed up again, saying he couldn't be without me, and here we are.
My primary is amazing and is handling this roller coaster amazingly well for our first real experience with polyamory. I however am having a lot of insecurities bloom.
I'm really struggling with if this is a sustainable situation, and if I am being realistic with how i feel for my new partner vs. how he feels for me. He is extremely busy, works two jobs, and therefore can only spend time with me once every two weeks or so.
I know that these are emotions I will have to deal with, but I guess I'm just looking for advice on how anyone else handles insecurities. I am not having jealousy issues, just worried that maybe all of this is too much for my new partner, and that he will lose interest (even though he isn't doing anything to make me feel that way).
Thanks for reading and for any advice. So glad I found a place where I can freely talk about these issues.
 
Mid 40s male Texan currently living in Lima, Peru.

Stumbled into open relationships back in 2011, and to my astonishment it was the most honest, relaxed, accepting experience of love I've known. Finally being secure enough to honestly explore my heart and kinks, just about everything gets checked off when girlfriends share the bedroom together at the same time.

What I've learned is that just sex is easy, and empty sex isn't worth it. I'm a romantic at heart, and I'm going to care about those with whom I'm physical. If being close to someone is worth it, it's worth having more than once. I'm glad I'm old enough to know what I'm looking for, and it's a tall order of heart, soul, and tenderness.

I have the good fortune of one in my corner already! Living with an awe-inspiring lady here in Lima--she's not completely green to the poly scene anymore, but still pretty new and exploring. If things keep going well, we'll probably end up hitched and back in the States. I love being open and able to recieve new people God puts in my path for however long is meant to be, but realistically emotional commitments rarely tend to top "2," and when my priority is all of us sharing the bed--that's a lot of exercise in relationship skills by itself to have much more free time for some 'black book.' I find doing poly right makes me a lot pickier about partners, not less!

It's good to have places to share who I really am in a world that really doesn't want the burden of knowing. So I'm grateful for this place to reach out--looking forward to reading and participating more.
 
Hello from India

Hello there,

We are a poly couple (44M/38F) with two kids in a big metro in India.
She is also submissive to me and willing to play bi.
I have lived in America before and have always loved my experience there.
I also had a great relationship with an American woman who is now raising our child there. She still occasionally joins us.

What I am looking for here is someone (around 25-45F) from US/Europe who would be willing to move in with us here in India after some initial online phone and personal meetings. Do get in touch if you are genuinely interested.
 
Looking for someone to talk to

Hey folks!

I decided to join this site because I feel like I have a lot of poly friends, but no one that I feel going to for advice, especially since I don't have any poly friends who aren't also friends with my partner. I hope to find some friends here that I can rely on for that, and also offer some support in return.

I'm 45, been poly for about 15 years. Been married to my 2nd wife for 7 years now. We are both poly but haven't really been dating until the last year, and mostly just me. I'm not looking for a live-in girlfriend, not looking to find a unicorn or start a triad, just looking for someone I can spend some time with and have fun.

My wife is a small business owner, and we are also in a band together. I do a lot of tabletop role-playing games, and we have raised a kid together who is just finding her way as a young adult.

So I'm not here to find dates (there are other sites for that), but I'd love to make some friends. It would be nice to have some friends who don't know my wife that I could talk to if I need relationship advice from a third party, and of course I'd be happy to provide the same for others.
 
Unexpected Vee

Hi everyone.

My name is Jay and I'm in a vee with my wife as the hinge. To say it was unexpected is an understatement, both for me and my wife, as she wasn't looking for anything with anyone.

She is a musician and an Australian DJ began playing her songs on his weekly show. They began talking online and he suggested she co-host a show with him. She agreed and soon they began talking over the phone and one thing lead to another and they fell in love.

Now, we had discussed the idea of polyamory some time ago and I was always under the impression that we would form a triad with a man or woman (we are both bisexual). But it seems my wife had other ideas as she tried a couple of times to forge a relationship with others.

This one, however, has taken off. Though it's long distance, and it's highly unlikely that they will ever actually meet, it is very intense and, admittedly, I feel somewhat put on the back burner. This will hopefully change if and when C (the other arm of the vee) will talk to me as I've tried to talk to him. (He suffers from PTSD relating to his childhood because of his blindness). Anyway, I'll post more about my feelings and anxieties in the relationship thread when I work up the courage to bare my soul.
 
SquarePeg said:
Hi everyone.

My name is Jay and I'm in a vee with my wife as the hinge. To say it was unexpected is an understatement, both for me and my wife, as she wasn't looking for anything with anyone.

She is a musician and an Australian DJ began playing her songs on his weekly show. They began talking online and he suggested she co-host a show with him. She agreed and soon they began talking over the phone and one thing lead to another and they fell in love.

Now, we had discussed the idea of polyamory some time ago and I was always under the impression that we would form a triad with a man or woman (we are both bisexual). But it seems my wife had other ideas as she tried a couple of times to forge a relationship with others.

This one, however, has taken off. Though it's long distance, and it's highly unlikely that they will ever actually meet, it is very intense and, admittedly, I feel somewhat put on the back burner. This will hopefully change if and when C (the other arm of the vee) will talk to me as I've tried to talk to him. (He suffers from PTSD relating to his childhood because of his blindness). Anyway, I'll post more about my feelings and anxieties in the relationship thread when I work up the courage to bare my soul.
Click to expand...

Welcome, SquarePeg. It's fairly common for the early days to be filled with some intense feelings, anxiety, and fear. In my experience, it gets easier over time. I look forward to reading more about your journey.
 
Hi... WE'RE PAM AND JEROME... polyamorous pagans in TN

First off, what drew me (Jerome) to more deeply introduce ourselves at this point was, first, we're more ensconced where we moved to after the summer from the San Luis Obispo area, and then a thread in the General Forum from people asking how you work out sexual arrangements.

We are a long-term couple of 30 years. We have sometimes attempted to include others, but had some rough times with those and spent many years thinking. But we were but busy with children and work. I have been on polyamory.com for 10 months or so, but my background goes back to the early days of polyamory in the mid-'70s. I did some time as facilitator of a page, maybe named the same... Pam started in the late '80s-early '90s.

The reason I bring intimate arrangements up is this has always been a factor... Not that anyone ever asked us... or that people we met had much of a sense of how polyamory deals mostly with emotions/limits, and the real, not just the ideal, with communication, communication, communication; not just "winging it," but connecting with those with affinity... But sexual passions included... IME... It's none of your beeswax, IMPERTINENT WANKERS! But human sexuality should be a valid inquiry... Prospective and current partner(s) talk-story about proclivities, and the gods know I am not angry.

Sometimes I like our separate rooms. I don't want power trips, but shared intimacy. They call it cuckoldry for weird reasons. Sharing, just hanging out, feeling natural and liberated feels good, as well all kinds, your date night, my date night... but whatever... including poly-oversaturation. Just me time also needs space.

So, about us. Pam's an RN in child delivery. She is heading back tomorrow to central California for more big-time money so we can keep improving the forest dream home we live in. The plan is to move in a few years to a nice place near Smokey Mts. with a little more culture than here in Western Tennessee. Pam's a lot prettier than me and embracing renewed passion for our freedom in retirement with the kids all moved out. She says tell 'em... even this frickin' list that has dead places.

I've got a background in all kinds of things, depth psychology, housebuilding, landscaping and general malarky! You can check me out on Facebook: Jerome Aery.

Mostly want people for friends that have actually taken some time to really learn about relationships. We went through a lot with goofus folk.

Beyond this intro you still don't know us! Music... Not necessarily this:
but you can follow traces!
 
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My name is Stephen and I'm kinda new to the polyamory scene.

I met my wife in high school and we married four years later. She was bi-curious when we met but at that age was too scared to explore her sexuality in that way and felt that she couldn't when we were dating. She was upfront with me about her sexuality from day one, and I reassured her that it was never an issue with me.

In 2009, we found a couple that we were comfortable enough for her to experiment with the woman. She had her first bi experience and it was great for her. They are still good friends today, though they only had a short fling. She had a few other short flings over the years but was very cautious.

About a year ago she was ready to swear off being bi and being involved with other women because she hadn't found anyone in a while. I persuaded her to try tinder and she obliged. She found a girl that was interested and met. This girl came over a couple of times, while I was home, and they went to the bedroom and did their thing. It was just a physical relationship and short lived. But I got to benefit from stories and my wife would take care of my needs after the girl left.

Then she met her current girlfriend, we'll call her Ann. They had an instant bond and spent many hours talking and getting to know each other. She brought her girlfriend home to meet me and after a few drinks we all wound up in bed in a 'V' threesome with my wife the focus. This was a first for all of us.

Two days of processing and my wife and I feeling secure and closer, we all had a sit down conversation. Ann liked my wife and wanted to keep seeing her but couldn't wrap her mind around dating someone married and dividing attention and time separately. We all decided to form an exclusive triad. During the NRE phase, we had group outings and fun as well as solo time with each other. This is also where we learned about polyamory and began our research to understand it better.

Ann and I don't have the romantic connection, and she isn't down with group play. My wife spends one night a week at Ann's place and they want more time together, which I'm cool with. My wife is very empathetic and felt that I was being left out, and initiated the conversation about us moving to an openly polyamorous relationship. This way she doesn't feel guilty when she is at Ann's place as I have the opportunity to meet, talk, or have company of my own. The two of them have helped me with dating profiles and we keep open communication. They are both excellent online wingmen.

Having already been physical with another woman both in the presence of my wife and separately, we know she's comfortable with that part of a relationship. We are looking to expand our group of friends, though she is not looking for any male partners or any other women at the moment. We all hope to be comfortable enough to eat dinner together as a big group at each other's houses.
 
Hello

Hi everyone,

I've been sent over here from the Hotwives Forum as my interests are more around polyamory.

I'm a 43 year old British woman, happily married to my husband for nearly 10 years. We have two young children.

My husband became very interesting in hotwifing but after an experience with another man, I think I'm much more interested in polyamory. Forgive my ignorance with the terminology (I've had a look at the glossary - very helpful!). I'm not sure if I'm a poly virgin or not, if I've had one sexual encounter with another man. Does that count?

I would like to have more ethical relationships in addition to my marriage in the future. I'd like to stay married to my husband and keep that as my primary relationship.

Looking for some support with a move into this lifestyle.

Thank you! SM xxx
 
SluttyMouse said:
Hi everyone,

I've been sent over here from the Hotwives Forum as my interests are more around polyamory.

I'm a 43 year old British woman, happily married to my husband for nearly 10 years. We have two young children.

My husband became very interesting in hotwifing but after an experience with another man, I think I'm much more interested in polyamory. Forgive my ignorance with the terminology (I've had a look at the glossary - very helpful!). I'm not sure if I'm a poly virgin or not, if I've had one sexual encounter with another man. Does that count?

I would like to have more ethical relationships in addition to my marriage in the future. I'd like to stay married to my husband and keep that as my primary relationship.

Looking for some support with a move into this lifestyle.

Thank you! SM xxx
Click to expand...
Hi and welcome to the forum. You may want to post an intro in the introduction forum section to get more input.

Polyamory is more about relationships than just having sex. Quite often people who try a swinging type situation find themselves wanting something more. It sounds like that is where you are right now.
 
Wyoming Couple

Hi all. We are a male(50) and female(48) couple. We have been together for 30 years. He is a Master electrician and I am an RN. We live in a semi-rural area of Wyoming but honestly most of the state is semi-rural. We have animals and hoping for a garden this year. We play pool, ride motorcycles, camp/hike, watch stars and various other activities.

We are currently building a tiny house, writing a book and living the best life we can. We are pretty self contained...but we like to travel, go to concerts and museums.

We still have kids at home...but plan on no more. :D

We have been poly for most of our adult lives having dated as individuals and as a couple. We are hopeful in removing ourselves from the dating aspect and finding a permanent partner...but Wyoming is not all that poly friendly.
 
Hi All, I'm Julie and I've been a polyamorist for 10 years. I have been with my husband for 20 years and with my boyfriend for 10 years.
We are in a V configuration. My husband had a girlfriend at some point but it didn't work out. My boyfriend would like to meet another woman but it hasn't worked out so far.
 
HI everyone!

I am relatively new to the poly scene. Me and my wife have been married to each other for more than 7 years. We dabbled around in a couple of threesomes (both ffm and mfm) till we decided to explore a poly lifestyle. My wife has a boyfriend as of now and we have started living together. It has been a bit daunting but so far so good! I thought I'd give an intro!
 
Welcome, medic1

I bet it's daunting moving a relative stranger into your home! Was it a pandemic decision?

When we opened up again after a longish period of monogamy, my husband made it quite clear that he needs to have an unshared home. Be the king of his own castle so to speak. We both host other people, but no-one would live with us in a relationship configuration. Which is kind of a pity, financially, as three incomes would certainly afford a better lifestyle in this day and age.

But of course there really are as many ways of doing poly as there are people to do it. Nuances abound. All the best with uncovering your nuances 🙂
 
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